Creating a family, no one thinks that marriage can be short-lived, after some time the relationship will wane, and you will have to get divorced. If yesterday the quirks of her beloved husband seemed like cute pranks, and the whims of his wife were taken for granted, then after some time two relatives will become strangers to each other.
Cohabitation of two people can only be called a family with a stretch, but a woman and a man sacrifice themselves for common children. Is it justified to do so, as the children themselves perceive such a situation, and how will the divorce of their parents affect them? We will try to answer these questions in more detail.
Of course, you should try to save the relationship to the last, but if the family is left only on paper, and the child and adults are in a state of constant stress, think about the fact that children after a divorce will feel much better and will grow up to be full-fledged personalities.
Many parents, solving their own problems, do not notice that their babies are unwittingly involved in the discussion of completely non-childish issues that can plunge them into a state of deep stress.
How do children survive the divorce of their parents and how do they feel?
Psychologists rightly note that both mom and dad should be honest with their children, regardless of the age of the latter. It is clear that the three-year-old baby and twelve-year-old teenager explain the current situation in different words, but the essence of the story should remain the same in both cases.
The reaction of children to the divorce of his relatives can be completely different and depends on the age of the child and the general mood in the family. But no matter how difficult it is for adults, the main attention should be given to the child.
For a child aged 2-4 years, a divorce looks like leaving one of the parents from the house and the baby cannot understand the reasons for this situation. In this case, it is necessary to tell the son or daughter as correctly as possible why the second parent will no longer live with the family, but at the same time it should be emphasized in every way that the mother or father will not forget about their baby and will love him as before.
Divorce and preschool children (5-7 years old) - this is a completely different problem compared to the first case. Here, the child already clearly realizes that one of the parents will live separately and, even to the extent of his development, understands that mom and dad fell out of love with each other. A parent leaving the family should understand that the child needs his support and communication, and therefore he should see the baby as often as possible.
Teenagers already perfectly understand what a divorce is, but such children after a divorce can become self-absorbed, often rude to the parent with whom they stayed, their overall performance at school is often significantly reduced. In order for such a child to recover, it may take quite a long period of time, and during this entire period the teenager needs increased attention from both parents. At the same time, it is advisable to closely monitor who your son or daughter is friends with, because children after a divorce try to make themselves known, and they often do so in protest form. The point is that if mom or dad did not allow to bring this or that friend or girlfriend to the house, now this character may appear on your doorstep. Here, in no case can you make a scandal and scold the offspring, try to understand him, find an approach and give advice.
Older children after the divorce of their parents already objectively assess the situation and are able to respond to it as adults. True, as you know, each person is individual, which means that problems can arise even with a twenty-year-old son or daughter.