Emotional incontinence - this can be briefly called a temper of temper. Numerous studies of scientists show that a hot-tempered character manifests itself not only as acquired as a result of something, it can manifest itself from birth, as it is laid down at the gene level. Therefore, if parents in childhood may not have noticed, missed or were too lazy to help their child suppress such a quality, then at a more mature age it will be more difficult for a person to cope himself.
Term
According to the explanatory dictionary of the Russian language S. Ozhegov, hot temper is a tendency to ardor and irritability. There is an opinion that the degree of temper depends on the level of human passion, on his temperament.
The following scientists were engaged in the study of the manifestation of temper: A.V. Semenovich, N.M. Pylaeva, T.V. Akhutina, Y.L. Obukhov, N.Ya. Semago, A.L. Sirotyuk and others.
Characteristic of a quick-tempered person
How is a quick-tempered person so different from a calm one? A quick-tempered person, faced with some kind of problem, will lose his temper, that is, show his irritability, aggression, resentment and so on. He will try to solve it by practical methods under the influence of negative emotions, and every time he fails to do this, he will become even more angry and blame for his unsuccessful attempts, first of all, not himself, but circumstances, other people, will be break down on loved ones. While a balanced and calm person, when making a decision to eliminate the problem, he will first think over all the solutions, weigh the pros and cons, and only when he is sure he will begin to act. In this case, of course, there are more chances to solve the problem when there is a clear tactic and plan. "Measure seven times, cut once" - this is the main way to solve the problem, but, unfortunately, it is emotional restraint that does not allow hot-tempered people to understand this truth.
Male and female temper
Most often, a hot-tempered character can be observed in men. In most cases, it manifests itself in the form of irritability and aggression. In addition, an increased temper, which is characterized by anger, is quite common.
Anger is a negative and strong feeling that occurs when a person is extremely dissatisfied with something.
Here you can draw up a chain, which can lead to hot temper: irritability - anger - aggression. When a person is annoyed, he simply can grumble displeasedly, squint his gaze toward the irritant. At the next stage of anger, he can already raise his tone, scream and nervously gesticulate. At the third stage, when he is in the stage of aggression, actions take place that begin with a scream, and can reach assault, including possible damage to furniture or objects around, which were nearby at that moment.
As for the female temper, everything is much more interesting. It mainly consists of resentment and hysteria. Often women deliberately use resentment, as this is the most common way to manipulate other people. Sometimes women deny their resentment, not seeing that with all their actions they show the exact opposite. As for hysteria, aggression may well be present here, actions are no different from men's actions, except that women are more prone to physical self-control. Also a very important factor in female temper is that sometimes they are not quite able to control this, and this happens during certain phases of the menstrual cycle.
Genetic predisposition
Have you ever wondered why the bad character of people is often called bad heredity? A group of German scientists from the University of Bonn, led by Martin Reuter, conducted a study on this issue. They found a gene that today has the name "rs907094". The carrier of this gene is most often those people who are most exposed to short temper.
These same scientists found, due to a study of the human brain, that people who had a survey and were prone to short temper had enlarged left amygdala in the temporal lobe of the brain, namely this part is responsible for the manifestation of emotions.
Loneliness is the result of temper
Hot temper and aggressiveness are those features of a person that others try to avoid by choosing an interlocutor, comrade, friend or partner. After all, who will like it when you are constantly breaking down? Hot temper is the quality that not many are willing to put up with, and, as a rule, the family suffers the most from this. By the way, in ordinary situations, people with such a character trait are no different from balanced people. But as soon as they get into some kind of stressful situation, their true “I” immediately appears.
Temper and irritability are qualities that calm people do not want to face. It is hard to be friends with a hot-tempered person, but it is even more difficult to be in a relationship and build a family. In the end, a calmer person will have to give in and give “control” to another situation, so that he is less annoyed. Especially quick-tempered people take to heart very much when someone does not share their point of view, if for them it is important. As a result, people with a more balanced emotional state have to sacrifice their interests and principles. As the famous proverb says: "Love is evil, you will love and ...".
Intermittent hot temper
This disorder is most often found in a strong half of humanity. Signs are aggression, verbal abuse, uncontrolled anger, assault. Unfortunately, this phenomenon is a mental health disorder and requires immediate treatment, otherwise the consequences can be very different. Outbreaks of anger and aggression most often affect people who are nearby - colleagues, friends, relatives. Because of this disorder, other mental abnormalities may appear - alcoholism and drug addiction, which can further worsen a person’s situation.
Causes of occurrence
As described above, short temper can be established both at the gene level and acquired. Consider the second option. Short temper can be empty and reasonable.
Hot temp is empty
If a person breaks out of the blue, this short temper is empty. Often it is equated with a bad habit. And it arises due to the increased attention of parents, grandparents to the child. Such children most often achieve the desired cry and tantrums. Accordingly, this habit remains with growing up. A mature person begins to think that if he shouts at someone, all his problems will be solved immediately. Thus, the cause of the occurrence can be not only a gene, but also upbringing.
Temper justified
But how can one explain the other - justified temper? This is a conscious temper, which arises as a result of the fact that, for example, object A did not fulfill what he was instructed to do object B. Example: an employee does not systematically fulfill the requirements that have been established. In this situation, the boss has the right to flare up, because the employee does not respond to comments. Also, if you are asked to do something, and you ignore it several times, be prepared for the fact that the next time you will not be asked, but, most likely, your tone will increase. Of course, losing your temper is not right, but sometimes it happens that a person simply does not respond to normal treatment, in which case justified temper is a completely normal reaction.
Hot temper: how to fight?
How to deal with temper? There are a number of ways, and below we will consider the most basic:
- It must be remembered that temper is a negative quality in a person, so you can overcome it by switching to something positive. For example, in a moment of stress, close your eyes for a minute or two, take a deep breath and relax. So, the imagination will pass into the present, and the situation will not annoy you so much, because you no longer feel tense.
- Chat and play with the kids. With their neighbors, nephews, etc. Because children are such small people who are not yet preoccupied with adult problems, and often it is their outlook on life that helps them to see that "the devil is not so terrible as he is painted."
- Shopping is an excellent stress reliever for women. Legs will hurt instead of a head, but why not please yourself?
- Sport. Especially if you have frequent outbursts of anger. Boxing and martial arts will help you steer them in the right direction.
- Just get enough sleep.
There are actually quite a lot of ways, and everyone can choose the one that suits him. The main thing is to remember that there are no unsolvable problems in our lives.