Surely all modern parents watched the famous Soviet cartoon "Kid and Carlson." The story tells how a little boy made friends with an aged man, also with a propeller on his back. The child was lonely. Therefore, he came up with a friend whom he fed and waited daily to visit. This phenomenon is called Carlson's syndrome. What is this ailment?
Worry about an imaginary friend
Many parents suddenly begin to notice that the child is talking with an imaginary friend. Therefore, they have a question: is it a norm or a deviation?
This is Carlson's syndrome known in psychiatry. If the child is not yet 5 years old, this phenomenon is considered to be a variant of the norm. Such fictional friendship is a sign of the development of fantasy. More often than not, a person or a “revived” toy becomes a friend.
According to studies, Carlson's syndrome in children occurs in 65% of cases. In this case, we are talking about kids with a high level of intelligence and developed creative abilities.
Parent misconduct
The reaction of parents to changes in the behavior of their daughter or son is diverse. Some are asked to stop inventing, and eventually begin to scold. Others lead the child to a psychologist or psychiatrist. Still others begin to make fun of fantasies, which is fraught with a loss of confidence and the emergence of behavioral complexes.
However, one should not blame the child, but the parents themselves or even close relatives. Often, it is they who provoke a similar psychological reaction. Therefore, you need to analyze your own actions and actions, and only then look for problems in the behavior of the child.
Common causes
Psychologists identify several common causes of Carlson's syndrome, which parents should pay attention to:
- Lack of impressions in everyday life. During the period of active mental and physical development of the child, vivid impressions are required. For example, you can take him to the zoo and introduce him to animals. Simple walks in the park, blowing bubbles, regular games with parents will also be useful. When a child is deprived of impressions, he begins to invent them on his own.
- Lack of communication with peers. We are talking about situations when a child does not go to kindergarten. A recent move to a new place of residence, where the baby had not had time to make new friends, can also be a kind of stress.
- The feeling of insecurity on the part of parents. Constant resentment from relatives or punishment, even for small misconduct, can provoke an acute sense of insecurity. It becomes difficult for such a child to trust even those close to him.
Other causes of the syndrome
Among other, but less common causes of the syndrome, psychologists identify hyper-custody on the part of parents. Many children from an early age are not perceived as a person. They are not given the opportunity to show their talents in full, to express an opinion. Therefore, they begin to withdraw into themselves and come up with fictional friends.
There is Carlson syndrome in adults. Most often, it is detected in representatives of the stronger sex. Its main reason is the refusal to enter into a serious official relationship. Such men do not allow their woman to prove herself as a mistress, the guardian of the hearth. Most of them are opponents of children, marriage and any other encroachment on freedom and independence.
Alarming symptoms
The presence of an imaginary friend in a child makes many parents turn to a psychologist. It can be difficult to identify the problem of the violation and find a way to help the baby. Moreover, Carlson syndrome can transform over time into a more serious disorder. It is easy to calculate such changes by the following signs:
- daily stories of a fictional friend;
- the appearance of isolation and lack of sociability;
- loss of interest in the outside world;
- the inability to distinguish reality from illusion.
In adults, the syndrome is manifested by childish carelessness and shifting responsibility for what is happening to loved ones.
Necessary examination
In most cases, stories of an imaginary friend disappear on their own by the age of 9. If after this time the child continues stories about communication, it is necessary to seek help from a specialist. A psychologist is involved in the diagnosis of Carlson syndrome. At the consultation, the doctor will help determine the causes of the changes and find the right solution to address them.
Recommendations for parents
Regardless of the cause of the syndrome, parents should behave accordingly. An imaginary friend always helps the child and supports him, is a kind of reflection of his inner world. Therefore, acquaintance with him can be very useful. Psychologists recommend even playing along with the child. You can show that a new friend is also interesting for mom and dad, it is worth asking about his adventures and preferences.
However, you cannot manipulate your son or daughter with the help of a fictional character. For example, to say that he had a good meal or already removed the toys, but his real friend did not follow the instructions of his parents.
Treatment options
If, after consultation, the psychologist confirmed Carlson's syndrome, his treatment boils down to a change in the attitude of the parent towards the child.
If the reason for the appearance of an imaginary friend is a lack of attention, mom and dad will need to revise their daily schedule, try to devote more time to the baby and his leisure. It is important to learn to enjoy his elementary achievements, always to praise and less to punish.
In case of lack of communication, it is enough to record the child in the sports section or in any other circle. In a society of peers, it will be easier for a child to open up, and the problem will be solved by itself. After classes it is necessary to ask the child how he spent time, with whom he met, what he learned.
With excessive rigor and hyper-custody should try to give more freedom of choice. You can make the child responsible, for example, for walking a dog or washing dishes, cleaning his own room. This will certainly help him understand his importance in the family.
Quite often, the cause of Carlson's syndrome is hidden in guilt. Parents do not even know how often this phenomenon occurs in children. So, the baby can blame himself for divorce or frequent quarrels of parents. He can complain to a fictional friend and tell about what is happening, even shift the blame on him. In such a situation, psychologists advise building trust and explaining to the child that he is not guilty of a divorce. Just mom and dad decided to live separately, but they still love their child.
If the baby has a sense of insecurity, he can come up with a defender. As a rule, a famous superhero acts in his role. In such a situation, adults should make every effort so that the child gains self-confidence, feels their support.
A monotonous life and lack of experience can lead to the appearance of the syndrome. The child, inventing a friend and connecting fantasy, thus trying to compensate for this. In order to avoid such situations, it is recommended to spend more time with children in nature, attend exhibitions and sports competitions. A good decision would be to have a birthday party for the child. Here it’s better to connect the fantasy to adults.
Prevention Methods
The most effective prevention of Carlson's syndrome is the creation of a warm atmosphere in the family, where harmony and understanding reign between parents and children.
If the child has manifestations of violent imagination, psychologists recommend redirecting it to the right track. To do this, you can enroll in various circles or sections, for example, drawing, modeling or modeling. Some are suitable for dancing, others have enough sports loads.
Every day, even with a busy schedule of parents, it is important for the child to pay attention. To this end, you can resort to the help of a variety of traditions. For example, to make it a rule every evening at dinner to tell what happened of the day interesting. It is important at the same time to let the child speak out, even if at first glance his narrative seems uninteresting. Some parents prefer to conduct such conversations before bedtime. Time spent with the baby will never be superfluous.
If a child dreams of an animal, it is probably worth thinking about purchasing it. It can be a cat, a dog or a hamster. A pet often acts as a substitute for a virtual friend. In addition, he will need to care, walk and feed. This kind of responsibility positively affects the child’s self-esteem, makes him more independent and at the same time responsible.