Matchmaking is one of the most beautiful ceremonies that precede a wedding ceremony. It takes place with the aim of introducing the groom’s parents to the bride’s family while zealously observing the traditions and instructions of the older generation. This ancient custom ends the courtship period of the groom. From this moment, an agreement is concluded between the two families on the celebration of the wedding and the solution of some everyday issues of the future young family.
How was the matchmaking by the bride from our ancestors?
The ceremony is deeply rooted in the past of Ancient Russia. It was preceded by a long choice by a guy of a suitable couple for family life. Divorces in those days were not what was allowed, it was forbidden to even think about them. In this regard, the choice of the second half was given close attention from the young and their parents.
There was a matchmaking at the behest of older relatives without the consent of the girl for a middle-aged groom, but well-off. No one asked about the feelings of the young virgin. Innocence was sacrificed for a comfortable life, love was broken about the lust of the old pretender to be a husband. The matchmaking on the part of the bride also knew the refusals of the groom. But this is rather an exception to the mores existing in those days.
As a rule, parents, long before the matchmaker was sent in, got acquainted with the family of the future daughter-in-law, were interested in the strength of her family’s household, the size of the dowry and the home-style of the alleged relatives. Matchmaking by the bride also began to develop in past centuries. But this tradition did not acquire a wide scope and gradually died away.
Matchmaking Rite
If everything suited the groom's family, matchmakers were chosen. These included the boyfriend's godparents , close relatives. In order for the agreement to go without delay, a matchmaker from respected and revered village women was invited. She skillfully negotiated with the bride's parents, praised the guy and directed the conversation in the right direction.
The matchmaker’s ability to “crack” endlessly during the ceremony concealed the constraint of the young and the awkwardness of the parents. Timely jokes and proverbs inserted into the conversation gave the matchmaking an extraordinary colorful atmosphere. It was considered a good form to invite a procurator to the bridegroom rite of passage, a sign of a landowner sweep. And such a service was not cheap, so it was available only to a wealthy class.
How matchmaking was prepared
The girl’s parents knew in advance that the matchmakers would come and prepared for the event with her daughter. The best day for the solemn ceremony was Sunday. After the morning service, everyone rushed from the church home to complete the preparations for the arrival of the guests. Special signs were given special attention on this day.
Omens on matchmaking day
To meet a man on the street in the early morning - to a favorable conclusion of the matchmaking.
On the porch, it was necessary to give generous alms to the poor and wretched to receive God's blessing.
If spoons and forks fell from the table, it means that they are in a hurry, the matchmakers are in a hurry with their future son-in-law.
Unusually quiet in the courtyard - matchmaking by the bride will take place calmly, without delay.
The right eye itches - to tears. The right one is bloody.
On this day, they avoided meeting a woman with empty buckets at the well. Before the guests arrived, the girl had to sit at home, not show herself to the eyes of people, so as not to jinx them, not send her a bad news mentally.
From the moment her daughter grew up, her mother prepared her dowry, embroidering towels, bedding at night, stuffing feather-beds and pillows in fluff. The girl also took part in the preparation of her first personal property, which was shown to the matchmakers during the ceremony.
How to match our grandmothers?
The matchmaker table was covered with an embroidered tablecloth in the Red Corner, but nothing was set on it. The bridegroom’s relatives were supposed to bring refreshments to the ceremony of matchmaking for the parents and the girl as a sign of good intentions and disposition to future relatives.
Bells and bells on horse-drawn carts of matchmakers, floody accordion chords notified the arrival of guests. Nobody went out to meet them. After knocking on the door, the owners asked who and why had come to their house. Here the matchmaker came into play. She said that the young merchant had seen the goods for themselves in this house, and whether the owners wanted to sell it. In the hands of the godmother held a loaf of salt. And do not bring God to inadvertently sprinkle salt. This is for the poor life of future spouses. The symbol of prosperity should immediately sprinkle with sugar and gently sweep. It was impossible to leave her on the floor, because it was believed that it was possible to bring damage to the future family, to propagate misfortune.
The order of bidding for matchmaking
The owners pushed forward all the women and girls, vying with each other to praise their virtues and assure them that they were the goods that the merchant needed. After a long bid, they invited the last girl - the future bride - and reported that she was a stale product and was unlikely to please the groom.
For the ceremony of matchmaking, the guests sat at the table, on which they offered the treats of the matchmaker. It's time to praise the bride girl. Enumerated its advantages, demonstrated needlework. The dishes prepared by the young housewife were served on the table and asked to evaluate her culinary abilities.
During a leisurely conversation, questions about the upcoming wedding were resolved, the number of guests, the venue of the celebration, where the young couple will live, were discussed. Until all the nuances were discussed, the music did not play. When there was not a single unresolved issue, a rushnyk was tied to the hands of young people . This meant that bridegroom rite took place. Following was the accordion, gifts were exchanged, songs were sung, toasts addressed to the happy couple.
How to conduct a matchmaking by the bride of the bride?
Modern youth does not make a big problem out of the ritual of the bridegroom. Rather, it is necessary for the parents of the future young couple to meet in order to discuss the celebration itself - the wedding. Since themed weddings are fashionable now, the rite of matchmaking has a certain orientation.
How to conduct modern matchmaking on the part of the bride and beautifully furnish it? The answer to this question is offered by wedding agencies. Depending on the topic of the event, a holiday scenario is developed. If you follow the ancient traditions of our ancestors, the event can be transferred to a country house. Thought out the atmosphere of the event, corresponding to the times of Ancient Russia. The future bride and groom, guests are dressed in spacious embroidered outfits. Mandatory attribute - icons - are held in the hands of parents.
Writing a scenario of modern matchmaking
When the bride's matchmaking is organized, the script on the part of the bride is aimed at an advantageous presentation of the girl's virtues, education, the ability to conduct household chores, creative abilities, and striking character traits.
Parents of a young housewife, relatives are actively involved in bidding, demanding to pay attention to the undeniable qualities of the girl.
Vividly represent the matchmaking by the bride verses written specifically for each thematic rite. During the offering of gifts to relatives, all those involved in the event are mentioned in verses. A joking rhyme in the correct form will remain in the memory of each participant in the ceremony, will give the effect of triumph and a unique charm.
Whatever the matchmaking scenario is, its main task is to unite the two families, set up a positive outlook on future relatives and help the young people worthily celebrate the birth of their family.