What is meant by complex relationships, which, unfortunately, are very common in the 21st century? It is difficult to say whether this is good or bad, but some couples, as if they did not want to, simply cannot live differently.
Usually they talk about 2 types of relationships: simple and complex. The first ones can be good when everything rests on a great love for each other, mutual respect, a huge number of common topics and, of course, chic sex. Such a relationship is most likely an exception to the rule, but there are examples.
But they can be bad when there are absolutely no points of contact, a common zone of comfort, interests, and usually all this is accompanied by a weak attraction to each other.
Now is the time to discuss a complex relationship. They do not apply to either one or the other. More often in practice it turns out that they lack just one single factor: for some, these are common topics for conversation, others have problems in bed, and others have mutual respect for each other.
Later in the article, we will consider four main features of very complex relationships.
I can’t figure out the causes of the problems.
This is the first sign. No matter how hard one of the half tries to enter a competent dialogue and get to the bottom of the problems, often the other half either avoids contact and conversation in general, or tries to constantly transfer the topic of conversation to another. And the reasons for this are completely different:
- One of them may be in an attempt to hide some unpleasant moments from the past, where the root of the problem is buried.
- The next one is the banal indifference of the partner and the desire to leave everything as it is, however bad it may be.
- Well, finally, your partner has the other half, which is given a huge amount of time, and all the energy goes only to her.
Each of these examples can greatly aggravate an already serious relationship problem.
Betrayal of oneself
This sign of a very complex relationship is one of the most common in the modern world. Initially, almost any person positions himself as a freedom-loving, highly intelligent and with a huge amount of ambition. However, a partner can destroy all these ambitions and your qualities in you for some time.
Initially, he binds you to himself as much as possible, of course with his very good attitude towards you. And then the worst thing comes, when you can’t imagine life without him, and he begins to use it in every way - from the ban on developing itself and working to the banal restraint from communicating with friends and girlfriends.
And as soon as the first urge on your part to eternal concessions and forgiveness of all possible sins of the partner began, consider that you began to dig a hole for yourself. From this trap, very few people emerge victorious. The most final stage is when you have completely forgotten about your personality and that your word should also have some weight.
After a while nothing changes
Time is a terrible force. It can either improve complex relationships and bring them to a completely different level, or vice versa, destroy them to such an extent that it will no longer be possible to return to previous feelings.
It would seem that the worst thing is when for a certain period of time it only gets worse. However, a much worse indicator is complete stagnation. He had never done anything good.
If at some point you realized that it was time to change something, and your partner did not appreciate this zeal and showed complete indifference, then this is a signal for you. In such a situation, cardinal decisions must be made. If no attempts to clarify the situation have worked, then you need to take the will into a fist and break off such a relationship, because it will only get worse.
Fear of being alone
It is very difficult to overcome the fear of being alone and not finding anyone else. In fact, such thoughts arise in you because during the relationship you only thought about how to make the partner satisfied. But you completely forgot about yourself, about your "I". Your self-esteem has fallen very much, and here all fears lie.
You need to take your will into a fist and remember who you were before the relationship. Re-promote all your ambitions, dreams and become a strong personality. And forget forever the thought that this partner is the only and last one to love you.
Relationships in Habit Mode
In no case should you stay in a relationship simply because you are used to each other. By the way, in the stories about complex relationships, there is a long-known theory that love lives for three years. And it’s very difficult to argue with that. But, of course, this does not mean that after three years you need to abandon your partner. Since love will pass sooner or later, the most important thing is how you will relate to each other later.
Human history knows a huge number of examples when, after the most beautiful and immense love, there comes complete indifference, and sometimes open hatred. But people continue out of habit, and this is the worst thing you can imagine. It turns out that you are breaking your own life, because you are losing the opportunity to find a relationship in which you will be truly happy.
So what if love is gone? We must try our best to maintain the best possible attitude towards each other. At a minimum: respect, attraction and willingness to help and support in any situation. This will help maintain your relationship for a very long time, possibly for a lifetime.
Why is it better to end a difficult relationship
No need to consider parting as something unthinkable and terrible. This is absolutely normal, and the sooner you understand this, the easier it will be in the future. Especially if all your attempts to maintain a relationship have not been noticed by the partner, or even more so if the partner tried to interfere in every possible way with this.
It is impossible to say about complex relationships that they are terrible, but at least they are uncomfortable, uncomfortable, and most importantly, there is no development in them. Of course, it’s always a pity to spend the nerves, money and time to create and improve relations, but it’s better to leave now while you are still able to make informed decisions and control the situation. And you need to remember a simple human truth: further only worse!
You cannot forever remain a victim in a relationship. You must remember your personal happiness and psychological health. You are not guilty of the fact that your partner has lost interest in you and is not trying to establish contact. Especially if he did not care about everything that happens to you. You just need to leave, and in one day or an hour you will meet a person who will give you true happiness.