How to apologize to a guy if you are to blame?

Each of us sometimes makes mistakes, breaks the grudge on a loved one or acts in relation to him not in the best way. In time and correctly asking for forgiveness means giving up your pride for the sake of a loved one and relationships. How to apologize to a guy to forgive? How to make it so that it does not harbor resentment?

It is very difficult to find the right words. And it’s even harder to approach an offended person. Suddenly, he will reject an apology and a relationship completely destroyed? To avoid this, you need to apologize in a timely manner, and most importantly sincerely, if you really are to blame. How to correctly apologize to a guy will be discussed in the article.

You can never ask forgiveness if the girl is not to blame

A very important rule in relationships is not to apologize if you are not to blame (a). There are people who are offended for a reason and without it. They use partner’s guilt for blackmail and manipulation.

For example, a guy doesn’t like that his girlfriend uses makeup, puts on too short skirts, cuts her hair short. He constantly resents this, arranges scenes. Thus, the young man manipulates the girl, the more he is allowed to do this, the more often he will do so.

Apology is necessary only when there really is a fault.

Apology and excuse are two different things.

So, to apologize is to admit that you are wrong, to take responsibility for the committed act. This is a difficult step, but it must be done. How to apologize to a guy? The easiest way is to say that you are aware of your guilt, you understand that you should not have done so. And no excuses, because they cross out all that has been said and cast doubt on the sincerity of words.

Another rule - do not shift the blame on the partner. If you need to apologize, for example, for raising your voice at him or talking rudely, then you do not need to say that the reason for such an act is his behavior. Shifting guilt will exacerbate the conflict. Need to decide for yourself - we apologize or deal with his behavior?

Right moment

You need to act according to the situation. Sometimes it’s worth apologizing even at the height of the conflict. For example, she said too much, harshly, rudely plus accused of all mortal sins - it is better to apologize right away, especially if there was a quarrel on a domestic matter.

But how to apologize to the guy, if the conflict was serious, there were misunderstandings and grievances? In this case, it is better to cool down, recover and figure it out. But it is worth remembering that the longer you pull with an apology, the stronger the resentment.

If a girl does not apologize for her mistake for a long time, the guy begins to write off her behavior that offended him, not a mistake, but a bad character. That is, he thinks that if a girl does not apologize for a long time, it is because she does not feel guilty, which means that this is her characteristic behavior.

A few days is the maximum time to say “I'm sorry” and end the conflict. If the guilt is mutual, it is also better to first start a conversation and find out the relationship, so as not to aggravate an already difficult situation.

What words can not be pronounced

How to apologize to a guy so that he does not blame insincerity? There are a few words that will nullify all efforts. It is “if” and “but” when they are used in an apologetic speech, the whole meaning is reversed.

For example: "I'm sorry for being late, I'm not on purpose" and "I'm sorry if my being late offended you." That is, the second option actually sounds like this: "I'm not sorry," and even in this phrase the responsibility is transferred to the guy himself: "My lateness also offended you."

The guy will believe that the apologies are simulated and that they are trying to manipulate him.

We are looking for a reason

First you need to understand yourself and answer the question: why did you do this? Is the problem in a relationship, in a situation, or in you? When the reason becomes clear, it is necessary to work with it.

For example, conflicts constantly occur over money. It is necessary to find out what exactly annoys the man in the girl’s behavior. If the guy is dissatisfied with excessive spending, it is worth observing yourself, agree with him on the issue of budget and expenses. Apologize to each other and seek a compromise.

Do not wait for an instant forgiveness. Especially if the offense is serious and the guy is very offended. It takes time for the emotions to cool, the memories to subside.

How to apologize to a guy if you are very guilty? Where to start a conversation?

In this case, the speech should be built in such a way that it contains words of regret about what happened, remorse, and you also need to voice your desire to maintain your relationship. For example: “thank you for agreeing to listen to me”, “I’m guilty”, “I understand you”, “I don’t know how I would behave in your place”, “I want to keep our relationship and am ready to wait as long as I need so that you forgive me. "

If a guy accepted an apology, this does not mean that he unconditionally forgave. For a while he will still be angry, watching the girl’s attitude to himself. Resentment does not pass instantly, it takes time for everything to fall into place.

What you should not do during an apology

Sobs, tantrums, tears, supplications and excessive dramatization of the situation will not help. Even if emotions are overwhelming, it is not necessary to demonstrate them. The man will regard this as a woman's desire to put pressure on him.

You can try to do something, that is, apologize for the action. Show your beloved that he is valuable and important, that they are valued.

So what can you do?

Ways to Apologize

All apologies, psychologists are divided into correspondence and full-time. They advise apologizing by looking into the eyes.

Consider how to apologize to a guy in your own words and looking directly into your eyes. This is the most difficult way. Therefore, you should not ask for forgiveness without prior preparation.

First you need to think it over, roughly calculate how it can respond. Develop a behavior strategy. You can make a rough plan when and what to say.

Some tips on what to do and how to behave during an apology:

1. To look him only in the eyes - this will testify to sincerity.
2. To tell the truth.
3. Promise only what can be done.
4. Do not raise the voice on the guy.
5. Do not blame him for anything.
6. Listen and remember everything he says;
7. If there is any disagreement, find out immediately.
8. You need to behave calmly and restraintly.
9. If there is fault, acknowledge it.

There is no universal advice on how to apologize to a guy, what to do and how to behave. It all depends on the person and on the situation, as well as on the degree of guilt, and on how much they value relationships.

There is an easier way to apologize to a guy - in SMS. But you can write messages only with minor quarrels. The most common option is to write words (verses, prose) and insert a sad emoticon at the end. Some tips for apologizing in SMS:

• write messages not often (after 3-4 hours);
• Do not bother the man;
• write sincerely;
• Do not repeat the same thing in SMS, otherwise the guy will be tired of reading;
• if he does not answer, then either something is wrong, or he is waiting for some specific actions or words;
• at the end of the correspondence ask: “Are you ready to forgive me?”;
• wait patiently for an answer.

An apology must come from the heart and be sincere. Do not be zealous with emoticons or postcards. And the main rule - apologizing, do not make excuses and do not shift the blame.

Apologies with a twist, or How to apologize to a guy nicely

Apologies can be unusual, extraordinary. To hit a guy and get forgiveness, it’s worth a little turn on imagination and courage.

Here are some examples of a creative apology process:

• cake with romantic words;
• apology banner;
• a box with wishes (but you should immediately set a limit, for example, no more than 5 wishes per day);
• romantic horse ride, evening, picnic;
• a gift or a surprise with humor (for example, ear plugs, let them cover their ears during quarrels);
• an unusual gift - a plot on Mars or a star with the name of a loved one, a certificate must be placed on the wall;
• a romantic gift - a T-shirt with a joint photo and beautiful words.

You can also hand over a picture embroidered with your own hands, a man-made tree - a symbol of love (if the man is interested in such things), a puppy or kitten (unless, of course, the beloved loves animals).

Is it worth it to apologize?

Before apologizing to a guy, you should think about whether this should be done at all.

You should analyze the situation, maybe the guy is manipulating. Sometimes, pretending to be offended, a young man is simply trying to get something from the girl. If you have come to the conclusion that this is exactly your case, then you should not go on about the man. It’s better not to apologize and not take any steps towards reconciliation, let him think and decide for himself that it is more important for him to maintain relations or achieve his own.

If a quarrel has occurred due to the fact that the guy and the girl on some issue do not have the same opinions, an apology is also inappropriate. If a woman only thinks differently than a man, this is no reason to consider herself guilty. Everyone has the right to their own opinion. In such a situation, it is better to just try to find a compromise.

In the case when a young man stands his ground, once and for all it is necessary to decide what is more important for the woman herself: so that the man takes into account her views or relations? If the guy does not want to concede, most likely, it will always be so. That is his character.

Therefore, if a girl wants to maintain a relationship, she will have to come to terms with the fact that only the opinion of the guy will be taken into account. It is worth considering carefully whether the girl is ready for this.

Conclusion

There is nothing worse than broken hearts. Therefore, a girl, if guilty, must apologize to a guy. After forgiveness, you need to start life from scratch and try not to repeat such mistakes in the future in order to maintain a relationship with your loved one.