How to fall in love with a lover: advice from a psychologist

Countless people of both sexes have been trying for an enormous number of years to understand why, from a certain time, they are uncontrollably drawn not to the person with whom they once connected their seemingly eternal fate, but to a completely stranger person.

Some of them even wonder how to fall in love with their new chosen one. Some are so passionately attracted that desire causes them to go beyond the boundaries of the rules formed in the society in which the individual was brought up and grew.

Physiology and love

Physiological arousal pushes for sexual intercourse, sometimes so hot and limitless, that a woman begins to realize that something happened to her that she could not refuse under any circumstances. But her partner is limited only to beautiful gestures, passionate intimate encounters. About love, which would have a serious continuation, he does not think. But the woman is excited by the idea of ​​how to fall in love with her lover so much that the unity is not only in bed, but also in souls. And sometimes dreams start and much further.

Alpha males

fall in love with a former lover

It is very easy to confuse love on the verge of frenzy with a serious relationship that inevitably leads to marriage when two aspire to it. It happens that a woman never succeeds in falling in love with herself as a lover, an alpha male by nature as a candidate for the role of the main man of her life. These charming men will easily go on violation of the rules created by them, will not allow even a slight hint of someone's primacy over their actions.

In order for such a man to plunge into a relationship that ends with a serious continuation, it is necessary to fall in love with a lover as an individual who has lost his head, so that his personal needs cease to be dominant in his desires, and the concept of “necessity” subordinates his frivolous moods to family interests. Alpha males very often have a reputation as a ladies man, but this is true until the stage until his leadership begins to stagger under the pressure of questions and problems.

As a rule, such men fall under the hypnotic influence of sexual desire and love in their young years, and become husbands with the best of intentions. But the biological characteristics of their bodies begin to prevail with age over the once given oaths of allegiance, and they begin to love not their halves. But family relations at the same time do not break for one reason or another. "Lucky", caught in the path of such Don Juan and bought for his irresistibility and charisma, it comes to mind to think about how to fall in love with a married lover. Dreams of living together with her chosen one push her to think that she can be better than a deceived wife. A woman, not beingware of condemnation, may ask her friend: “How can I make my lover run after me?” The tips can be different, up to the point that it would be nice to have plastic surgery and become even more beautiful or rinse it with a potion over which to cast a spell.

A friend may not know how to fall in love with a man-lover, but she will not refuse to help with advice. Moreover, she heard that one of her work colleagues, after turning to love magic, managed to get an adored subject, while she was silent that the individual was not married.

how to fall in love with a lover

If he is not free ...

The task of obtaining a person not burdened with marriage is different from the idea of ​​luring a family out of return without returning a married lover. How to fall in love with a man who feels responsible for the fate of his children? In general, it is not difficult. There are many methods of seduction - from inviting smiles to active actions. Insanity of the father of the family can come amid a crisis of relations in his house. But the main reason is that women’s ways to fall in love with a married lover are skillfully applied so that he leaves the family for a sweetheart. The pliability of the stronger half is explained by the fact that most men are initially ready to change partners or simultaneously combine sexual relations with several women.

Falling in love with a married lover to the point of insanity threatens that jealousy and distrust can arise in relations between partners. Male love craziness can be based not on a deep feeling and strongest heart affection, but on love and passion. Comparing the mistress with the become familiar wife, the representative of the stronger sex becomes a blind man with blurred consciousness. Suspicion and suspiciousness can greatly develop if he becomes aware that his current girlfriend, who brought him to leave his family, once had a passionate relationship with someone.

Crisis relationship

Male irritability sometimes transcends boundaries. The woman will have to justify herself, perforce, and she herself will not be able to tell even the closest friend about how a lover in love behaves. In mutual relations, bitterness and hostility may begin to manifest. And now she will not ask: “How to make a lover run after me?”, But will begin to think about breaking up the relationship. Not only jealousy makes couples suffer.

Crisis relations come with the disappearance of romance, with the beginning of the perception of each other as a necessary necessity. Psychologists have come to the conclusion that if earlier the period of transition from fabulous cohabitation to routine was stretched to seven years, then now with the complication of social relations and increased workloads, personal relationships suffer faster. The period for which partners begin to be disappointed in each other has been reduced to 3 years. It happens that couples are found less and less, but interest in each other does not disappear completely. A woman who does not seek to change anything in her established relationship will benefit from the advice of psychologists on how to fall in love with a lover anew. More on this later in the article.

Is it necessary?

To begin with, it will not be superfluous to assess without cunning how necessary it is for itself. After all, to be a lover means to come to terms with the fact that a man is nearby only sometimes, that the chosen one on the side is not the kind of person who at any moment will calm and caress, as they say, "will shoulder up" and help.

It would be nice to decide on the question whether he needed this connection. Perhaps he calls less often now, and avoids meeting with common acquaintances. Jointly spent time was needed only to satisfy passion, or did a man need not only sex?

Remembering the first meetings, it is necessary to analyze what pushed the partners into a joint embrace, whether any obligations were expressed at the beginning of a love affair, whether updating the connection would bring joy and reassurance to both partners.

Need time

If a woman firmly decides that this man is valuable to her, but the time has come to look around a bit and pause, then she will do the right thing. Let there be circumstances when a distance will be established between partners and there will be no opportunity on her part to even call. Let enough time pass, during which there will be no attempts on the part of the woman to see each other or somehow make themselves felt. But at the same time, what is happening to the man needs to be informed. That is, you should give him the opportunity to understand that he must meet his mistress, he needs her, he just missed her.

And then the moment will come when the man will reappear. By this minute, a woman should always be ready, because falling in love with an ex is not only pleasant, but it can also be costly. During the separation, the lover should become much more attractive than before his last departure. After all, about the fact that men love with their eyes, thousands of lines are written and millions of words are spoken. All this came from those people who faced this situation in practice.

But if the man himself did not take the initiative, did not call, did not ask for a meeting, and the woman feels that the break in the relationship has dragged on, and besides, the talkative neighbor said that she met this friend, and for some reason he was so sad, then act will have to. Remembering the first contact, your image at that time and comparing it with the current one, it is advisable to try to return the lost, of course, correcting it taking into account the past time.

The mood of the first meetings

how to fall in love unmarried

How to fall in love with an unmarried lover with whom there was a temporary separation? Optionally, it becomes the same again as it was at the first date or at the first meeting. But the mood with which you charged him then should again return to him and stir up his feelings.

If the meeting is random and the woman has to take the initiative in her own hands, it is not advisable to show obsession and hot emotions, but one cannot enter into the image of the inaccessible “snow queen” so as not to frighten off the former lover.

It is necessary to be joyfully surprised, to recall some pleasant episode for both, to take an interest in the successes achieved during the separation in the plans that he shared during previous meetings. That is, you need to make it clear that the woman was thinking about him all the time, but she’s not going to impose herself, and now she’s running out of time, but there’s a minute for a cup of coffee in the nearest cafe.

How to perceive?

lover was running after me

By the reaction of the man to her new image and unexpected meeting, it will not immediately be clear how ready he is for the resumption of relations. If the chatting over a cup of coffee ends with an offer to drop by today, see what kind of settings his computer is upset with, the evening of a former lover seeking reconciliation will end in a common bed.

When the passion provoked by separation settles down, it will be possible to figure out whether the relationship will continue or not. A newly flashed love can develop into a deeper feeling. The man during the separation, most likely, was able to determine what the degree of need was for him for the nearly lost girlfriend. Perhaps it will happen that a woman, having lived for some time in a regime of freedom from constant expectations and again plunging into him, does not want to continue the relationship as a lover herself, and the man will never make a proposal for marriage.

To fall in love with a married lover once again, as if there were no previous disagreements and misunderstandings that had returned to the bosom of the family, the task is very difficult.

It’s not difficult to regain a stranger’s man who himself doesn’t mind again slipping away from a boring life into the atmosphere built for him and all his desires. But to create the conditions so that he could treat his girlfriend on the side as his most important woman, that is, not everyone succeeds in truly falling in love with his former lover. This requires finding out about the merits and demerits of his wife, but not from the man himself. You don’t need to ask directly, but it is necessary to analyze his appearance, grooming, clothes, taste habits.

Forget about tantrums and reproaches

How to fall in love with a former lover and keep him?

A few tips:

  1. You can never give a man tantrums, but let him have some tears at the moment of separation.
  2. Do not talk about the affairs of your friends, but always emphasize that he is the most important friend.
  3. When sharing your own dreams and plans, put emphasis on the fact that you will be glad to participate in them.
  4. Do not reproach with unfulfilled promises, but with a quiet sigh, make it clear that you are still waiting for their implementation.
  5. Do not apply tons of shadows and lipstick on yourself before his arrival, but neatness and attractiveness should accompany a woman at any time of the day or night.
  6. Please it occasionally with your favorite dish, but never compare aloud your culinary abilities and the talents of his wife, give him the opportunity to do it himself.

You should always remember that a man is only a male, and all the virtues of a lover only set off her unsurpassed sexuality. Be a lover in bed a mystery that he wants to solve. Then you will not be tormented by the question of how to fall in love with a lover again.

how to fall in love with a married lover

Unwritten rules for guys

It happens that a representative of a strong half needs a mistress not even because of sex and chic appearance, but because unwritten rules so require. Often men with a certain social position relate to the possession on an ongoing basis of beauty on the side as a necessary attribute of their existence.

In this case, the lover, suspecting her of prudence, sees in a woman only a means of satisfying her physiological and aesthetic needs on the basis of confidential and material relationships. But not all women make contact due to their commercialism; some simply love their respectable gentleman.

According to psychology, you can make a lover run after you if you can convince him that he will not be able to find a more faithful and beautiful wife.

If the lover is older

Much depends on the age of the man. A mature lover looks at a young lady not as a woman, but as a girl. He begins to awaken, except for sex drive, the feelings of a patron, almost his father, although not everyone is aware of this.

All people over the years, regardless of gender, tend to think about their age. Possessing a young body of a lover in men creates the illusion of their own long-term usefulness, stimulates his sexual activity. Therefore, a woman who seeks to fall in love with her lover as a future husband, and not as a stepping stone to high material security, will have to adapt, first of all, to his libido and sometimes put up with her own dissatisfaction. After all, a very long time ago, people concluded that true love is sacrificial.

The time has already passed when unequal age marriages caused bewilderment and pity for the young wife. Now studies by sexologists convincingly prove that thirty and forty, sometimes even fifty years old partners, in fact, are people of the same generation, have the same interests and similar views. The development of their own physical abilities in men has become not just a fashionable trend, but also supported by the attention of society to this issue. Morning runs, regular dosed exercises in gyms strengthen health and, accordingly, increase male sexual potential.

That is why the desire of a lover to marry an age fan is justified not only by sensual relationships, but also by the physiological abilities of a person. The coincidence of temperaments is a decisive factor in the stability of love affairs. Falling in love with a lover as a man with similar requests will be the key to either a long romance, or a close relationship will naturally grow into family ties. Although the reincarnation of a tender love affair from time to time in a permanent joint living with a stamp in a passport or without it most often happens if the age difference is insignificant and no one has to adapt to the physical needs of the partner. But are love relationships always stable, even if they are achieved in a difficult way?

fall in love with a married

If the lady is married

If suddenly there comes a moment when the look of a new acquaintance burns, and what color the eyes of the husband without tension can not be remembered, then female happiness once deceived you and directed you along the road that led to a dead end. Men tend to take advantage of women's weaknesses, even if they are someone's wives.

Loving relationships between a married woman and her lover develop in different ways. Much depends on whether her new chosen one is free or also married, whether there is a difference in age and what financial situation the lover has. Sometimes a married woman does not even think about how to fall in love with her lover, because she does not need this from an outside connection.

She remains a diligent mother, trying to seem like a loving wife, housekeeping does not become her burden. Outwardly, nothing is changing. From an affair on the side, she expects only tickling nerves and satisfying her physical attraction. Often, husbands with a weak libido try to compensate for their reduced sexuality with increased attention to the needs of the family, they become loving fathers and caring husbands.

Guilt

There is no need to make a husband guess that his wife has developed an interest in another man. But it’s sometimes even useful to unwind, get aroused from passion, so that guilty feelings make you look at your husband not only as a little fed up sexual partner, but also appreciate his loyalty and devotion. A smart husband with all reinsurance actions by a woman will still feel a strange alienation, and possibly indifference from a woman, and will try to correct the situation, considering himself guilty of what is happening.

Considering the option of a strong love of a married woman in a married man-womanizer, we have to admit that in this case a weak half may depend on the desires and possibilities of the lover, and, as a result, ignoring family responsibilities on both sides. The result of such a passion is female reflection on how to fall in love with a lover, if she is married, he is married, and no one plans to destroy their own families. After all, the beginning of a new relationship is always accompanied by the novelty and acuteness of the sensations, which gradually subside.

This is known to both partners-lovers, because the accumulated experience during the time elapsed in the marriage signals that everything that happened before can happen again now. But the physical attraction that natural instincts endowed with every healthy person can be difficult to overcome. So a couple of lovers meet for many years, occasionally enjoying the stolen happiness, but not destroying the peace of their children and spouses.

What to do a married lady?

how to fall in love with yourself

What to do a married woman who fell in love with a free man, and their feelings are mutual? A so-called love triangle is created in which it can be difficult to figure out which of the three is the injured party, and which is the main culprit of what happened. If a self-sufficient beautiful woman was subjected to violence in the family as a result of unreasonable jealousy, then she has a natural reciprocal internal resistance, leading to the search for a new partner. But breaking family relationships is not always possible. The reason for the impossibility of leaving the husband’s family is most often worried either about the elderly mother-in-law and mother-in-law, or about joint or adoptive children.

The maternal principle takes precedence over love experiences. Moreover, it is not always that a married woman has full independence and is able at any time, in the absence of inhibitory reasons, to control her fate. Well, you have to accept the conditions that are created by life, and adapt to them. An unmarried lover is free from obligations and, if his feelings correspond to what he convinces his woman, he will be able to organize a joint business trip or vacation without arousing suspicions from her husband.

The relationship of a married woman with a free man will certainly make her worry and think about how and with whom he spends evenings without her. But on the other hand, intimate meetings can be more frequent, because he is not busy solving family problems. He will not have to pretend to his own wife that she is interested in him. A single lover is always ready for a date, so there is no need to stealthily meet during lunch breaks. Therefore, the female disposition towards men who are not connected by family relationships does not have black colors and a spirit of rivalry, suspicion, and sometimes envy.

The question remains how to hide it all from your own husband. Here trips to friends will always help out, or there will be an hour or two in between visits to the hairdresser and the beautician. Over time, the passion will subside, the meetings will not be so hot and long-awaited, or, conversely, they will move to a level when her husband knows everything and a decision will have to be made to break up with one person.

Conclusion

We think from the article it became clear how to fall in love with a lover. As you can see, this is not very difficult. You just have to think in advance whether it is necessary so much that you do not regret everything and suffer from unfulfilled hopes.

Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/B3014/


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