Couples in which a man lives at the expense of a woman are not rare today. For many people with stereotypical thinking or with the views of the old school, this causes bewilderment. And contempt for a man. He is immediately called Alphonse, not understanding the situation. But is this really so? Of course no.
Outlook on the situation
So, there is a couple in which a man lives at the expense of a woman. Is this alignment normal? Firstly, this applies only to them - direct participants in the relationship. Secondly, yes, fine. After all, if they are together, then both of them are happy with everything!
Of course, there are situations when a man elementarily sits on a woman’s neck, hangs his legs, and she simply cannot figure out this state of affairs, which does not suit her at all, because of her love for him and because of her weak-willed character.
But in this case, you just need to get tougher. Don't like the layout? No need to be silent about this. Many of these women feel sorry. But in fact, in fact, if they allow you to sit on your neck, then this is their choice.
And now - a look from the other side. Many believe that when a man lives at the expense of a woman, it is ugly. Moreover! They say: "This is not a man." But what if you look at it just humanly? Ignoring the floor? Does it characterize a person, no matter who he is (male or female), on the positive side, the fact that he allows himself to live at someone’s expense, spending money earned by other people's labor? Few approach this issue from this perspective, and in vain.
Partnership
Not always a man wants to live at the expense of a woman - it just happens sometimes. Left without work, for example. The source of income was gone, but the needs remained. And suitable vacancies are zero. He just has to live on the money of his beloved.
In this case, the vast majority of men, purely human, assume responsibility for the fulfillment of all other worries that the woman previously dealt with. Thus, the life of a beloved is greatly facilitated. She earns, and her man helps in everything else. This is called the division of labor. And if everyone is happy with this situation, then why, in fact, not?
Play on the senses
Well, these were all life situations. Now it’s worth talking about the notorious gigolos. What are the names of men living at the expense of women? Exactly. Although the word has a very deep concept.
Alphonse are scammers. And they act according to a very sophisticated scheme, playing on women's feelings and emotions, which is very mean.
First, such a man is rubbed into trust. It behaves like an ideal - listens carefully to the interlocutor, shows interest in her and her stories, showers with unbanal compliments, observes all her highlights, supports her point of view. So gigolo probes the soil - makes a psychological portrait of a lady, and also finds out the level of her prosperity and degree of credulity.
Pulling money
He draws with intimacy, and not because he appreciates the girl’s feelings. He just "takes it on a leash." Although he did not mind visiting guests - to evaluate the situation, housing, values. Then, Alphonse begins to talk more and more often about himself - about his life, problems, troubles, difficult past. And as if by chance. And so it goes on for quite some time. While at one moment he, lamenting that he would never ask for such a dear and beloved person, hints to the lady of the heart a loan in a large amount.
Most women, having heard a heart-rending story strewn with a ton of problems (invented, of course), lend money to the one they really love. And he, taking the amount, dissolves, leaving the next used lady with a broken heart and an empty wallet.
However, there is a second option. Alphonse simply becomes a man living at the expense of a woman - he goes to her full dependency. And so that she does not hint that she is not quite happy, she constantly feeds with promises and showers compliments. How long it lasts depends on the patience of the woman. However, everything can break off when the Alphonse finds a more affluent object.
Other signs of alpha
This topic is actively discussed in psychology. A man lives at the expense of a woman in some cases, and they have already been described. Now, it is worth noting the attention of several signs by which it can be recognized.
He does not invest in his woman, but at the same time uses her resources. A man can live in his beloved’s apartment and drive her car, but at the same time buy groceries at home, give her gifts, pay gym memberships, etc. Is this not the case? So, he is interested not in a woman, but in her resources.
He is actively interested in the work and connections of his lady. A man asks someone to introduce him, introduce him to a certain circle of respected persons? It is possible that the capabilities of a woman are important to him, and not herself. For the sake of the experiment, you should refuse the request. He will react calmly - which means that there was no self-interest in his words, he simply considered this a convenient thought and decided to voice it.
He asks for money. This is the most obvious. You should be wary, even if he lends money. Although they are usually not returned. It is worth trying to start to refuse. If a man’s interest in a woman begins to fade, then you can be sure, he is already looking for a more wealthy option.
The opinion of psychologists
Finally, it is worth noting attention. Psychologists believe that if a man lives at the expense of a woman and openly takes money from her, sooner or later it will affect sex. Why? Because money is energy. Force. And she attracts. A man takes money from his lady, without earning at the same time? This means that he automatically makes a source of energy and strength out of his woman. And she, without realizing it, tries on the role of a man.
After some time, the woman begins to feel it. She feels like a head, leader, boss. And not only in life - in bed, too. She ceases to feel tender and fragile. No longer feels the need for care, love and protection. She ceases to be a woman next to her man, begins to realize this fact. And in the end, the question arises: what is the meaning of these relations?