Almost every adult has heard about swing at least once in a life when there are more than two people in bed. However, in the classical sense, this is an exchange of partners between two married couples. How to become a swinger, where to find partners and is it considered a betrayal? We will reveal an intimate curious topic.
Swing is ...
New forms of sexuality are borrowed from other cultures and widely distributed. There is no active swing movement in Russia today, but official statistics are not an indicator. A section called “A couple is looking for a couple” has long appeared on dating sites. What is at stake is not difficult to guess.
The concept of “swinger” is borrowed from the jazz “swing”, which means a quick jump from one note to another. In the case of swing - from one partner to another.
How do you become swingers? They say that love lives for three years. What about passion? It often subsides in the first year of marriage. What to do?
Many fold their wings and put up with a monotonous life, someone seeks diversity on the side, and still others plunge into the swing, motivating the salvation of a sinking family boat.
In a man there is always a male impulse. Fear and competition do not keep up (! Not with time), but with impulse. By nature, a man is polygamous. Swing is like a spontaneous search for a new form of family existence.
Swingers are often confused with group sex participants. This opinion is erroneous. Swingers are always couples.
Where did the swing come from?
Initially, swing implied the exchange of wives. With increasing popularity, this phenomenon was first noticed in 1950.
Swing was invented by US military pilots during World War II. They had enough finance to support their families near military bases. Mortality was high, which is why pilots began to have conflicting social relations. An intimate relationship took place between the pilots themselves and between their wives. This trend continued until the end of the Korean War - until 1953.
There is another version: swinging arose in Czechoslovakia during socialism. This phenomenon has spread in California by American hippies. Fear of contracting AIDS or HIV did not stop couples from trying to diversify their relationships.
In the years 60-70, the concept of "Swedish family" appeared. Radical youth, in contrast to the traditional idea of a family, arranged a “love triangle”. Swedish swingers are grouped by this criterion: man + man + woman or man + woman + woman.
The motto of the swinging communities: “Deliver the world from AIDS.” This is their main principle. Swingers believe that the partner will not receive sexual satisfaction on the side, but will receive sexual pleasure with another trusted couple. The basis is safe sex.
Today, swinging in Russia is the lot of big cities such as Moscow, St. Petersburg, Nizhny Novgorod. Here, every 20 couples are swingers. Every 12 tried once a swinger sexual relationship. According to stubborn statistics, the number of swingers is growing by 1% every year. The metropolis is the place of distribution of this unusual phenomenon.
Swinger Rules
Due to the masculine nature, there are unspoken rules in the swingers community.
- A female swinger does not have the right to meet with a stranger male swinger in private. The reason is pretty clear: a man is afraid of comparing with someone else, especially if it comes to sex life.
- Swingers are not attached to each other: strangers husband or wife remain strangers. You can only “borrow” another partner in the presence of his half.
- The swing game between couples lasts up to 6 months. Often, acquaintance takes place in society, and not by announcements. Beaches, parties are typical places for couples to swing.
Despite all the so-called swinging rules, no one is immune from treason. In an unusual situation, sometimes feelings are taken up. Many couples diverge and begin to build relationships with a partner from the swing movement: it turns out a vicious circle.
Is swing a betrayal?
According to statistics, about 20% of couples at least once practiced swing. 40% of free people dreamed of trying to let a secret connection into their life, like Pandora’s box. In swinger circles, this activity is not considered cheating. Partners know (and often see) with whom and what their second half is busy with.
Swing formats
Swing is divided into several curious forms. So, the main ones:
- light swing - physical adultery is not implied. Only mutual caresses are acceptable, satisfying the desire to be with someone else, but not with your partner. It turns out a kind of "misconception";
- soft swing - having sex in close proximity to each other, but not exchanging partners;
- closed swing implies physical intimacy. Couples exchange partners and disperse in different rooms. Often, a closed form of swing is preferred by couples who have a desire to try physical proximity with someone on the side;
- open form of swing - couples have sex together. Swingers believe that this is how their energy comes out.
In a sense, an open form of swing can be called an orgy.
Is it worth a try?
Why become swingers? The main reason is to refresh feelings in family relationships and gain a new sexual experience. At the same time, it is generally accepted that betrayal does not occur. Since there is no deception of his second half. Physical proximity occurs with the consent of a loved one. Paradoxically? To a certain degree. People with stereotyped thinking will never understand the logic of swingers.
According to statistics, almost everyone has an erotic cherished fantasy. The format is: He + She + She.
Some girls present such an extravagant gift to their beloved man. Manifestation of male jealousy is excluded. But the jealousy of a woman is more than likely.
Another combination: He + He + She.
Only non-jealous men can agree to this format. However, it is possible that after an intimate experiment reproaches and jealousy will begin.
Classic swing version “pair + pair”.
Both partners are in equal position.
How to choose the best partners?
If both partners decide to become swingers, the question arises: "Where to find another pair?" First of all, you need to understand how you are both willing to experiment in an intimate way. Just want to warn women for whom a partner is valuable. Sexologists give a few "instructions":
- Do not persuade a couple with whom you are friends of families to swing. If someone doesn't like something - friendship apart. There is a high probability that common friends recognize. Moreover, it will be difficult to relax with people with whom you have been communicating for a long time, and you will continue to continue friendly communication;
- Do not mess with your ex and their new partners. In any case, jealousy will appear. It is difficult to look at your partner in the arms of his ex-girlfriend and at the same time understand that they were once connected by more than one juicy experiment.
How to become a swinger with your wife and find partners? In Europe, there are swing clubs. They consist of swingers who want to find partners. In Russia, such closed clubs appeared relatively recently.
How to become a swinger? Go to the swing party! They are arranged in various formats. Here, on-site contact information is collected. You can come absolutely anonymously and try the forbidden fruit.
It is likely that you will never meet your swing partners again. It’s like in a train car: they talked and never met again. Anonymity in such specific clubs is strictly monitored.
How to become a swinger yet? Get into your favorite Internet.
There are special dating sites for swingers. There is only one risk: at the meeting you can get quite what you expected. Moreover, wide publicity is no exception.
Opinions
Scientists note that polygamous nature remains polygamous. Marital long life is impossible without physical adultery. Of course, betrayal always involves fraud, at least for a while, because sooner or later everything secret becomes clear.
Swing is a kind of legalized form of betrayal, and honesty remains in the couple, but the natural polygamy does not break.
On one site (for ethical reasons, we won’t publish the name), swingers answer the question "How did we become swingers?" For example, swingers believe that they will soon find gender equality. They believe that the wishes of the partner must be treated with respect and understanding. Swing is a special art, which is understood only for those couples who set themselves the goal of building integral trusting relationships.
Often swingers share their stories in specialized forums under the general heading titled "How My Wife and I Swinger." One representative of the Hungarian community says that he and his wife took the path to swinging for about five years. Before the wedding, there were speculations that other men could excite the spouse, but something happened that he could not even imagine: the spouse was excited by the absolutely opposite men. It turns out that the wife had long dreamed of trying a swing with another man, but she was afraid to admit for a long time - she thought she might offend, so she was silent. True, after she tried swinging with the man of her dreams, her interest subsided, he simply became uninteresting to her. But swing is swing. In a marriage with one person, there is rarely a place for experimentation, and swing is a springboard for the realization of one's sexual fantasies. This is also necessary and important.
Sexologists say: if a married couple was close to divorce, but chose swinging to save their family boat, she would break up anyway. And those couples who dreamed of knowing the depth of their relationship and engaged in swinging, found it.