Sex in a relationship is important, as well as emotional conversation, romance, a joint solution to domestic issues. But sometimes problems begin in a relationship, which is why, first of all, an intimate life collapses. In this article we will tell you how to persuade your wife to have sex, why a beloved and once passionate woman avoids intimacy and refuses her.
Introduction
The main problem in the relationship, why a woman loses all interest in sex, is dissatisfaction with sex. Unlike men, for which it is immediately noticeable whether they are pleasant or not during intercourse, the fair sex sometimes succeeds in deceiving their partner, imitating pleasure and orgasm. But the one-goal game cannot last long, because a woman begins to feel inferior, unsatisfied.
Sex allows you to splash out the accumulated energy, relax and protect yourself from worldly concerns, but in most cases, girls just have to endure, to please their husband, but not get anything in return.
Serious problem
When the husband and wife have problems in bed, they must be addressed immediately, because this is evidence that the marriage is beginning to crumble. Of course, sex is not the main thing, but intimate life is important in a relationship. Firstly, because it is a way to trust each other, and the absence of tenderness, affection and touch indicates that a thick wall appears between the husband and wife that cannot be pierced. Secondly, sexual life is a great way to get away from all everyday problems, relax and enjoy each other's warmth. In other words, a simple coitus should not overshadow the romance, conversations, joint activities and attention, but at the same time it should not be forgotten and ignored.
Main reasons
- Problems between husband and wife arise when the fair sex woman feels unsatisfied. In this case, both may be to blame. Husband, because he does not seek to give pleasure to his beloved, but only requires attention to himself. Wife, because she does not want to become more feminine and sexy, choosing old grandmother's leggings, washed clothes and stretched T-shirts, which treacherously tell about what the girl was preparing for dinner.
- Your wife is really tired. Men tirelessly love to repeat that the 21st century has removed all obligations from a woman, and all that remains for her is to sit on social networks and enjoy a soft sofa. But even the presence of a dishwasher and washing machine does not save the girl from raising children, preparing dishes, resolving household issues, because most men limit their activities only to work and reproaches, that the fair sex has nothing to get tired of.
- When you first met a girl, the relationship between you flared up in a bright flame, and after a while the bonfire began to fade. What is the matter? Perhaps you no longer excite your beloved. Analyze how your lifestyle, appearance and taste for life has changed. If a few years ago you could not live without training for a day, you could not sleep at night, rave about your dream, realize it, now, perhaps, you have got a small beer belly, and all that interests you is a trip with friends in bar, computer games and lazy homework. This does not excite women, because relationships are when a couple develops together, and if this does not happen, then one definitely begins to suffer.
In fact, there are many reasons why a wife refuses sex. This may be the birth of a child, when a new mother at a psychological level cannot even think about sex, as well as a serious quarrel or betrayal, the appearance of a third person in a relationship. But one thing is clear: when excuses or reproaches appear that men only need sex, then it is time to seriously understand the problems, because no career, domestic problems, financial distress can not interfere with a healthy and full-fledged relationship.
Method 1. Give her romance
Make your beloved an unforgettable evening, surround with attention and make it the center of a small family celebration, so that you both forget about all worldly concerns. Sometimes women really do not have a sudden candlelit dinner at home, a relaxing massage or going to a concert of her favorite group.
You should not expect that simple romantic music will liberate your beloved, especially after a long absence of sex. You may not be able to get what you are striving for, because the woman will only begin to relax. To rekindle the bonfire of passion, it is necessary to surround with attention and care more than once. And this does not sound mercantile or selfish, because many men do not understand that the lack of intimacy is a global problem that affects the deep corners of the soul of your soulmate.
It is important to understand that you need to arrange a romantic date with your wife at a time convenient for her: not after a long and exhausted work week, not after a hard day spent with young children, not during an illness. Want to do something nice? Prepare your wife for a family event in advance: send the children to grandmother or hire a nanny, help her cope with all household chores faster so that your beloved does not think about the abyss of problems in which she gets stuck more and more every day. After such romantic music, a fragrant dinner, a clean apartment, well-groomed children, a pleasant and necessary gift will do their job.
Method 2. Talk heart to heart
Usually the problem of lack of sex occurs in people who have crossed the 35-year frontier. In such cases, a man can hear that for a woman career, children, but not intimacy, are more important. In most cases, the answer to this problem is that the woman simply stopped being attracted to her husband. At the dawn of a relationship, she was in love, perhaps believed in an ideal life after marriage and was in a hurry, making any responsible decisions, but after years the passion passed, and instead of it came awareness.
In this case, the couple should talk heart to heart without hiding anything from each other. Tired of classic sex? Add colors, it can be toys, exciting lingerie, role-playing games, and even a threesome. Try and experiment, do not be afraid to trust each other and step over your principles in order to return the old fire in a relationship.
Method 3. Aids
It happens that a couple lacks that cherished spark to re-experience the passion and desire of each other. In this case, an erotic film for two will help. At night, turn on your favorite recording, you can complement the pleasant atmosphere with candles, aromatic oils with the smell of patchouli or ylang-ylang, a hot bath. A gentle massage, a glass of hot wine helps to relax and position the girl.
Of course, before you persuade your wife to have sex in this way, you need to discuss which genre of erotic film to include. Do not be shy if your beloved likes BDSM or a video featuring several girls.
Method 4. Pay attention to health
As a rule, when a wife refuses sex, men begin to look for love and tenderness on the side. But first of all, it is worth understanding the true causes of such coldness. Often the problem is solved by going to the gynecologist and endocrinologist, prescribing certain medications.
How to persuade a wife to have sex, which refuses not only sex, but also ordinary affection? Contact a sexologist, undergo a complete physical examination, pass all the necessary tests and convince your beloved that this is necessary not only to increase libido and desire, but also for her physical and psychological health. Usually the reason lies in the endocrine system and gynecology. For example, the cause of this may be chronic infectious diseases, inflammation of the ovaries, cysts and neoplasms, hormonal imbalance. Of course, many tests are carried out only for a fee, but the wife’s body will say “thank you” for the help and support provided.
Method 5. Psychological support
Before you learn how to persuade your wife to have sex, you need to understand why your beloved refuses to have sex. The reason can be both psychological and emotional problems that upset the balance of the fair sex.
Find out what disturbs your beloved. Perhaps she is complex about her appearance and is embarrassed to go to the gym or is worried about financial distress in the family, lack of attention from her husband and children, because of a conflict at work or the director’s pressure.
Method 6. Psychological assistance
If conversations do not help, however, like manipulations, quarrels and reproaches, then it's time to turn to a family psychologist. There are enough specialists now, especially qualified to get to the truth and eradicate the problem.
As already mentioned above, sometimes behind the rejection of intimacy is not just a revision of values and a reference to fatigue, but the problem is much more serious. After the first sessions, the psychologist will be able to detect the problem and suggest ways to solve it. But here it is very important that the husband and wife come together, become one. In order for a specialist to really be able to help, a couple needs to reveal their soul without hesitation, entrust their strangest secrets and emotional experiences to a stranger. And when solutions are found, the husband and wife should make every effort to return the former passion to the relationship.
Method 7. Eternal Conflicts
Many men wonder how to persuade their wife to have sex after a quarrel. The answer is simple: no need to persuade. If you feel guilty, then first of all it is worth apologizing, and sincerely and emotionally.
In most cases, a woman refuses to have sex, because she is corny lacking affection. Men, as a rule, are ready to attack their spouse, avoiding gentle touches, passionate kisses, languid looks. Want to get the cherished night? Turn on romantic music, start with a hug and take your time. You must completely relax yourself and the woman. Feel your body, breath, voice, vibrations.
Important information
Women who reproach their men so often must accept one truth: sex is not only the need of the body, not exercise to maintain health, not the whim of the chosen one, and certainly not his concern. Sex is an important element of relationships, however, like affection, tenderness, romance. Without sex, which can mean not only intercourse, but also quiet many hours of heart-to-heart talk, a strong family cannot be built.
When a woman refuses a man, then this is the first alarming bell that some problems have appeared. Perhaps it’s worth reconsidering your attitude to each other, to yourself, your life, children, becoming less conservative and getting rid of bigotry in order to regain your former passion.