Since childhood, each of us has certain ideas about the world, about the behavior of people in certain situations, about what is good and what is bad. Unfortunately, expectations are not always realized. People are forced to adapt to society so as not to be rejected by them.
What is the expectation?
Waiting is a feeling of the possible embodiment of ideas in the future. Most often, a person is not ready to put up with the fact that his expectations could not be met, since he had already thought through how everything should be, and believed that this is exactly what would happen. For people, expectation is something bright, right, indestructible. Especially when it comes to such important aspects as family, friends, work. Unjustified expectations are always accompanied by disappointment and rejection. A state of expectation is also a complex and debilitating process that can lead to depression.
How to deal with disappointment?
The most effective way is to eliminate the cause of disappointment, that is, you should just stop setting yourself up for a specific outcome. But how to do that? For this:
- Make it easier to relate to any situation. For example, a friend refused to go to your birthday party. Find out the reason and try to understand it. Try to put yourself in his place and think about what you would do in such a situation. Ask yourself: “Will it be important for me in 5 years?”. If not, do not focus your attention on this.
- Accept people for who they are.
- Try to be tolerant of shortcomings, because everyone has them. Do not be angry at excessive straightforwardness, talkativeness, stiffness and other personality traits of a person.
- Do not exhaust yourself with thoughts of what you want. So it will be more difficult for you to come to terms with the opposite reality.
- Do not rush things. Sometimes, in order to achieve the desired, you need to wait a bit and get distracted.
What to do to meet expectations?
Sometimes just sitting idly by and waiting for everything to happen by itself is not enough. There is always the opportunity to influence certain events, as human expectations are a regulated mechanism.
- If you are waiting for a promotion, try to work better, do not be afraid to take on an unnecessary task, as it will provide you with invaluable experience, talk with your bosses.
- If you can’t wait for a marriage proposal, carefully hint about it, show patience, show your feelings so that your young man understands that he is dear to you and decides to start a family with you.
- If your relationship has become monotonous, try to revive it yourself. Buy theater or movie tickets, have a surprise, or take a break together.
- If there are disagreements in the family, try to calmly discuss the problem with relatives, listen to them, express your point of view, explain the advantages of your arguments, try to find a compromise.
How to meet the expectations of others?
In an effort to change everything around people often do not notice their own imperfections. Rarely think about what they themselves could change for the better. Therefore, expectation is conformity to one's own requirements. Tips to help you stay on top:
- Be interested in the topic of conversation.
- If something doesn’t suit you, say so right away.
- Be yourself.
- Highlight your weaknesses and try to reduce their manifestation.
- If you do not understand something, ask.
- Try not to start a conversation about things that you don’t understand or doubt.
- Learn to listen.
- Be polite.
Tips to help improve relationships with loved ones:
- Do not forget to take care of relatives.
- Help them even if they don’t ask for help.
- Congratulate them on the holidays.
- Keep in touch.
- Share your concerns with them.
Expectations are a tricky thing, before blaming someone for not meeting your expectations, consider whether your requirements are too high or whether a specific person is able to fulfill them. Even if you are not understood, do not be offended, all people tend to make mistakes, none of us are perfect. Try to share your dreams and goals with loved ones, and then to achieve the desired will be much easier.