Man in this world is always alone. Even those people who have a family and children can be lonely. The fact is that the internal state is less dependent on the environment. And male loneliness is a conscious or unconscious choice of a person. A self-sufficient person with strong life beliefs will never feel alone. What is the reason for mental decline and how to get rid of oppressive feelings, read below.
Male loneliness
Someone might think that loneliness is a temporary physical absence of close-minded people in spirit. But actually it is not. The male opinion about loneliness is this: a person who knows what he wants, has unwavering life values and knows the value of his words, will not feel lonely. Only that person who is torn apart by spiritual torment and who does not know how to properly manage her own life will be tormented by the search for the meaning of her existence. A person needs support and support nearby. But the personality must be complete in itself. It is not necessary to search for the meaning of life in someone. A person who does not find much pleasure in the time spent in his society should understand that the rest with such a person will be bored. Therefore, do not get rid of loneliness, filling it with another person. First you need to solve all your internal problems and only then look for a person with a similar system of interests and values.
pros
Many men do not mind staying lonely for some time. Up to 30 years, young people prefer to remain in the status of a bachelor and build a career. What are the advantages of male loneliness?
- The freedom of action. Men love to be masters of their lives. They like freedom, which opens up many possibilities. Do not have to think about someone else's desires, except their own.
- Lack of responsibility. Another advantage of male loneliness is the ability not to think about anyone other than yourself. Responsibility for the family is simply unthinkable for many people in their 20s. You need to gain experience in order to be able to conduct their business and make the right decisions.
- An opportunity to build a career. Male loneliness is good when it benefits. The ability to devote all your time to building a career is very important. A person who will arrange things before the creation of a family will be able to achieve more than an individual who will arrange things with an encumbrance in the form of a wife and children.
Minuses
Men can enjoy life only when they are self-sufficient. But to find yourself, you need to go through a thorny path. And not everyone can go through life alone. What are the disadvantages of loneliness?
- There is no person with whom to share the joy of victory. The woman’s role in male loneliness is far from the last. A girl for a man is not only a lover, but also a best friend. A man should know that they admire his success, and idolize his person. In this case, he will be more happy to conquer new peaks. If the chosen one ignores his achievements and successes, then even walking hand in hand with such a lady, a man can remain alone.
- The thought of your inferiority. A man who does not have a lady of the heart begins to doubt his superiority. The young man is always encouraged by women's admiring glances and thoughts that his candidacy is in demand among the beautiful half of humanity.
- Boring leisure. Entertainment is an integral part of any person’s life. Spending your leisure time alone is boring. The absence of a constant partner deprives a person of not only spiritual, but also carnal joys.
The root of the problem
How to overcome male loneliness? The psychological advice given by experts comes down to one simple thought: in order to eliminate the effect, you need to find the reason. A person who cannot get rid of an oppressive feeling must understand why it arises in his soul. It is foolish to think that the right girl will solve all the problems. The root of loneliness lies deep inside. A person who is busy with what he loves, has good friends, can support any conversation, will be successful with women. A reserved men who are afraid in the company of beautiful ladies to open their mouths will cause pity, but not admiration. There are many poems about male loneliness. They reflect the essence of the problems of a strong half of humanity. Men are too often afraid to show the world their true emotions.
If you suffer from loneliness, think about whether everything is so good in your life, as you think. Take a simple test. Draw a circle and divide it into 6 parts. Designate each part in accordance with the main areas of life: health, career, friends, love, family, leisure. Put a point in each sphere as close to the outer circle as you develop this or that area of life. Ideally, you should get an even circle. If you have a spider, then you can easily understand what sphere of life you need to develop in order to get rid of internal inferiority.
All problems from childhood
You can see photos of male loneliness in expensive glossy magazines. Even successful and beautiful people do not feel self-sufficient. Why? All human problems lie in his childhood. Think about the relationship your family had when you were little. How you were brought up, how dad treated your mother. If the father beat his mother, scolded her all the time and said that all the women were fools, the boy involuntarily believed this statement. Growing up, the man began to seek confirmation in the words of his father. And he who seeks will always find. It is not surprising that a young and handsome guy will remain lonely if he constantly tries to find flaws in any of the attractive girls.
The situation becomes even more difficult if the boy had no father in his childhood. The role of the main man in life could be taken by one of the relatives. Involuntarily making the idol of the person who was the educator, the boy could grab his life beliefs. And it is difficult to get rid of a feeling of inferiority for a child who grew up in an incomplete family. From childhood, the boy understood that not all families live peacefully and that divorce is completely natural. In such a situation, you need to independently or with the help of a psychologist get rid of the statements inherent in infancy, rewriting them to new ones.
Low self-esteem
What is the reason for male loneliness? Psychologists argue that those members of the stronger sex who suffer from low self-esteem are more likely to experience loneliness. Men consider themselves unworthy of love. A girl will not be able to love a man who considers himself unworthy of her. Moreover, the guy can subconsciously inspire the beloved confidence that she is amazing and can find someone better.
To change the situation, the guy must reconsider his attitude to himself. Moreover, the changes should not be external, but internal. But if a man does not like his appearance, first of all you need to do it. Everyone knows that they are met by clothes. A fat man should lose weight, a guy who dresses in rags should look through glossy magazines and find out about current trends. Changing your clothes and pumping up the body, you can proceed to the study of internal qualities. You should write down your strengths and weaknesses on the sheet, and then get rid of the shortcomings.
Hobby
What is one of the reasons for male loneliness? In the presence of a large amount of free time. A person who is constantly engaged in self-flagellation has a clear excess of time that can be spent on self-development. The guy should come up with an activity that will captivate him. It can be sports training, design, programming or education. A person who is busy will not cheat himself and think about his own insolvency. An enthusiastic person will be interesting not only to himself, but also to others. If a guy does not have a couple, then he can easily find a girl by going to a club of interest. For example, a man who is keen on reading can enroll in a literary club. From time to time, attending events at which different people will gather in order to discuss books, a guy will be able to find a lady who shares his interests.
Life goals
Anyone should know where he is going. If a guy has no plans, his future will seem very muddy to him. And this fact will oppress a person. Male loneliness after 30 years is found in insolvent men who have no idea why they came to this world. A person who learns something new every day and strives to realize his plans will be passionate about life. Loneliness will not accompany such a person. A person who communicates daily with several dozen people can easily find a soul mate.
If you still do not have the goal of life, then it's time to find it. Sit down and write down everything you ever wanted to do. Remember all your dreams - big and small. You will disassemble them later. If you already know exactly who you want to become, then do not delay the implementation of the plan for a long time. Sign up for appropriate courses where you will receive the necessary skills to achieve your goal. And small dreams can become vacation plans. Do not be afraid to take risks and do crazy things. They will help you gain the necessary experience and become an interesting person.
Significant other
Man attracts those people whom he deserves. And this is not some kind of prophecy, but a real fact. A person always chooses his surroundings from a type that he considers pretty. Male loneliness is an indicator of poor choice. But if a person does not change, then time after time he will step on the same rake. You probably noticed that most men choose the girls of the same type. And this applies not only to appearance. For example, someone is attracted to a bitchy character, while someone is attracted to reverence and obedience. Someone likes bright girls, and someone prefers modest persons. It is worth remembering that if you make the same choice all the time, it makes no sense to wait for different results. If a man was burned about a girl who preferred a free relationship, then there is no point in getting on the same rake. It is better to look for a lady who wants to start a family, rather than a person who is eager to walk and get a lot of new experiences. Always consciously approach the choice of a girl. The lady should be attractive not only outside but also inside. You need to pay attention to the interests and values of the lady. If they match yours, consider that you made the right choice. But relations are not so simple. Finding the right person is not enough. One must be able to support love and make concessions.
Friends
Male loneliness is not only the absence of a second half. A person will not feel lonely if close friends are with him. Any man should have at least two friends with whom he can talk heart to heart, discuss his problems and seek advice. There may be many friends in life, but best friends should be chosen with particular care. These should be time-tested people who can be relied on and who can be trusted with their secrets. It is said that male friendships are safer than female ones. You will have to verify this yourself. And in order not to be convinced of the incorrectness of the saying, think about who you admit to your circle of friends.
Can I live without friends? It is possible, but difficult. If a person does not have close friends, he will feel loneliness more clearly than if he does not have a second half. A girl can not always share male interests, and not all thoughts can be told to her. Therefore, timely take care of finding like-minded people, because every year it will be more and more difficult to find friends.
A family
The person you love is always striking. If a man has a loving family, then he will never suffer from loneliness. And this applies not only to the wife and children, but also to parents and relatives. A man should maintain normal relations with his mother, father, brothers and sisters. It is these people who will love a person not for any achievements, but for the very fact of his existence. Male loneliness is the absence of a number of like-minded people and loved ones. But you do not always need to look for love on the side. It can be found in the family. Whatever the parents, they are the one and only. They always want children happiness and are ready to sacrifice their interests for their benefit. Sisters and brothers are best friends who sometimes know you even better than you do. Close people will help in a difficult situation, they will always give good advice and will not go too intrusively into your life. The care and attention that the family shows to your candidacy should be appreciated. If a man sacrifices normal relations with relatives for the sake of a girl, this will come back to him many times. You can change the lady’s heart, but you can’t find a replacement for your parents. Always keep that in mind.