Can't imagine how to survive a breakup with a loved one? This is especially difficult to do if you have lived side by side for many years. Separating after a year of living together is also difficult, but this is not the same as being abandoned after 15 years of marriage. Life is adjusted, children grow up, and against this background, the family collapses. It is especially scary when one of the partners is happy with everything, and he does not want to give a divorce. What to do in this case, how to survive the betrayal and how not to lose yourself, read below.
Understand why it all happened
Before you understand how to survive a breakup with your loved one, you need to calm down and think. Why did this all happen? Did everything suit you? And why didn’t suit the partner? Perhaps love has cooled, but there is no romance in a relationship. But you do not need it. You went head first to your problems, to raising children, and spend all your free time with your parents. Well, can anyone like this way of life? The partner also needs love, and does not want to be abandoned.
There is never a consequence without a cause. Therefore, before taking any steps, you need to understand why the ship crashed. Indeed, otherwise it will be impossible to eliminate the leak. If you do not understand yourself, then it will be difficult for you to build a new relationship and restore confidence in the opposite sex. If you cannot understand why you were abandoned, although you spent a week on this issue, ask your friends or friends for advice. From the side you know better. Let them tell you how they saw your relationship. You may learn a lot.
How to bridge a gap that didn’t happen on one’s own initiative
People are more worried when they are abandoned. And this is even if the relationship has already run dry and both partners understand that parting is the only way out. If you are abandoned, the soul remains a residue. You think that one could still save past feelings and inflame love.
How to survive a breakup with a loved one? If you are abandoned, you need to understand that intimacy with your ex is no longer possible. Why? Because no sane person can forgive betrayal. If you are abandoned, you are forgiven and agreed, your partner will have no problem leaving you again. After all, he already has experience in this matter, and knows that you are a kind-hearted person. Yes, it’s hard to believe that your love turned out to be fragile. But nothing can be done about it. Gluing glass does not make sense. You should move on with your head held high.
How to bridge the gap if you were the initiator
Even if the point in the relationship is set by one’s own hand, it can be difficult to understand that they are finished. Everything does not collapse overnight. So, in any case, a person will be mentally prepared for parting. Well, at least that person who knows how to observe and think.
How to survive a breakup with a loved one? If the initiative came from you, then there was a reason. Here it is not worth forgetting. Perhaps in a week, you will regret the decision made and want to return. But this cannot be done. Have pride and do not play with other people's feelings. You left your partner for good reason, and do not rebuke yourself for this. Feeling guilty is a bad companion. If you cannot keep in mind the reasons for the break, copy them to a piece of paper. And every time you want to return the novel, even in your memories, go to the list and read the points.
How do women feel?
Girls are more sensitive creatures than men. And mental torment, as a result of this, torment them more. Women resort to this technique: they gather all their friends and begin to tell them which men are heartless. Moreover, all those gathered begin to echo the frustrated lady that the way it is, and you can’t rely on the stronger sex. After such support, the woman becomes easier. She understands that in this world she is not alone. After this ritual, the woman becomes depressed. It seems to her that the best part of life is already behind, that her true love is lost. The period of self-flagellation begins, and good memories fly by a kaleidoscope before your eyes.
How to survive the pain of parting with your loved one? After the two main stages of separation are completed, the woman decides to change her image and start a new life. This is a very good idea. The girl goes to the hairdresser, then for shopping, and then takes her friends and goes to a club or restaurant to flirt with men and raise her self-esteem.
How do men feel
Strong sex does not show their emotions. Men are restrained and, perhaps, it is from this that they more often suffer from nervous disorders. Guys do not talk to friends and acquaintances. They keep the pain and resentment in themselves, trying to push it into the far corner of their soul and close it there. To drown out the loss, a man tries to replace his beloved girl with the first one, who has successfully turned up. But such novels can only do much harm. After all, a man will not experience deep feelings, but will only feel moral satisfaction from the fact that he can fall in love with pretty women.
How to survive a breakup with a loved one to a man? The best solution is to turn your attention to other areas of life. If the floor under your feet collapses, you should switch to a flat and hard surface. If you have a stable job, loyal friends and family support you, breaking up will be easy. Just switch to parenting, think about work projects, or take a trip. Get distracted and relax, it helps to restore strength and regain a positive attitude.
What do psychologists think
How is it easier to survive a breakup with a loved one? Experts are sure that after parting, in any case, there is a precipitate. And do not be shy. But blame yourself is not worth it. Most of the girl, after breaking up, wonder what I did wrong. And it can hit self-esteem hard. Especially if you look around, and look at the marriages of happy friends. Do not think that all is well. People swear, just some can put up with other people's flaws, while others can’t. You are a good person and must understand this. If your partner does not appreciate you, this does not mean that you will not be able to find someone who will be interested in you.
What do psychologists think? How to survive a breakup with a loved one? This is an occasion to raise your self-esteem and change something in life. But in no case should you delete your former love from your memory. Do not delete photos, do not throw things away. This is a part of your life. Yes, maybe not the happiest. But when a child corrects a bad grade in the diary, he still understands that she remained in the journal. Do not be such a child. It should be understood that everyone makes mistakes. Today it will hurt, and tomorrow you can look at the joint pictures from the trip with a smile.
What can not be done
How to safely end parting with a loved one? You need to understand that in order to let go of something, you should first break all ties. Do not call your former love, do not look for meetings, do not chase and do not go to the page on social networks. Do not drag your soul. Let everything settle down. Well, will it really be easier for you if you find out that your ex-lover has a new passion? And if you found out about a new girl, and if she turned out to be your friend? In no case do not call her and do not threaten her. This will not lead to anything good. Revenge is a feeling that a self-respecting person should not experience.
Do not talk about your break. You can tell colleagues and friends that you broke up, but try to save face. No need to say that your ex was cruel. Remember that your lost love is your choice and must be respected, even if it was wrong.
What can i do
How to quickly survive a breakup with a loved one? Try not to lose face. No matter how difficult it is for you, do not get depressed. Remember, psychologists say that our outer life is a reflection of our inner being. And if this statement works in one direction, then it can also be used in the opposite direction. Dress well, go to the hairdresser, beautician and sign up for the gym. So you can quickly overcome depression. You can cry at home in the pillow, but do not forget that life is on, and time will not wait until you get around.
Change the image. Yes, you cannot start life from a new sheet, and you should not throw out memories from it. Indeed, among them are many good. But a new hairstyle or beautiful shoes can cheer you up and improve your well-being.
Advice
How to survive a breakup with a loved one? Tips might be:
- Do not start a new novel immediately after the old. Let time pass and passions calm down. Your mind will become clear and your heart will be open. In this state, you can fall in love again.
- New hobbies. Do you have a dream? Maybe you always wanted to learn how to draw or play the guitar. Love left you and freed up a lot of free time. Spend it on yourself. Create, dance, make music, swim or just go for a walk. Engage in what brings you pleasure and frees the mind.
- Travel One of the best ways to forget anything is to go to another country.
New impressions, discoveries and emotions will help to forget past grievances and troubles. You will rest, gain new strength and be able to look into the eyes of your former love without resentment and fear.