Problems in life arise in the life of every person constantly, but, unfortunately, not everyone can cope with them. There are those who prefer a quiet battle in a trench to a heroic battle, expecting that the enemy will leave on his own or someone will come to the defense. This position is fundamentally wrong, and such an approach to problems must be resolutely fought.
Specialists in human psychology know how to solve problems instead of hiding from them or waiting for someone to solve them for us. In view of the growing general stressfulness of modern life, psychologists are willing to share valuable advice with others on how to overcome life's difficulties. All of them agree that each person should at all costs learn to independently solve the problems that arise.
Identify a specific problem and its importance
Loss of keys and dismissal from work, tooth loss and amputation of a leg can be considered a problem . Sometimes a person can write down into a category of problems a life situation that he has never encountered and which forces him to unusual actions, knocking him out of the psychological zone of comfort. Therefore, before driving yourself into stress, it is worth considering whether the problem is far-fetched.
At the same time, it is important to clearly highlight existing problems. You may even have to make a list with them. The next thing to do is determine the weight and urgency of solving each problem. It is important to understand which ones should be resolved in the first place and which ones can wait. You should not rush to solve everything in one fell swoop, as you may simply not have enough strength for this, and the quality of such a solution will greatly decrease.
Develop the right look
Once the true problems are identified and the order of their resolution is built, it is necessary to proceed to the next step - the formation of a correct look at them. Of course, the complexity of situations can be different, however, before proceeding with the resolution of each of them, you need to think about what is useful to take out of it. It sounds strange? Not at all.
The solution to each problem requires you to manifest one or several qualities at once. Therefore, the development or training of certain character traits can be considered a positive moment of each of them. Moreover, in difficult situations, we can become more active and quick-witted, we learn to think and behave outside the box. According to scientists, a way out of a psychologically comfortable zone is the best path for personal growth for a person.
Pacify emotions and make a plan
Before solving problems, you need to pacify your emotions. Panic and anger do not allow us to soberly assess the situation and our actions; under the influence of feelings, we tend to act illogically. Almost everyone who at least once made a decision on emotions instantly, then more than once regretted it.
To successfully solve various problems in life, it is necessary to draw up a detailed plan of their actions. It is worth starting to compile it immediately after the emotions have calmed down and the ability to think soundly and rationally has returned. Do not forget that the plan to overcome the problem is just an outline consisting of the proposed actions. It is necessary to tune in advance that it will have to be corrected. Moreover, this can happen both before the beginning of its implementation, and during this.
Fight the fear of failure
Often the biggest obstacle to solving problems is fear. It paralyzes and prevents you from clearly seeing the picture of what is happening. Usually, we are most afraid of failure, it scares us that the plan drawn up will be completely disastrous or additional unexpected difficulties will arise. How to solve the problem associated with your own fear?
First, try not to get hung up on the idea that something will not work. Drive these thoughts as the worst enemy. There is only one way to overcome fear - by accepting it and doing what you fear. Try to fantasize in the opposite direction. Imagine that everything worked out for you, feel in your imagination a taste of success and satisfaction that you have achieved your goal, and the problem is left behind.
Arm yourself with advice
To understand how to solve problems yourself, it will be useful in some situations to talk about what torments you to those you trust. Sometimes this alone can help, because while you will explain the essence of what is happening, highlighting the main thing and trying to convey it to the listener in a clear language, everything will become clear in your head and settle down in places. It is possible that after that you will suddenly be struck by a decision.
If this does not happen, then a loved one who you devoted to the essence of your problem, firstly, can help you emotionally, and secondly, can give you advice full of love and sympathy. It would be especially good if this person ever faced a similar problem in his life. Or maybe you can find someone who can provide practical assistance ?,
Imagine your wreck
The great psychologist Dale Carnegie advises to look into her eyes to get rid of the panic fear of failure. In other words, you need to believe in success, but at the same time it is clear that no one in this world is completely safe from anything. Why think about failure, isn't that discouraging?
Dale Carnegie explains this by saying that in a problem situation, for many, a fiasco means the end of life. They are panicky afraid even for a moment to imagine that everything will end in the worst way for them, and they have no idea how they will live after that. According to the psychologist, having thought over his actions in advance in case everything goes wrong, as we hope, we protect ourselves from a panic fear of such a turn of events and do not get completely at a loss if everything happens.
Rate the problem globally
When you need to solve a problem, try to look at it from a different angle. For example, if you have nothing to put on, look at your problem through the eyes of a legless cripple. And if you are upset because you have a falling out with your husband, look at your problem with the gaze of a recently widowed woman. If you are not comfortable with the quality of your life, go to the cemetery. Gloomy? Believe me, this will help to at least slightly move your problem from a central place in your life.
And you can try this way - look at the Earth, at yourself and at your problem from space. Can you imagine how small she will seem then? Imagination, it turns out, can be used for such useful purposes. Still, when the problem arose puts too much pressure on us, you can try to imagine how we will remember it in a year or five years. Maybe then it will turn into a fun story from a life that we will amuse our friends with?
Do not forget about the rest and do not "sawdust"
Psychologists who know better than others how to solve problems with the least loss for themselves, advise not to forget that the body always needs rest. Undergoing stress, which absorbs the lion's share of the energy produced by the body, a person loses strength. To add their number will help a full physical and emotional rest.
Particularly weakening people are constant regrets about something that caused the problem or prevented it from being successfully overcome. It’s not worthwhile to “cut sawdust”, that is, return thoughts to the past again and again in order to regret it properly. It makes no sense. If your urgent problem concerns something that cannot be changed in any way, try to distract from it and not scroll it constantly in your head. You won’t affect what happened, but your thoughts can even affect what can happen to your health.
Armed with the advice of specialists, you can safely engage in battle with your problems. It would be foolish to expect some kind of miraculous end to this fight, but the fact that thanks to the correct approach the problems will be solved much easier can be counted on without a doubt. Remember, everyone is able to solve their problems on their own, and no one is set to do this dirty work for you.