Have you ever thought about how strong threads we are connected with all that surrounds us? We spend our whole lives trying to strengthen or weaken these ties. In psychology, the term “relationship” is used to define them. This is something without which our existence in society is impossible, therefore it is necessary to know all the nuances of building relationships. You should also be able to overcome problems in their structure.
What is a relationship?
On the one hand, the term "relationship" is understandable to every child, because the baby from the moment of birth is learning to build them. But on the other hand, they are a very subtle substance that cannot be felt or seen.
If we combine all the descriptions in the books on psychology, then we can say that the relationship is a collection of relationships between all the people around us. Every person with whom we have to contact becomes involved in a complex system. It can be short-term, as with random acquaintances. But, for example, we have long-term relationships with parents. They constantly evolve and last a lifetime, until the death of any of the participants.
Value
Man cannot exist without relationships. From early childhood, they become an important stage in its development and formation as a person. The human subconscious has a craving for relationships. We are in dire need of friends and lovers, we need their approval and recognition. Knowing another person, we better know ourselves and our inner world. This gives us strength to achieve our goals and creative development.
Psychologists have proved that problems in relationships are solved primarily through changes in oneself. If you change your inner attitude to the world, then the connection with it will be completely different. This allows the connections to be in constant motion and stop, reaching certain stages.
Relationships: a general principle of formation
Interpersonal relationships are formed at the level of emotional empathy and community of interests. Initially, they are built from any contact and interaction of people, and subsequently affect any joint activity.
Moreover, relationships have the principle of selectivity. They are always brightly colored and depend on the sphere of needs of the participants in these relations. That is, each participant in the relationship pursues their goals and needs in them. If they coincide, then until the realization of these goals or until their change, the relationship will exist and develop.
Types of relationships: characteristics and description
Wherever a person appears, relationships are formed between people. Even a fleeting meeting and brief communication are interpreted in this way. Based on this, they can be divided into two large groups:
Business relationships stem from a specific activity and are often supported by it. They are controlled by legal norms, less often such relations are regulated by moral and ethical standards. Personal relationships are based on personality traits and likes. They are regulated only by moral standards and have a complex structure.
Each type of relationship has its own characteristics. But each person is equally drawn into business and personal relationships. Moreover, psychologists note the relationship between the ability to build personal relationships and career success, which directly depends on the atmosphere in a separate group based on specific activities.
Relationship system
Relations have their own clear structure, which in some sources is called a system. It can be represented as follows:
1. First contact. During the meeting between people, there is an active interaction on a subconscious level. Most of the information that will determine how pleasant or unpleasant the interlocutor is to us gets into our brain in the first minutes of communication. In this time period, the interlocutor’s assessment of many parameters and the determination of the similarity or difference in attitudes and goals fit in.
2. Friendship. If the first contact was successful and repeated, then friendships are formed between the partners . They are that transitional stage, which can last for years and not grow into anything else. In a friendly relationship, their participants are closely connected at an emotional and rational level. They have common interests, the similarity of life positions and actively exchange emotions, receiving and giving the necessary energy. But in a similar system of relationships, both partners feel completely free and unconnected.
3. Friendlies. This system of relationships implies a deeper penetration into each other's world. Both participants trust each other, participate in all matters and always render feasible support.
These three stages of the system are absolutely all people involved in the process. In the future, the development of relationships goes along a multivariate branch of opportunities. They can become purely businesslike or develop into intimate ones. In any case, it all starts with the first stages described above.
How are they developing?
Keep in mind that relationships cannot but develop. They are a dynamic substance that is constantly in motion. This is the main characteristic of absolutely any relationship. If at some point they stop in their development, then both participants cease to feel satisfaction with them. Namely, satisfaction is the main component of relationships. In the case when they stop developing, both partners begin to look for new sources of satisfaction and comfort, that is, they enter into a new system of relationships. Moreover, this applies equally to personal and business relations.
Relationships: Problems
It is difficult to imagine interpersonal relationships not clouded by various problems. The problem of relationships seriously takes the minds of psychologists. Experts analyze them and suggest ways out of a difficult situation. The most common problem is conflicts that concern absolutely all types and categories of interpersonal relationships.
History proves to us that it is almost impossible to solve this basic problem, it existed at all times, but psychologists are able to identify its cause and work with it. The causes of conflicts, which are the main problem of relationships, can be represented as follows:
1. Obstruction in achieving the desired. If one person gets in the way of the cherished goal of another person, then their relationship becomes a serious problem. A similar scenario for the development of the conflict is possible in business relations, when different people apply for the same position or want to receive a bonus for any achievements. In personal contacts, such problems are encountered no less often.
2. Psychological differences. This problem significantly complicates the life of the participants in the relationship. They cannot come to a consensus on various issues, experience inexplicable antipathy to each other, and cannot exist in one space.
3. Wrong assessment of another person. This cause of problems is the most common. One person can attribute to another non-existent virtues and further experience disappointment from unjustified hopes. They also provoke a conflict situation and accusations against another person, they become the cause of long and protracted problems in relationships, which can lead to their complete breakdown, if this is possible in principle.
4. The real flaws. There is a category of people who are difficult to build relationships with society. They have an inert character, bringing them a lot of problems and troubles. Such people often break off relationships and do not seek to build others.
5. Misunderstanding. In relationships, quite often problems cause misunderstandings between their participants. Both people have their own opinions and cannot come to a compromise due to certain differences. The relationship between children and parents often suffer precisely from these problems. They are surmountable and solvable.
Relationships are the most important thing a person has in life. Therefore, it is worth cherishing them and competently building them so that you do not have to suffer from their loss in the future.