In various explanatory dictionaries, trust refers to a complete conviction in the sincerity, decency, integrity and honesty of someone. Trust is not given just like that, this factor depends on several conditions. A person can initially and unconditionally trust a doctor from a popular clinic, the opinion of a recognized authority in a particular area of ​​life or science, a partner who looks like a loved one. What is trust?
Can I believe it or not?
In new relationships, you always have to win, maintain and even prove confidence. People can be trusted consciously and unconsciously. One can convince one with sincerity or suspicion of deceitfulness by one’s actions, the correspondence between what is said and done. There must always be a correspondence between the promised and completed actions. Otherwise, the loss of confidence of one person to another is inevitable. Children stop trusting parents who lie or refuse promises. With adults, the same thing happens with children. Long open and warm relations between friends or girlfriends are broken as a result of rashly spoken words and various actions.
Even a very important situation cannot always reveal the true character of a person. It is the everyday, routine actions that open up many aspects of the personality.
Fidelity and trust
Internal, sometimes intuitive irrational feelings of guaranteed security can “assign” someone a high coefficient of reliability. So try here to find out what trust is! Confidence in someone else's reliability, open access to the inner world can play a cruel joke with too trusting people.
This is not an abstract concept, it always refers to a specific person. Total trust in everything and everyone is dangerous. It can only be a person who has absolutely no life experience and fear. That is why young children often believe in any adult.
The self-preservation instinct protects one who already knows what a deceived trust is. The problem of trust, personal emotional security exists where there is (or was in the past) negative experience associated with the abuse of openness in personal or official relationships.
What a person is looking for "on the side"
Psychologists have proven that men who regularly cheat on their wives are by no means “giants of sex.” Most often these are people with
low self-esteem. An endless change of girlfriends increases the "self" and "coolness" of such a person only in his own eyes.
Some couples simply do not know how or do not want to interact peacefully, competing with each other. The life of partners is based on mutual reproaches and accusations. Only by changing the way of communication, learning to listen and carefully perceive the words and wishes of your “half”, you can restore confidence and love.
The reasons for female adultery - the topic is rather complicated. Some ladies in such a controversial way achieve attention to their person. In any case, they can be understood, but not justified.
10 ways to easily lose confidence (bad advice)
No one consciously wants people to stop trusting him, to begin to doubt his solidity and reliability. However, in reality it very often happens quite the opposite. Knowing what leads to a loss of authority, to doubts about responsibility, one can also determine how to restore confidence. So, a few tricks to lose the title of "reliable person":
- always smile with a wide "frozen" (as in commercials) or a curved right-handed smile;
- it is extremely rare to keep your promises;
- forget about moral and ethical norms and rules;
- use the “habitual lie” technique for communication;
- constantly ignore the wishes of others;
- neglect their family and official duties;
- easy to betray and change;
- change partners often;
- never take responsibility;
- often be insincere, as they say, "on your mind."
If you regularly apply these simple ten methods in communication with others, you can very quickly acquire the status of a person free from all sorts of obligations and offers.
What do recognized literary celebrities write about trust
There are no universal recipes for how to regain lost trust. Quotes and thoughts of recognized authorities speak of sincerity, love and deception.
- "In love, there can be no betrayal, but there is a beginning and an end ... He who loves will not go anywhere." (V. Dudintsev.)
- “Lies are more often from indifference than from pretense.” (A. Morois.)
- “The punishment of a liar is not that they do not believe him, but that he himself does not trust anyone else.” (D. B. Shaw.)
- “The usual and common reason for cheating is the desire to deceive yourself, not people.” (L. N. Tolstoy.)
Can I learn to trust others
The emotional reaction, the baggage of past grievances, hiding deep in the subconscious, can interfere with a person and control him throughout his future life. Only by trusting himself can he rely on another. The old truth says that what a man himself is, so he sees other people. So, first of all, you need to look at your character traits, correct something, learn sincerity and honesty, openness and fidelity. Having accepted himself, a person understands what trust is, appreciates it and lives happier.
How to recover lost relationships
The trust of others is never permanent. If a person can use the benevolent attitude of people in his interests, then he will act in a similar way with loved ones who love him. There is absolutely no guarantee of fidelity, responsibility and reliability. However, if an individual wants to change and regain his lost position, he can do it as follows:
- First of all, it is necessary to acknowledge the fact of an event, betrayal or lie;
- it is worth accepting the partner’s right to anger, resentment and indignation;
- you cannot justify yourself, you need to rebuild the internal licensing mechanisms;
- recognition of compensation is necessary in order to minimize the harm done to the partner;
- tired of the burden of guilt, do not rush the deceived with forgiveness;
- aggression should not be shown, even if patience is running out.
If the relationship is expensive, they can only be restored by patient, concrete actions. But sometimes no effort can rectify the situation.
How distrust of people affects their own lives
It is difficult enough to re-build relationships when it comes to betrayal of love, family life. Betrayal destroys harmony and leaves deep unhealed wounds in the souls of gullible deceived "halves." It is almost impossible to glue a broken vessel to hide cracks. This happens with the human heart. “Scratches and damage” can be carefully hidden. To smooth the “seams” and heal the wounds of the soul, you need a lot of patience.
Did the gap happen? In this case, the injured party will soon enter into a relationship. It affects past experience, the fear of meeting deception and suffering again.
Sometimes, only having lost a family or parting with a loving person, you can understand what trust is, how important it is to have an open relationship with loved ones. Is it worth it to bring the situation to critical? After all, you can avoid tears, suffering, scandals and accusations by learning to respect those who trust us.