At 50, looking at 30 is the dream of more than half of women. Not everyone succeeds in preserving beauty, youth, attracting the attention of men, and being loved and desired. How to achieve inner harmony, maintain youthful enthusiasm, good spirits? After all, it is so important for a woman to keep the “girl” in herself as long as possible and not turn into a “galosh” dissatisfied with her life. Many have heard the so-called "aunt" syndrome. We are talking about women who, in their third decade, manage to turn into grumpy aunts. Such women cease to follow themselves, are disappointed in life, fall into despondency, lose sexuality. If you look into their eyes, then they do not have a spark at all, only an extinct look. Such women do not dream of anything.
Aunt's syndrome - state of mind
What kind of aunts are they? These women always manage to be indignant to everyone, to notice the most elementary flaws and flaws of those around them. Injustice and deception they see at every step. "Aunts" begin to annoy their children, husbands, strangers. In the future, they are unhappy even with a cold wind or too hot weather.
Aunts blame everyone around them for their difficulties and problems, but not themselves. Such personalities lose the best feminine qualities. They do not grow, do not develop. They do not change, like bright stylish women. Over time, the husband begins to notice all these changes, which is accompanied by quarrels, scandals, tantrums.
Aunt's syndrome often occurs gradually and imperceptibly. In no case should such a process be allowed to drift. After the appearance of several alarming symptoms, you must immediately take up work and start the return stroke.
External changes
Syndrome "aunts" from an internal state passes to external deviations. The most noticeable signs of such a transformation are the following:
- A woman is not at all interested in fashionable things.
- Overweight appears.
- Free clothes are preferred: dimensionless T-shirts and baggy sweaters.
- Shoes are preferred on low heels.
- Complete savings on yourself.
- Beautiful clothes do not appear in the wardrobe.
- Free time is spent watching your favorite television series.
- She doesn’t throw out the tights that have started the arrow, but puts them on under the trousers.
- The most suitable hairstyle is a short haircut.
- Does not visit beauty salons.
- She does not care about the reaction of others to the appearance.
- Ceases to apply cosmetics.
- He believes that the best clothes, hairstyles, music were only in her youth.
- Her style is a woman in a bathrobe.
- Sweets instead of fruits become favorite treats.
In no medical reference book is it possible to find "aunt" syndrome. Signs of changes in the woman indicate that in life this is still a real phenomenon.
Anxiety symptoms
The aunt’s syndrome sometimes starts to turn on when a woman tries to do everything herself. As a result, she gets tired, and the following manifestations are observed:
- chronic fatigue, loss of energy;
- physical fatigue, despondency;
- grunts, breakdowns on relatives;
- loss of sexual desire;
- irritability, headaches;
- loss of easy and spontaneous decision making;
- lack of love for oneself;
- constant dissatisfaction with the actions of others;
- categorical statements about any action;
- rejection of the opinions of others;
- hysteria, aggressiveness;
- resentment, acceptance of the state of the victim, calls for justice;
- low moral acts associated with envy;
- irresistible urge to gossip.
It should be noted that stylish women also have 24 hours a day, but they do not ignore the assistants, skillfully conduct their business, a measured lifestyle. "Obabit" is easiest, but to maintain your body and soul normally you need to work on yourself constantly.
Relationship disorder
The appearance in a woman of signs of "aunt" syndrome can lead to a cooling of relations between husband and wife. Many couples turn to family counselors about this. Sometimes spouses for a long time hide from themselves that their life has turned into a common residence within four walls, no more. A woman in a bathrobe cannot attract her husband all her life. The couple has a lot in common, they begin to be given to children. The property has already managed to jointly earn, as well as debts and problems. What's next?
Being an ideal wife is not easy
There are couples who only spend their holidays together or go to a restaurant. And for some, after the wife’s feminine qualities disappear, things are even worse. This is especially true for couples living in small towns and villages. If you look closely at the female population, then there are a large number of such "aunts". Most often in their youth they were not princesses, did not shine with grace. But well-groomed and stylish women have always been valued, because they know their worth.
What do couples complain about when they come to a psychologist? Personal life and harmonious relationships simply disappear from their orbit. Often a wife complains that this husband has ceased to be ideal, has deteriorated, does not carry her in her arms, does not give flowers and gifts. And the reason may be inside the woman herself.
Sample customer complaint
At the reception, a thirty-eight-year-old woman came to the family counselor, who was stuck with life:
"- Recently, I’m annoyed at everything. My husband and children are very upset about this. My husband tries to help me with the housework, but sometimes I can yell at him for no reason.
- How does he react to this?
- At first he tried to calm me down, joking. Then he began to leave silently, and once he simply shouted and insulted me in response. And I'm very touchy. "
Patient husbands try in every possible way to avoid conflict situations in such cases. It happened exactly the same with this lady. But all patience has an end, after long nitpicking it simply burst from him. This can lead to the partners cooling off to each other and moving away. Then the husband, in search of affection and warmth, can switch to someone else. And those who want to share their care will certainly be found.
It seems to this woman that her husband will not do this to her. Still, you do not need to turn into a regular average woman, who sometimes shows bitchiness. Many behave in a similar way. If you do not change anything, then you can stay in this multi-billion dollar aunt battalion. Nobody wants to replenish these ranks.
Psychologists in such cases advise women to try to get rid of the "aunt" syndrome. It is necessary to show the husband that before him is not a grouchy wife, but a happy, beautiful woman. First you need to learn how to express your wishes in a polite manner, to listen to his opinion. Any dissatisfaction can be transferred to a request or wish.
After such consultations, women understand that they do not want to see themselves in the ranks of "aunts". The advice of a psychologist is an excellent motivator for restructuring the model of your reactions.
Delicious food is the beginning
In the initial stages, "aunts" are greedy and gluttons. They like any food, they are always hungry. They look with envy at their slender friends, not wanting to understand that with their addiction to delicious food, it is impossible to have decent female forms. Such ladies explain their fullness with anything - bad ecology, a malfunction in metabolism, a sedentary lifestyle, lack of time, but not overeating.
Fried potatoes with a patty, pancakes with condensed milk, pasta and meat goulash, pastries with butter cream always prevail over such women. They want to look good, but they can’t stop eating. The external transformation into a "aunt" eventually results in negative emotions, an atmosphere of ill will.
Mini secrets for weapons
The fight against "aunt" syndrome should be in the following activities:
- To exclude from your habits such a format for clarifying relationships as correspondence and talking on the phone. An interlocutor who is far from you can never share your feelings. Such disassembly causes reluctance to return home. It will be better if a person manages to miss you in a day and comes in a good mood.
- Each day needs to be filled with interesting events that carry a positive. All your activity should not consist only of home and work, it will be nice to devote more time to your hobbies, sign up for a pool or fitness, go to a concert of your favorite artist, take a walk in the evening city. New hobbies and interests will help you cope with negative manifestations in your behavior.
- It is necessary to carry out spring cleaning in your head. You need to start with personal care. It does not hurt to go to a beauty salon, visit several fashion boutiques. If you have the opportunity to consult a psychologist, then this is only welcome. It will help defeat the "aunt" syndrome. The psychology of a woman requires constant ordering of herself within.
Correctly meet morning and evening
It all starts in the morning. It depends only on the woman what opinion the man will have about her for the whole day. It is very important in the morning to properly charge in order to be in a good mood. You should not greet your spouse frowning, sleepy and spiteful. You can cheer up a cup of aromatic coffee, and for your husband cook a quick delicious breakfast. Do not forget about tenderness in a relationship. It’s a good habit to kiss your loved ones before you leave home.
Evening time is a moment for family communication. You can discuss with your husband the problems that have accumulated over the day, but you should not proceed to a heated debate. A light dinner, a contrast shower will help remove the negative charge of the day.
The main methods of struggle
Before their formation, each lady goes through three stages: a girl, girl, woman. The latter refers to mom and grandmother. In order not to kill the feminine in yourself at each of these stages, it is worth following the following commandments:
- Any business should be treated easily and with love, because a lady is characterized by what she values and loves.
- Women's charm is a time-consuming process, so do not deny yourself simple pleasures. Some have favorite perfumes, others have diamond earrings or a ring, while others prefer fashionable thongs with rhinestones.
- It is important to experience a sense of freedom. No woman should be burdened with a sense of duty because she is embittered.
- Public opinion should not be a woman’s priority. Happy ladies listen only to themselves and their loved ones.
- A sexy outfit and high-heeled shoes will help attract the admiring glances of men.
- Feminine nature needs regular sex.
- Clothing should not be selected for a female audience, but for a male.
- Any failure should not be made publicly available and discussed.
Being an aunt is a personal choice
A woman should shine with kindness, love, tenderness. Each has a choice: to be a boring "aunt" or a mischievous, provocative lady. Each representative of the fair sex is unique, like this world. So why not find joy in this life? Little pranks will only benefit. On weekends, you can ride a bicycle or, even more wonderful, roller skate. Everyone does not want to grow old. Move this moment as far as possible - in the hands of the people themselves. To maintain a bright, touching, youthful face in old age, you need to make the right choice and become a happy woman.