As they grow older, a person begins to dream of an independent life. Parental attention and guardianship no longer seem so pleasant. In addition, looking at peers who have been active for a long time, young people are increasingly wondering how to leave their parents' homes.
Sort yourself out
Many people wonder how to leave home, guided by the example of their friends or stereotyped thinking. But before you move on to action, think about whether you really want it. You must be aware of the following things:
- You will live alone (unless, of course, you are renting an apartment with friends or a soulmate). Traditional conversations, TV gatherings, family dinners will not be available to you.
- You will have to pay for not only housing, but also food, hygiene items, clothing and much more. Are you well provided for this?
- The whole burden of household chores will also fall on your shoulders. Before you leave home, you need to understand whether you are able to solve everyday problems. To clean, wash, cook - all this will now have to do it yourself.
If there are no problems with finances, and everyday issues do not scare you, you can think about how to live independently.
Conversation with parents
Before you leave home, you need to conduct a thorough conversation with all members of the family. You need to carefully prepare for this event and set yourself up so that your initiative can be perceived negatively. The conversation scenario should be something like this:
- First, talk about how much you love your family and how important warm and strong relationships are for you.
- Next, carefully bring to the fact that you are an adult who is not befitting to burden your family.
- Try to make arguments in your favor. For example, you already earn a lot of money, and you can also take care of yourself in everyday life.
- Explain to your family that leaving your home is not a break in family relationships. Promise that you will see each other often.
- Naturally, you need to give the floor to each member of the family.
How to prepare parents for their move?
Say "I want to leave home!" and banging your fist on the table is the wrong decision. Put yourself in the place of relatives to understand how difficult it is for them to accept this situation. To prepare your loved ones for your move, you can do the following:
- Become a business person. Wash and iron your things yourself. Clean yourself in your room and even cook food. Firstly, you will remove the burden from your relatives, and secondly, prove your independence.
- Try to spend less time at home. Try to stay with friends sometimes at night. If you receive any suggestion about a short business or leisure trip, be sure to agree.
- During family conversations, as if by chance, think about your friends who already live independently.
Ask for help
Parents are extremely sensitive when their child leaves home. Even if he is already 20, 30, or as many as 40 years old, they want to give him their love and in every way to patronize. Therefore, try to smooth out the shock from your move. For example, ask your relatives for help. This may be a search for housing, repairs, home improvement. Perhaps even some financial assistance from parents can be taken as a contribution to your new life.
Nevertheless, parents sometimes try to keep their children at home by blackmailing them with finances. There is a confrontation: children are trying to prove something, but it does not always end well. If you are not confident in your ability to cover at least the minimum expenses, wait a bit with the move.
Where to leave home
When all organizational problems have been resolved, it is time to decide on the place of future residence. Of course, the easiest way is for young people who have just graduated from school. The main thing is to choose a suitable university in another village, and for the next few years the housing problem (hostel) will be solved.
Buying your own apartment is rarely available to young people. And not everyone can overpower a lease. If you are determined to rent your own home, but you don’t have enough money, try to cooperate with one of your friends. Together, it will be easier to solve financial issues, as well as easier to arrange life and organize leisure activities.
If you have financial problems, but independent life is your dream, try carefully looking at job search sites. For example, during the holiday season, many hotels, pensions and motels offer temporary work with the provision of accommodation. True, for this you will most likely have to move to another city, but this will allow you to experience even deeper all the charms and shortcomings of independent living.
If everything is all right with money and mutual understanding, the matter is small. There should be two criteria for choosing a home: proximity to the parental home and a convenient location relative to your place of work.
Parent Tips
Sometimes it becomes a real tragedy for parents if a daughter or son leaves home. Someone silently experiences this problem, and someone begins to blackmail an already adult child and reproach him for his loneliness. Such parents are encouraged to remember their youth. Surely maximalism also raged in you, you dreamed about career achievements and creating your own family. Agree that building a romantic relationship is much easier without parental supervision. In addition, a person should always have a chance for self-realization. If you tie your children to yourself, you risk making them unhappy. Sooner or later they will blame you for all their failures.
Conclusion
How to leave home and live independently? This is a difficult question that requires an individual approach. It will be easier for young people from complete families, where there are also younger brothers and sisters. But what if you are the only comfort of your parents? Of course, this does not bind you to them for life. You just have to be more sensitive and understanding. Your parents will only be happy if you find a strong and loving family, reliable friends, and also achieve success in your work.