Throughout life, people have to constantly deal with various emotional shakes, the most difficult of which is betrayal. It is not surprising. It is quite difficult to forgive a person for a stab in the back and to endure severe pain. The question of why people betray each other worries almost every modern person. In our article, we will try to understand this topic in more detail. We will also reflect on whether to forgive betrayal.
What is betrayal?
"Why betray the closest people?" - A similar question can often be heard in the psychologist’s office. However, few people think about what treason is. This concept has its own meaning for each person. However, most often they call a traitor a person who was immersed in the inner world of his friend or lover, knew his secrets, enjoyed confidence, but for some reason shook this confidence with his unseemly act.
In some cases, people themselves become the culprits of betrayal, placing undue hopes on the honesty of another person. Of course, you always want to feel that you live in a society that does not seek to take advantage of close relationships for the sake of material gain. However, God saves the safe. In most cases, practice shows that it is incredulous people who achieve much more success than naive individuals.
Examples of betrayal
In some cases, it is extremely difficult to determine the severity of an act committed by a loved one, since the very concept of “betrayal” most often depends on individual human perception. Usually, it means a situation when someone from close people acts dishonestly towards his friend or loved one:
- spreads gossip or false rumors behind his back;
- gives secrets and secrets to third parties;
- substitutes for money;
- regularly cheating.
And the worst thing about betrayal is that it is almost impossible to foresee. People can live a calm and measured life, rejoicing together every happy moment. However, sooner or later the hour will come when the loved one will show his true face and cause severe mental pain.
Reasons for betrayal
So why do people betray even their loved ones? It is unlikely that at least one psychologist in the world will give an exact answer to this question. Such an act can be triggered by a variety of factors. For example, a traitor may have serious financial problems, and he will be ready to sacrifice his relationship with a loved one in order to get out of them. In some cases, the blame is on the usual natural instincts, for example, when a guy cheats on a girl whom he loves madly, succumbing to a rush of passion and the habits of an alpha male.
Sometimes betrayal can occur unknowingly. A person who likes to chat with his comrades may accidentally talk about your secret or the secret that you asked to keep. In this case, such an act is almost certainly worth forgiving. However, it also happens that a person forgives the betrayal of a loved one, and he again and again causes severe pain, again assuming the role of the offender. Is it worth forgiving such people? Let's get it right.
Is it worth forgiving a betrayal?
The answer to this question in each case is strictly individual. It all depends on the severity of the person’s act. For example, sometimes it’s enough just to talk with a friend so that he realizes his guilt and no longer betrays your trust. In some cases, the offender may sincerely repent of a perfect act, but this still will not deter him from re-inflicting pain on a loved one.
So one thing is certain. Forgiving a person is a very noble and bold act for which a person is responsible. If you have forgiven a friend or a loved one - subconsciously be prepared for the fact that an unpleasant event can happen again in your life. Of course, you should not completely change the relationship with a loved one, but protect yourself from the next portion of the pain that you can cause.
How to determine that the betrayer feels guilty?
Most honest people after the betrayal will feel extremely uncomfortable and will try to correct the current situation. Sometimes a person can suffice for a banal “sorry”, and sometimes it becomes clear how they are heartbroken and even after forgiveness try to make amends by all means. Although this happens far from so often.
Why do not betrayed people feel guilty? This phenomenon can occur for various reasons. Perhaps somewhere in the depths of their souls they harbored resentment against their friend or lover. Or they simply are not used to repenting of their actions and consider themselves always right. Be that as it may, only you are able to decide for sure whether to forgive this person or not.
How to learn to forgive people
Now you know a lot about why people are betrayed. However, to learn to forgive people, such knowledge will not be enough. Try to comprehend everything properly, putting yourself in the place of your offender. Perhaps he had good reasons for betrayal, which you are not aware of.
In most cases, completely calm down, experiencing severe mental pain, is extremely difficult. Emotions will now prevail over the mind and go out. Try to keep your sanity. Cry and scream when you are alone with yourself, splashing out all the negativity.
As soon as you manage to return a sober mind, you will be able to fully understand the situation and see two sides of the coin at once. Perhaps after that you will be able to completely forgive a person for a perfect act by finding part of the guilt for what he has done within himself. Well, or at least you will be able to learn from all this a valuable life lesson.
How to keep faith in people
A friend betrayed and now you do not know how to trust other people? Just give yourself time to cool. At a difficult moment, it may seem that happiness will never return to your life, and people will continue to betray you. Try to believe in the best. Do not put everyone under one comb. After a month or a year, luck will surely smile at you, and you will find the warm and clean relationships that you have been looking for.
We hope our article helped you understand why people betray. If you still have any questions about this, be sure to watch a short video in which you will also find a lot of useful information for those people who have been betrayed. In no case do not cultivate your pain, but rather remember those warm moments that were between you and the offender.