If a guy wonders how to put a girl in his place, this is not a single gram of chauvinism. It just happens that a person, because of his selfish nature, is not able to understand the other and imposes his ideals on him. The longer people stay together, the more they learn about each other, naturally, over time, a certain framework is established in which someone will be the main (leader), and someone - the slave.
If the main guy, then, in principle, there are no additional questions. But if a girl took over the reins of government, then immediately a number of inconveniences appear, because of which alliances often break up. So, how to put a girl in her place so as not to become a typical henpecked?
Audacity second happiness
Surely every guy was in a situation where his girlfriend was not humanly impudent and did not value relations at all. When you have to drink pink semisweet instead of your favorite unfiltered or watch melodrama instead of the decisive match of your favorite team - these are the first “bells and whistles”. If the girl sat on her neck, then you should no longer expect respect, understanding, tenderness and patience from her. She will be on her mind and will do only what she needs. She does not hesitate to insult or publicly humiliate.
Why so? A month ago, she was "white and fluffy" and suddenly changed. There are only two options: either she checks the guy for “professional suitability” (whether he can become that notorious wall behind which you can feel safe), or the girl is simply not able to truly love, and she is used to using others for her own purposes.
True, psychologists are considering other reasons that could provoke such behavior.
Boyfriend to Girl
Often, if the relationship does not last long, then it is not unusual that the girl has changed. The reason for this may be the guy’s attitude: he tried too hard to please her. When a girl accidentally blamed the guy, and he only smiled indulgently, she realized that you can be tougher with your chosen one.
If the girl realizes that the guy has become a hostage to the relationship, she begins to put a lot of pressure, because only in this way you can achieve your goal. Of course, you can get used to the darling of your chosen one, but there is only one “but”: this girl is nearby only because she has not received her plan. Sooner or later, she will say: “We better stay friends.”
Decision
The guy should immediately let the girl know that he is not a teddy bear and such a relationship does not suit him. Putting a girl in place somehow needs to. Do not tell her disgusting and rude.
It is better to choose softer expressions filled with deep meaning, and do not forget to mention the consequences. For example: “I noticed that our relations have changed, and not in the direction I would like. If this continues, we will not succeed in creating the future.”
If a girl really values ​​relationships, then she will certainly understand the whole point of what has been said. Most likely, she will cry - this is a normal reaction of a loving person. But if she reacted without emotion, depicting a contemptuous smirk on her face, then you should not even think that you can change something. As the good old oriental proverb says: "The horse is dead - get down." These relationships have long been exhausted.
Another layout
If the guy was trying to put the girl in place, as described above, but could not understand what kind of reaction this caused her, you can use another method of "taming the obstinate." This time you have to move from words to actions. It is necessary to show the beloved in practice that there are a lot of girls around, and it will not be difficult to find a replacement for her. But nothing vulgar. You need to act carefully, as if hinting at possible actions, but not taking them.
Looks at the beauties by chance, casual touches, a smile in the direction of another girl - that's enough. If it becomes clear that the girl still feels for the guy something more than just consumer feelings, then you need to continue to put the girl in place.
Seize the moment
So, how to put a girl in her place in a relationship after it became known that she still feels something for her boyfriend? It is necessary to completely change the attitude towards her: call her less, stop writing SMS, make pleasant surprises for no reason. One must still be kind and loving, but a little tough. After the conversation, the guy needs to pretend that he no longer values ​​the relationship as highly as it did before.
It is necessary to make the girl understand that you need to feel the border between quarrels and discussions about current events.
Treason
It also happens that a girl does not re-read, does not scandal, does not require anything, but simply quietly changes. This also needs to be fought. So what if a girl cheats? The main thing is not to suffer, not to scandalize and not to shed tears. After all, men are a strong sex, and they need to stay until the very end.
Psychologists believe that the tendency to treason is part of both female and male nature, and only the mind is able to curb this tendency. It’s not that the guy is not like that, the girl just wanted new sensations, that’s all. It's like buying a handbag in a store - she liked it, she bought it. Usually, the ladies do not think about the consequences, and their loving halves reluctantly persuade themselves that they have stumbled, with whom, they say, does not happen - and forgive everyone.
Forgiveness cannot be parted
Answering the question of what to do if a girl is cheating, you can bring a lot of advice from psychologists. Someone says that you need to understand and forgive, and someone advises that you need to contact a family therapist, find out the true root of the problem and exterminate it. Someone else may say that you need to leave.
In fact, there is no right answer to this question. Each guy must decide for himself what he will do. I would like to say that only those girls who lack basic moral principles and a healthy system of values ​​change. It may be possible to re-educate her, but no one gives guarantees. It may sound too cynical, but defective things usually change in stores. It is also necessary to deal with girls who have changed: having stumbled once, she will certainly go again in search of new sensations.
Financial difficulties
In most cases, if a girl is on her own mind, she will constantly demand money from a guy. True, this does not always mean that it is mercantile. Sometimes, demanding financial assistance, women check how wealthy a man is and whether he will be able to provide for his family in the future.
If at some point there is no money to bring his chosen one to a restaurant, the guy just needs to directly tell her about it. Offer to take a walk around the city or watch a movie at home, and postpone the trip to the restaurant until better times. A girl who cares about relationships will not mind, but one who needs only money can create a real scandal.
If the whole problem comes down to the fact that a girl requires money, then there are two behavioral strategies, but first, the guy needs to understand who he sees in his chosen one: the future wife or a one-time relationship.
- If nothing serious is planned with a girl, then from time to time you can spend evenings with her when you have money, and promise nothing more.
- If a guy sees his girlfriend as his wife, then he should act in a completely different way. Directly talk to her and convey a common sense that saving has not bothered anyone.
Nasty tips
As they say, whoever is lucky is loaded onto that one. If the girl is on her own mind, she will quickly understand where the guy is giving slack, and will begin to beat there in order to achieve some of her goals.
As you know, a person quickly gets used to the good, so you do not need to do such things:
- You can not neglect your personal space and time. Be sure to have a place and time for rest and recovery.
- You must not tell about yourself the innermost things that others do not know.
- No need to build a Rockefeller, and then bite your elbows.
- Do not bother with expensive gifts and signs of attention.
- Do not talk about pay and bonuses. For some reason, some girls believe that the salary of their guys should go to their maintenance by default, and if this does not happen, there will be a scandal.
- A joint budget can only be if the two decide to live together, that is, a serious relationship.
- Help on request, but not on demand.
- Do not play with the girl in the "mother-daughter", allowing her to be a capricious child with the constant "I want to."
- Do not ask permission for something, confront the fact. It is somehow unnatural to seek permission to meet friends in a bar.
And most importantly, you do not need to pretend to be Romeo, a gentleman, a hero-lover, and so on through the list. Having seen at least once on his chosen one a “positive mask”, the girl will demand to wear it constantly.
Useful Tips
It is possible to come to a truce with the help of the most ordinary constructive dialogue, when two adults calmly tell each other about existing problems and try to find a way out with common forces. But putting the girl in her place with words is somehow not as simple as it seems.
To be honest, not every guy can accomplish such a feat. The first reason is time. It is necessary to show your discontent as soon as the first “bells” have appeared, and not endure for six months, and then make a scandal once.
Adults do not quarrel and do not yell at each other, they know how to find a compromise. The rules of constructive dialogue are simple:
- Do not interrupt the interlocutor.
- To speak in a calm and even voice.
- Respect the interlocutor and his opinion, learn to make concessions. Notice: concessions, not self-sacrifice.
Beware!
Neither in relations, nor in everyday life should there be such relations that restrict freedom and discredit a person as a person. So, what should not be:
- Self-esteem of a guy should not depend on the opinion of the girl. A guy needs to critically evaluate himself, determine his strengths and weaknesses and never lower his bar to a woman’s opinion.
- The girls are cunning - they will praise the guys for their professional achievements, and they will eventually feel addicted. To get rid of the obsession, you need to at least once offer your chosen one to spend the weekend not in Europe, but for the accumulated documents.
- Despite the fact that the girl may be financially secure, she will still require financial support from the guy. Cute presentations are quite acceptable, but spending 70% of your salary on another expensive gadget is not a man’s deed at all, but an ordinary sacrifice.
- Sex turns into a reward to be earned.
- If a girl begins to believe that all that a guy has is her personal property, and God forbid, he will dispose of his property and funds without her knowledge.
- Romance should be expensive, solid and constant. The girl is not satisfied with a simple admiration for the moon.
- The girl’s appearance becomes a guy’s material problem. Now he has to pay for manicure, pedicure, a solarium, wardrobe, etc. And most importantly, for the phone, because the girl constantly calls her friends to consult about "tuning". Bills will not be paid - there will be a scandal.
You can find many more signs that the girl is using her boyfriend, but this is superfluous. If the first warning signs appear, measures must be taken. The faster the guy decides whether he will be with the girl or not, the easier he will get rid of the relationship. It is worth remembering that it is much easier for a person to invest his time, money and energy in a hopeless business than to admit that he lost “in love”.