Non-verbal gestures and their meaning

Sometimes people's words do not correspond to their true beliefs and intentions. Non-verbal gestures will help you figure out what your interlocutor is really thinking. Be a little more careful during communication. This will allow you to get much more information than your opponent would like to convey.

Is it true?

Many people are skeptical of such a thing as non-verbal communication. Gestures, facial expressions are perceived as something natural and machine. But precisely given this fact, we can talk about the objectivity of the non-verbal mechanism. Psychologists have devoted a lot of scientific work to this issue. But if for skeptics this is not an argument, it is enough to conduct an independent observation. So, for example, having learned to decipher the thoughts and feelings of your near and dear ones, later you will be able to see strangers through and through.

Of course, do not forget that there are exceptions to the rules. So, a person can take one or another pose simply by virtue of habit. In addition, it cannot be ruled out that he feels bad or that he is wearing uncomfortable clothes. Human behavior can be significantly affected by air temperature. Thus, do not underestimate the role of non-verbal communication. Nevertheless, before making final conclusions, it is worthwhile to carefully analyze the conditions in which the conversation takes place.

What hands in pockets say

You can often notice how a person holds his hands in his pockets during a conversation. Someone considers this a manifestation of bad manners. Also, do not reject the likelihood that a person is elementarily frozen, being in uncomfortable temperature conditions. Nevertheless, if we consider the non-verbal sign language, we can come to the following conclusions:

• Hands hidden in pockets can be a sign of intense concentration. A person in this position can think about something or build an action plan. At the same time, it can sway slightly or roll from heel to toe.
• Another decoding of this gesture is boredom. For example, at long meetings or social evenings, people often go with their hands in their pockets, because you can’t leave the event, but nothing interesting happens at it. Thus, if your interlocutor took a similar pose, it may be worthwhile to end the conversation or transfer it to a more fascinating channel.
• If the speaker and the speaker did not hide his hands in his pockets, this may indicate his insincerity. Usually, it is the hands that give the lie, and therefore the person instinctively hides them so that you do not unravel his intentions.
• Alternatively, hands in pockets can talk about the passive position of your interlocutor. He is most likely not interested or unwilling to do what you tell him. But the result, of course, will depend only on the level of your authority.
• If we consider the non-verbal gestures of men, then in communicating with the ladies, hands hidden in the pocket of trousers (namely trousers!) Speak of sympathy and sexual desire. But communicating with representatives of their own gender, they thus demonstrate power and independence.

Demonstration of excellence

Knowing non-verbal gestures, you can greatly simplify your life, because by them you can understand the true intentions and attitude of the interlocutor to you. So, for example, if someone is trying to demonstrate self-confidence, as well as superiority and power over you, this can be understood by the following signs:

• A man puts his hands behind his back, bulging his chest forward. Thus, he tries to show his fearlessness.
• Hands are casually lowered into pockets, and the body is impressively relaxed. Thus, a person tries to show that you are indifferent and uninteresting to him.
• Sometimes an overbearing person can take a defensive position by crossing his arms over his chest and stretching out his thumbs. The latter means that although he is trying to defend himself, he feels superior to you.

Tactile interaction

When considering non-verbal gestures, it is worth paying special attention to tactile interaction with the interlocutor. So, we can talk about the following:

• If you are hugging when meeting with a friend or relative, a short contact should be taken as nothing more than a tribute to decency.
• A strong hug means that a person is bored and sincerely glad to see you. However, if the impact is too strong, and you literally choke on it, it is possible that the person is only trying to play the joy of meeting you.
• If during a hug a person treats you with reverence and you feel comfortable, this indicates a respectful attitude towards you.
• If at a meeting a person first opens his palm for a handshake, this indicates his boundless trust in you.
• If during a handshake a person does not take his hand, but closer to his wrist, this indicates his suspicious mood. This is precisely how, during the time of the Roman Empire, they checked if there was a dagger in the sleeve of the other person.
• If a person shakes your hand tightly or wraps your arms around it with two hands, shaking it vigorously (possibly even causing you discomfort), this only indicates his sincere joy in meeting you.
• If during a handshake you felt that your interlocutor’s hand is sluggish, then productive communication will not work, because he is not determined to contact you.
• If a person puts his hand palm down, he subconsciously seeks to dominate you.
• A slap on the shoulder means a friendly attitude. In addition, this gesture demonstrates the strength of the interlocutor and his willingness to come to the rescue.
• Be mindful of the people who grab your elbow during a conversation. Feeling your mistrust, they similarly try to win you over and even suggest that he can become a reliable friend for you. But this gesture is not always sincere, because people with selfish intentions often use this psychological technique.

How to recognize sympathy

One of the main problems in the relationship between the opposite sexes is distrust. Sometimes more than words, non-verbal communication can tell. Gestures that indicate sympathy are as follows:

• The gleam in the eyes is not a myth. A person who feels sympathy does look a little different, and the cornea becomes more hydrated. In addition, the pupils will be somewhat dilated.
• A man in love on a subconscious level is trying to please. Thus, when meeting, he performs various manipulations with his appearance: he straightens his back, draws in his stomach, and straightens his hair.
• Both men and women are trying to draw attention to external sexual characteristics. This can be putting fingers on the belt of trousers, legs wide apart, unbuttoned top button of the shirt.
• Active gestures (sometimes inappropriate) can also be a sign of sympathy. The fact is that a man in love often loses control over his actions.
• You can evaluate the interlocutor's intentions in the direction of his gaze. If he constantly looks into the eyes, there is reason to believe that he is interested in you, as a person. And the gaze, running through the body, speaks of nothing more than sex drive.
• If the interlocutor of the opposite sex is constantly trying to get close, or under any pretext to touch you, you can not doubt his sympathy.

Lack of interest

Sometimes a person continues the story, not suspecting that the interlocutor is absolutely uninteresting. Nonverbal communication will come to the rescue. Indifference gestures are:

• If your interlocutor crosses his arms over his chest, he instinctively closes himself from you. You are either indifferent or unpleasant to him.
• Pay attention to where the interlocutor’s gaze is directed. If he looks anywhere, but not in your direction, then you should end the conversation.
• If a person wants to end the conversation and leave, he will be given out by a constant glance at the clock. Also, the socks of his shoes can be directed towards the door.

Features facial expressions

Much can be said about a person and his mood, his facial expressions. Non-verbal gestures reflected on the face may indicate the following:

• narrowed eyes and pursed lips speak of an angry mood;
• raised eyebrows and wide open eyes mean surprise;
• in a state of fear, the lips are widely stretched, and their corners are lowered down;
• happiness is characterized by a calm look and slightly raised corners of the mouth;
• a sad man brings eyebrows together and lowers the corners of his lips.

Voice intonation

The main ways of transmitting information are verbal. Non-verbal gestures can demonstrate what the interlocutor is trying to hide. No less informative may be intonation, which can tell about the following:

• fast and confused speech in low tones indicates intense excitement;
• a confident and loud conversation indicates active enthusiasm;
• if a person speaks languidly, lowering his tone to the end of the phrase, we are talking about fatigue;
• measured and slow speech, which is characterized by constant tonality, testifies to the arrogance of the interlocutor;
• constant pauses in speech, unintentional errors indicate nervousness and self-doubt.

Signs of a lie

Knowing the meaning of non-verbal gestures, one can recognize the lies of the interlocutors. So, it is worth paying attention to the following points:

• a long pause before the start of the phrase or frequent pauses;
• asymmetry in the work of facial muscles;
• more than 10 seconds does not change facial expression;
• emotions arise late and do not correspond to the content of speech;
• a tight smile, which creates not a curved, but a narrow line of lips;
• lack of eye contact;
• manipulations with arms and legs (tapping, twitching), as well as biting the lips;
• attempts to control gestures;
• heavy breathing and a constant increase in the tone of voice;
• closed posture with arms and legs crossed, as well as a hunched back;
• rubbing the nose or eyelids (it can be mechanical and barely noticeable);
• the right side (in terms of gestures and facial expressions) is more active than the left;
• exaggerated emotions and gestures;
• frequent blinking.

Distance

Considering non-verbal means of gestures, one can not say about the distance that is maintained between people in certain conditions. So, the following indicators are considered generally accepted:

• to half a meter is the intimate distance between close people who are in trusting relationships;
• from 0.5 to 1.5 m is an interpersonal distance for companionship;
• 1,5-3,5 m - social distance, which is comfortable for interaction between unfamiliar people, as well as on business issues;
• 3.7 m is the public distance from which a speech is delivered to a large audience.

Good to know everyone

Max Egger has an invaluable merit in studying such a question as non-verbal means of gestures. He developed a system of 75 signals, the main of which are the following:

• Adam's apple movement testifies to disturbance of the interlocutor or that he tells a lie;
• if the hands are in contact with any object, this indicates uncertainty;
• if a person strokes his chin, he ponders the proposal;
• biting a finger, pencil, or temple of glasses means that a person is evaluating you;
• stroking the back of your neck means anger or a sense of threat from you;
• if a person rubs his palms, he expects to receive benefits;
• if the toes of the feet are apart, the person feels superior to you.

Conclusion

If you want to know more than they say, you should learn sign language. Non-verbal communication is difficult to control, and therefore it can be considered the most objective. Nevertheless, you should never forget that certain gestures can be associated with well-being or external influences.