Today's topic of our conversation does not promise to be easy. It will be about suicide notes. And immediately there are associations with suicides. But in most cases, it is they who leave the farewell messages. Let's talk about it.
Suicide note and suicide
A man who arbitrarily passed away is weak or strong? How to decide? For most people, this is simply not possible. Why is this happening? As a rule, the answers lie in the dying messages. The cause may be a disease, unrequited love, a huge debt hole and many other circumstances. In them, suicides apologize for the unauthorized departure from life, or, conversely, blame someone for their death.
Every year the number of young people who have passed away is growing. This is not just scary, it is a tragedy. But in most cases it can be avoided, warned. You need to hear your children, participate in their lives. It is difficult not to notice the internal changes and torments, you should not hide from problems, they need to be solved, help your child always and in everything.
The scary thing is that many teenagers have long been preparing for this prohibitively unreasonable step. They look at forums, communicate with potential suicides similar to themselves, and study information on how to correctly compose a suicide note. But with their actions they warn of their intention to leave this world.
Let's talk about teenage suicide
More often young people 10–14 years old commit suicide. However, it cannot be said that these are children from poor families. In 78% of cases, it was revealed that they lived in decent conditions.
There is no clear answer to the question of why children take this terrible step. Psychologists, working with children who managed to survive after an attempted suicide, identified several main reasons:
- Hopeless love. Adolescence is a period of growing up. Children look at the world differently. Physiologically change, leaving a cozy home world. Begin to build other relationships with others. From 12-13 years old children copy the character traits of people in whom they see their idol. Therefore, it is very important for the child to remain a friend and, of course, a model of behavior. The child must be sure that you support him in any case, listen and give advice.
- Loss of meaning in life. For some reason, the child may plunge into himself, close. It can be problems with peers at school, poor relationships with family people. And parents, not noticing the problem, will be glad that the child is calm and diligent. It is necessary to feel your child, be interested in his life, and constantly talk.
- Loneliness. A very common problem. Sometimes, for various reasons, children remain abandoned. When parents disappear at work, and an old grandmother watches the child. They lack attention. And then they begin by any means trying to turn it on themselves. And suicide is one of the means. The child goes to extremes to hear his cry of the soul, and in most cases he does not want death, but you can’t joke with her. Death "make-believe" can become real.
- Death in spite. Often children in this way manipulate their parents if they don’t buy or do something. Like, they’ll die in spite, let them suffer.
- Family dramas. The scandals and troubles that occur in front of children very often cause suicide. They become depressed, the terrible stress that they experience with unstable mental development exacerbates the situation. It’s hard to cope with this problem yourself. Even worse, when in the midst of family drama, a child unwittingly becomes a witness to the words that he is a burden and a hindrance. This, in most cases, becomes the last straw for taking a terrible step into the abyss, and the suicide note left is all that remains ...
Parents, find time for their children, show care, give love and affection. We devote so much attention to this issue because child suicide is the tragedy of all mankind. The dying notes of adolescents - calls ...
Alarms
To never find horrible letters, you must learn to see and hear your children. What you should pay attention to:
- Closure. If a child sits at home, closed in a room, does not go out, is not friends with anyone, and it can be taciturn with you. Communicate more, hug, kiss the child. The kid should understand that he can always turn to you for help.
- Indifference. The child is not interested in anything, he is able to study well, but without enthusiasm, to fulfill the requirements, due to the lack of his own desires. Offer to do something, enroll in a section or circle. Having found a hobby, he will perk up, find meaning in life.
- Simulation of the disease and making terrible diagnoses. The child thus informs that he is lonely and painful, and when you are near, it becomes easier. Then they gradually come to suicide and begin to scare it. But unfortunately, there are many cases when a staged death became real.
- The most alarming call is when the children talk and imagine how bad it would be to family and friends without them. At first they often think about suicide, but these are just thoughts at the level of imagination. The more often you twist them in your head, the less absurd they seem. An idea grows into a thought form. One minor breakdown may be the last straw. Having noticed these symptoms in a child, consult a competent psychologist.
There can be many reasons, but loving your child, it is difficult not to notice them, just do not close your eyes to disturbing calls.
You ask who is to blame?
Child psychologist O. Voroshilova, who treated children after suicide attempts, claims that the full blame lies with the parents. And in most cases, it turns out that the children lived in families with a poor psychological climate.
It is important for the child:
- Understand that there are no unsolvable problems.
- Know that parents will always hear and understand.
- Have confidence that, having come with grief, you will not reject it, but support it, you will not begin to read moralizing.
- To relatives seriously and with understanding to his problems.
We must be glad that the child turned to you, and not to a friend, and shared happiness or misfortune. This means that he trusts, and all difficulties can be overcome together. The main thing is to show the child that life is amazing and beautiful, and that no matter what happens, there is a way out.
How do people decide to cross the line of life?
The statistics are terrible, over the past twenty years in Russia there have been about 800 thousand suicides, and the country is in second place in the world in terms of suicide prevalence. Men settle accounts with life more often than women, the average age of male suicides is 45 years, women - 52 years.
Further, according to the opinion poll, it was revealed what a person needs for a healthy emotional state of mind. So, 44.2% of Russians believe that there is a goal in life, 41.1% - a family.
What is suicide? Causes
This is nothing but an extreme way to escape from yourself. A person at the time of this deep personality crisis experiences a strong emotional overload, and suicide is for him the only (unreasonable) way out.
Suicide can be divided into accented and real. Imaginary suicide happens in a state of passion, and a suicide note is not found at the scene of the tragedy. In most cases, such a suicide does not end in death, because a person shouts his inner pain so much, he asks for help.
Real suicide is a carefully planned event. The dying message is written consciously, has meaningful information. What pushes people to this desperate step:
- unrequited love;
- family trouble;
- feeling of loneliness;
- serious illness;
- loss of a loved one;
- state of depression.
The suicide note may indicate who drove him to this extreme. So, the reasons are:
- physical and moral bullying;
- bullying;
- rape;
- religious fanaticism;
- blackmail, reservation, humiliation.
But it is punishable by law. This is stated in article 110 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation “Bringing to Suicide”. The World Health Organization has reported that every 40 seconds there is one suicide in the world, and there are 20 times more attempts to take scores with life than suicide deaths.
Let's talk about the dying messages of famous people
The host of the TV Center TV channel Boris Notkin passed away at the age of 75. He was found dead at a dacha in the Moscow Region in the Odintsovo district. A note was found near the body. What was written in Notkin's suicide note? It was the cause of his death. He voluntarily passed away because he was tired of torment. He was diagnosed with a fourth-degree cancer in May 2017. Notkin's death note testified to a voluntary departure from life.
The famous TV presenter decided not to suffer, because the disease was incurable, and commit suicide. Nearby was discovered a suicide note by Boris Notkin and a hunting rifle, which he allegedly acquired for defense, from which a gunshot was fired. Discovered a suicide note of Boris Notkin, his wife.
Another big shock
In 1994, the soloist of the cult group Nirvana Kurt Cobain passed away. After it was found a dying letter written by a musician shortly before his death.
It was kept secret, out of doubt whether it was his handwriting and when it was written. But the state of Washington did disclose the contents of Kurt's suicide note, which is attached to the case file.
His body, with a bullet in his head, was found on the floor of his apartment in Seattle, four days after death. The murder weapon lay on his chest. Cobain's death note was addressed to his fictional childhood friend Bodde.
Heroin was found in a large dose in the blood, but the police announced that the cause of death was a gunshot wound. Let's talk about the contents of a suicide note by Cobain. But first, recall the facts of his biography.
What is the rock idol of millions?
He grew up in an ordinary family, his father is a mechanic, his mother is a waitress. His interest in music woke up at the age of two. Native aunt and uncle were also musicians, and at seven, Kurt received a drum kit from them .
Being an eight-year-old boy, he is going through a divorce of his parents, very hard. After this family drama, it becomes closed and even hostile. Cynicism manifested itself in character. At first he lived with his mother, then his own uncle committed suicide. Kurt loved him infinitely. Then he moved to Montesano with his father, but, not finding a common language with his new wife, left his house. As a teenager, he lived alternately with both parents.
Musician Warren Mason taught fourteen-year-old Kurt to play the guitar. After graduating from school for a long time, the guy was hanging around idle, having fun with friends. In 1986, he got a job, on the eighth day he was arrested for drinking alcohol on foreign territory.
Subsequently, he organized a musical group, which soon broke up. After the group Nirvana was born. Music combined two styles: punk and pop. The group gained incredible popularity in 1991. The halls gathered thousands of spectators. His wife was Courtney Love. They had a daughter, Francis Bean Cobain.
The death of an idol
From childhood, Kurt suffered from psychological disorders and was forced to take special medications. And also at a young age, he tried drugs and became addicted to them, having gained a real addiction. Of course, the divorce of parents affected, and uncles on the father's side, alcoholics, mentally ill, who committed suicide, left their imprint on his psyche.
The musician began to use heroin and suffered a severe overdose. Friends persuaded him to go to the clinic for rehabilitation, but he escaped from it.
On April 8, 1994, a friend found him dead in a house. Fans continue to believe that the murder was committed.
Kurt Cobain's suicide note in Russian had the following meaning
The beginning tells that he lost the meaning of life and love for music. Kurt talks about his shame for this, writes that, standing backstage when the roar of the crowd explodes, the heart does not ache. That he does not have such a passion for his work as Freddie Mercury, who appreciated every second spent on stage, loved the audience and bathed in their applause. He opens his soul, turns himself inside out, saying that he is not able to deceive his viewer. No longer wants to pretend and go on stage, the time has come to leave her. Shouting about the great love for people, fans, shows his humanity. His emotional state brought to a boiling point, no return.
He recalled in a letter his wife and daughter. He expressed unlimited love to them. Conducted a subtle psychoanalysis of seeing himself in a daughter. Francis - a dead rocker, becomes self-destructive and unhappy, like him. He is grateful for his good life, but marks the seven-year frontier of the psychological anguish of the child’s soul, about hatred and love for humanity. He considered himself too impulsive and predictable. Having lost his passion, he chose a bright and short life, in fact, boring, devoid of meaning and long. These were his last words in the letter. He expressed his love for his wife and daughter, asked his wife never to give up for the sake of Francis, whose life would be better without him.
After the death of the great musician, his diary gained immense popularity, the quotes of which became just as legendary. Dying notes of people indicate the loss of a loved one, friend, friend, idol. Reading them, you understand that the person is no longer there, only lines remain.
Mikhail Zadornov
More recently, the prominent writer and satirist Mikhail Zadornov did not become, he left us at 69 years old. He was a member of the Writers' Union of Russia, published more than a dozen books. He was the author and presenter of many television shows, in particular such as “Full House” and “Smehopanorama”.
A year ago, a brain tumor was discovered in him. He published on the social network "VKontakte" information that for this reason concerts are canceled. After a course of chemotherapy in a Berlin clinic, Zadornov underwent rehabilitation in the Baltic states. The disease could not be defeated. They decided to stop the painful treatment.
On November 10, 2017, the great satirist Mikhail Zadorny did not become. He said that all methods of treatment have already been tried, nothing helps. The last will was the desire to go to Jurmala and there to live your life in peace, surrounded by close people.
Zadorny’s death note is not a message, but a demand in which he stated three wishes:
- Save the library to them. Nikolai Zadorny in Riga, do not stop funding her.
- The second desire was the will to be buried in his father’s grave.
- To transport the body by land mode of transport.
The legendary satirist Mikhail Zadornov will remain forever in our hearts.
About the dying message of V. Mayakovsky
The death of the poet remains a mystery to this day, whether he himself left this world or he was helped to do this. Let's talk about the contents of the suicide note of the poet, which dates back to April 12, 1930. He wrote a message two days before his death. At first, doubts arose whether this letter was his, as it was done in pencil, with almost no punctuation marks. After found that it is genuine.
So, what was written in Mayakovsky’s death note? The great poet asked not to blame anyone for his death and not to speak badly of him after his death, saying that the dead did not like it. He asked for forgiveness from relatives and friends, warning that this was not an option, and this should not be done, but not in his case. He also ordered in a letter to give his creations to the Brik family. And he said about 2 thousand rubles in his desk for paying tax, the rest he ordered to receive from Giza.
This letter allows us to conclude that Mayakovsky was a responsible person. It would seem that he is passing away after death anyway, but he worried about his relatives.
This message caused a lot of controversy. Why did he mention Veronika Polonskaya there in a row with close people, so he set up a married woman? But there was an explanation for this, the poet wanted to protect her financially, and everyone knew about their connection.
Another interesting fact. He writes, they say, Lilya Brik, love me. But everyone knows that for a long time there was no love, and indeed, she never loved the poet. Nevertheless, he leaves his legacy in her hands, because she, like no one else, understood his work, was very grip and had great connections.
The poet wanted his creations to be preserved and live. That is why he entrusted them to the Briks. And there is a phrase confirming this, they say, let's forget all the strife and resentment, and love me after my departure.
The letter also contained a quatrain, the first lines of which should logically be addressed to Lily Brik. He wrote that the event has exhausted itself, the love boat is broken about life. I decided to leave, so there is no room for mutual insults and reproaches. But it’s still not about her. Lily lived in excellent conditions, rowing everything to herself. And in difficult moments of the poet's life, when he needed support, he left him. The Brik family left for London, to mother Lily.
When the ill-fated shot rang out, Lily and the family were not nearby. But they managed to arrive by April 16 at the time of the funeral. After which Lily burned all the letters that were kept by him. Destroyed a great asset, evidence of the poet’s life, pages of a biography.
She also seized the diary, published some fragments, and then completely banned it, as did her diaries.
If the "love boat" does not apply to the spouse, then what did the poet mean? Maybe this is due to the main version of suicide? After all, so many troubles fell upon him overnight, maybe he simply could not stand it, which led to a nervous breakdown and such an outcome.
Could failures bring the great poet to death? Most likely, he was attacked throughout his life, and the most severe ones. And not only from literary critics, but also from friends. And the authorities did not like his poetic thinking and style. He learned to fight back in disputes, knew how to defend himself. In a farewell letter he also addresses Yermilov, expressing thereby a desire to continue discursive feuds. Therefore, failure could not bring to such a critical state. Moreover, new works were written.
Perhaps we are talking about unhappy love. In his life there was a third woman, Tatyana Yakovleva, in whose marriage the poet did not want to believe. They were divorced by fate. She left for France and stayed there. The situation of the country did not allow returning. She relied on the almighty Mayakovsky, but he himself could not bring the lady of his heart to modest penates, especially when such changes took place in the country: prices rose, Stalin abolished NEP, the shelves in the stores were empty, and she was used to a different life, yes and what will he do in the USSR?
Mayakovsky was afraid of a stray bullet, to remain alone. Nora lived in her own theater, Lily did not love him at all, and, alas, it did not work out with Tatyana. Love boat crashed into everyday life ...
On April 14, early in the morning, he gave a telegram to France, Tatyana Yakovleva, they say, today in Moscow the poet Vladimir Mayakovsky shot himself.