How to learn to get along with people? How to find a common language? Sometimes it happens that, speaking the same language, about the same problem and even sharing the same point of view, people do not hear each other, do not understand, draw wrong conclusions. Why it happens? Let's try to deal with this issue.
The concept of "common language"
What conceals this concept? To find a common language means to reach mutual understanding, to find an opportunity to agree among themselves, to come to a mutual agreement with the interlocutors regarding the views and thoughts, actions and deeds, solutions to a particular problem.
However, from a psychological point of view, reaching mutual understanding is not always easy. People grew up and raised in a different environment, received a different education, each have their own profession, have diverse values and habits, lead a different lifestyle. And many more factors affect the way of thinking and behavior of people in a given situation.
How to make contact with people
Communication is a very important part of our life. It is present in all areas of life: in the family, at work, in the store, chatting with friends, colleagues and just strangers. It is necessary to find a common language with different people in order to avoid conflict situations, not to enter into disputes, just in order to be in a calm and comfortable state and always have a good mood.
Some people succeed easily, we can say that they received this priceless gift from nature. For others, this is much harder. However, learning to find a common language and build relationships with people is possible. Think for yourself, because at one time all our friends and colleagues were strangers to us. As an example, you can look at the children, how they easily, unobtrusively and naturally make friends.
Tips for getting along with others
First of all, tune in to communication with others. No need to constantly concentrate on yourself and your problems. Be open and friendly. Learn to listen to other people. And not only listen, but also hear. Take an interest in what is happening in their life, what they live with, what their hobbies are, what are their plans for the future.
Try to find something in common. It can be any memories and events from the past, common interests and hobbies, the same way of life, similar tastes in clothes, food, books, similar plans for the future. You can also always discuss general topics, such as weather, sports, some events, hometown or country, culture and customs.
In any situation, be calm, polite, friendly. Respect your interlocutors. It is worth remembering that all people are different, but sometimes it is this difference that can unite people.
Strive in each person to discern something good and good. No need to pay attention to skin color, social role, status, age of a person. The most important thing in people is their morality, their inner world. Speak warm and kind words to people. This is not difficult at all, and your interlocutors will be pleased.
Share your good mood and positive with others. People see those who know how to enjoy life, and are drawn to them. Problems and difficulties happen in the life of any person. But how to relate to them and overcome them is everyone’s choice.
Try not to get into disputes on every occasion. It repels people. Also, you do not need to participate in gossip and intrigue, to discuss someone behind your back. If you want to impose participation in them, it is better to tactfully leave or switch to something else.
Speak to the point. Before you start to say anything, think not to say too much. Always keep promises, as this is the key to trust. If you can’t fulfill any request, do not promise to refuse tactfully and politely.
Be honest and sincere. It always has people.
Relationship with the child
The problem of fathers and children remains relevant at all times. The question of how to find a common language with the child is asked by each parent at a certain stage of life. At first glance, it seems nothing complicated. After all, this is your child, and you know him all his life. But sometimes he surprises you so much with his actions and thoughts that you stop recognizing him.
It is very important to be able to recognize the feelings of the child. “But we do it!” - many may object. Is it really? Are you sure you are not replacing the child’s real feelings with your perception and sensation? Consider one situation. Mom and baby go home from the store, which is literally a stone's throw away. The child says he is tired. And mother answers: “Do not invent!” Is this like acknowledging a child’s feelings? Result: the child can become isolated in himself and you will no longer be able to find a common language with him. So what should you do? Agree with the child by saying his words out loud. “Yes, not far from the store, but you are tired. I understand".
How to interact with an adult child
The child needs to be helped to understand his feelings so that he can learn to trust his own feelings. There are several ways to help with this.
- Listen carefully to the words of the child. Sometimes just empathy helps.
- Show that you understand him. Do not criticize, do not dispute his words. It can only do harm. "Understand". "I would also be unpleasant / upset / sorry."
- Call feelings by their proper names (pain, resentment, annoyance, irritation, anger, etc.). Do not be afraid, you will not harm them.
- Demonstrate that you heard the desires of the child, and show imagination.
How to get along with someone else's child
There are times when it is necessary to establish contact with someone else's child. For example, you came to visit friends who have children, or you were asked to sit with your child for an hour. Below are some tips on how to behave better with your children in order to make contact.
You should treat the child as an ordinary person, just a little one. Talk to him calmly, in a normal tone, without unnecessary “talk”.
Crouch or bend down to be at eye level.
If you want to praise the child, then it is better to focus on any details of the clothes or the toy, which may be in his hands. Do not touch anything personal, it can make the child more shy.
Talk about his things, toys or books. Play what he wants. Do not impose your games.
Follow some fairly simple tips, and you can easily get along with someone else's child.
How to find an approach to teens
A common language with a teenager is also not always easy to find. But a relationship can be improved. First of all, the child should feel loved, no matter what happens (regardless of grades at school, problems with others, etc.).
It is necessary to make the child understand that parents are the best and most loyal friends. A child should contact his mom and dad with any problem and be sure that he will be supported and will help solve any problem, no matter how difficult it may be.
It is necessary to build trust, discuss not only serious issues, but also everyday affairs. Try to create a friendly, relaxed atmosphere, have fun together. Take an interest in the hobbies of the child, his thoughts and desires. Find time for a heart-to-heart talk. And then your child will trust you, listen to you and value your advice.
Common language in English
Communicating in a foreign language is always difficult. In the modern world, English is very common. It is considered to be international. International conferences, exhibitions, events are usually held in English. Yes, and if you just go on vacation abroad, you will have to deal with communication in English.
There is no need to be afraid that they will not understand you, be friendly, open to communication, follow all the tips regarding finding a common language, and you will not be afraid of any language barrier .