🎒 🥁 🕍 The husband constantly insults and humiliates: the advice of a psychologist. Crisis line of trust for women, free psychological assistance 🛌🏽 🎢 ↙️

Surely every representative of the weaker sex, getting married, dreams of a strong, happy marriage, which will be filled with mutual understanding and love. And at the same time, certainly not a single woman even suspects that over time, her husband can turn into a nervous, always screaming despot. What to do to those whose husband constantly humiliates and insults? The advice of a psychologist will help to understand this difficult situation and find the right solution.

Probable Causes of the Problem

You are a faithful and loving wife, an attentive hostess, a caring mother. Colleagues respect you, you always look after yourself and do not give reasons for jealousy. The husband is always dissatisfied with everything. All sorts of little things can provoke an attack of aggression, which instantly develops into a whole stream of curses and insults. Neither requests, nor tears, nor reciprocal statements - nothing brings results, the situation only worsens. What to do if the husband is constantly humiliating and insulting? The advice of a psychologist will help you find the reason and sort out your tensions with your loved one.

He brought this model of relationships out of his family. A boy brought up in a house in which there is no mutual understanding, and his father is rude to his mother all the time, it is likely to transfer this experience to his own family. Even at a subconscious level, he does not even imagine that a completely different situation can reign in the house.
Jealousy and complexes. Men with lowered self-esteem can assert themselves precisely through psychological violence. According to psychologists, morally suppressing a woman, in his own mind he becomes better. Such men can express themselves sharply to other people. The situation worsens several times if the wife is successful at work. It is in order to suppress her self-esteem, even with her, the sadist uses all kinds of insults.
Problems not related to women. Why does the husband constantly insult? A man who is trying hard not to put his problems on the people around him, as a result, can unconsciously throw out his negativity in the second half. This can also happen because the spouse initially assumes that instead of supporting his wife he will condemn him.
Lack of warm feelings. Psychological violence on the part of men can be explained very simply: stopped loving. The reasons for this may be very different, but as a result it all comes down to one thing: for him, life with an unloved woman turns into real hell. It would seem that there is only one way out of this situation: just sit down and talk with your wife, directly telling her about your feelings. But some men are simply not capable of such an act.
Constant comparison. Psychological sadism is often found in families where the spouse is a “sissy”, who is constantly looking for why his mother is better than his wife. An equally common option is the appearance of a woman on the side, as well as the presence of an ex-spouse. In this case, the husband offends his wife, because he believes that she does not correspond to his ideal. The main advice of a psychologist in this case is not to take the words you hear at your own expense, because this is only his subjective assessment.
The presence of provocations. Yes, dear women, you too are not always angels. Maybe instead of spending time with your husband, you chat with friends for too long or watch melodramas. Or you have a headache too often. In addition, an attack of aggression may be caused by your negative reviews about his relatives, clothing or work. Men with minimal communication skills often throw out everything that has already boiled up in the form of screams and insults. So analyze your own behavior.

Other causes of constant screaming and humiliation

Lack of sexual and emotional satisfaction. Perhaps your husband is deprived of your support, does not feel your feelings and simply does not understand how exactly you relate to him. Any man needs a sensual woman, for the sake of whom he will turn the mountains. And many wives tend to waste their potential on solving the problems of their relatives, friends, and children. It is precisely because of this that in many pairs all sorts of problems often arise. After all, gradually the husband begins to move away from you and throw out his anger, as well as resentment in scandals.
Social unrealization of men. Very often for representatives of the stronger sex it is extremely important to take place as a specialist, to achieve heights and recognition. Only in this case will he be confident in himself and tomorrow. If he chose the wrong job and was not realized, over time the whole stream of his dissatisfaction will pour out on his chosen one.
Stress from the modern rhythm of life. Not all men are able to withstand the difficulties of today's life. If you are in a rush at work, and the boss is vomiting and mosquing, you can add here the same delay in salaries and idle traffic jams, then it is possible that a lot of complaints await you in the evening. In this case, it is very important to understand the features of your spouse. Try to limit it from additional stress. Perhaps he was used to the fact that his shirt is always ironed and waiting for him on the hanger, and borsch, in his opinion, should always be with sour cream. Try to make your husband at home as comfortable as possible.

Husband constantly humiliates and insults - what to do

It’s no secret that every family has all kinds of quarrels and quarrels. And this is normal, because each person has his own character and a certain mood. But if there are no visible reasons why the husband constantly humiliates and insults, the advice of a psychologist will help you understand and understand what to do in this situation.

First of all, think about exactly under what circumstances the husband has an attack of aggression:

he is simply drunk or under the influence of some psychostimulants;
he is absolutely sober;
this happens only in private with you;
it can offend you with a child or strangers.

How to behave properly in such a situation can be understood if you delve into the psychology of relationships.

It is probably hard to understand in the conditions of constant conflicts and discontent if you love your husband, but first of all you should figure out if there is anything to try to save the family for. Or maybe the constant negative simply crossed out all the good that was before.
How do you usually react to aggression, answer in the same way, or, conversely, close yourself.
How often does this swearing happen and what provokes it.
In what condition is the husband in this situation: sober or drunk.
Does he have any serious complexes.

Humiliation from a drunk husband

What to do if the husband constantly insults you when you are drunk? First of all, try to abstract and understand the situation. Remember that alcoholism most often affects people who endure severe and regular stress. Therefore, if your loved one is abusing alcohol, perhaps he lacks your support and inner peace.

It is the desire to hide from reality, the real world, entails the degradation of the individual. At such moments, a person simply does not understand what is happening in his family and on whose side justice is. If your spouse suffers from such addiction, first of all try to help him in the fight against addiction and provide the necessary moral support. If he flatly refuses any help, you have only two options: to change your own attitude to your husband and come to terms with the situation or to break off a painful relationship and leave the sadist.

Husband constantly humiliates and insults what to do

Consequences for the child

You may be surprised, but your children receive the most significant blow from insults and humiliations of the spouse. After all, it really only seems that the child has nothing to do with the conflict. In fact, the mother for children is always and everywhere a defender, and when she is offended, the child loses such a necessary sense of security. As a result, he is subjected to severe stress, which can gradually manifest itself in a craving for sadism, theft, various phobias and other psychological deviations.

If we are talking about the humiliation and insults of a husband with a child, then all psychologists unanimously agree that there is only one way out of the situation: stop everything that happens. And there are a lot of options: starting with all sorts of psychological seminars and ending with a complete break in relations. In each individual situation there may be a way out.

If the husband constantly insults and humiliates: the advice of a psychologist

If you have come to the conclusion that it is not your wrong behavior that provokes the man’s aggression at all, but the desire to return your old feelings is still there, listen to the recommendations of specialists.

At the right time, it’s important to say: “Stop, I won’t continue to scream with screaming.” Do not continue the scandal until the conversation becomes normal.
No need to be like a screaming husband. If, in response to his accusations, a man hears the opposite, for example, how good he is, and you are surprised that such a strong man can even show weakness and raise his voice for a defenseless woman, then his aggression will disappear.
Stop provoking your spouse. If your husband does not like some of your actions or appearance details, try to correct them. True, unless such a correction is a victim for you and does no harm to you.
Try to be considerate. If your spouse is jealous of your success, try to present it as if you achieved everything only thanks to his support.
Refrain from criticizing his tastes, loved ones, friends, work, and in no case focus on his mistakes.

Among other things, pay attention to your husband that his screams hurt you. If your behavior or appearance irritates him, say that you did not want to cause a scandal.

What to watch out for

Under no circumstances should:

so that scandals develop in the presence of a child;
self-closure, bringing the situation to a state in which you simply can’t act;
reconciliation with such a life, if the husband’s rudeness is his constant role.

Action plan

So, you analyzed the events that took place, corrected all the mistakes on your part, being a patient loving wife. If none of the steps you have taken help, use a few tips from a psychologist.

Leave home. Even if you do not plan to break up, your departure can instantly sober up your husband. At least for a week, disappear from his life: stop responding to calls and do not look for a meeting. And returning home, let your spouse understand that a quiet life without his screams suits you much more.
Try to ignore the next bout of his aggression. Leave home or close in another room and wait for it to calm down. Then try to talk normally.
Try to start a dialogue with all your questions in a crowded place. Usually home sadists in public behave calmly.

And here are some tips from psychologists for those whom the husband does not offend very often, or the situation has only worsened recently:

first, put yourself and your thoughts in order, not every man can insult a beautiful, well-groomed woman;
walk with your spouse to places associated with nostalgic shared memories, for example, to where your first dates took place - this method allows you to return feelings to the families that absorbed life;
watch wedding pictures and videos, remember how good you were together.

But what definitely should not be done is to run to friends and complain about the tyrant. If you feel that you feel bad and simply can no longer experience everything that is happening on your own, take advantage of free psychological help.

Dialogue building

How to talk with a husband about a relationship? To do this, just ask a few simple questions.

About children. Ask if he understands that in the future your child can transfer his behavior model to himself. Does he want his son to insult and offend his wife in the same way, or did his daughter suffer all kinds of humiliations as an adult. Does he understand that his children are most likely not only afraid of him, but also hate. Does he know that if a husband insults his wife with a child, then he is in a state of constant stress.
About your relationship. Talk to him about what exactly needs to be done to restore peace and love to your family. Ask if he receives satisfaction from such a life and his actions. Is he impeccable to demand the same from you. And in the end, does he love you.
About him. Find out why your husband chose this method of self-affirmation. Will he be able to change with your support and help. Can someone from the people around him help.

With the help of such a dialogue, you can try to reach the consciousness of your spouse and make him reconsider your relationship. During the conversation, you must remain calm and confident.

When it’s not worth doing anything

In which cases you do not need to try to save the relationship:

the man openly declares the absence of feelings, the reasons can be different, up to the appearance of another woman, it is unlikely to save the family in this case, and it is simply pointless to sacrifice children and oneself;
not only you, but also children have psychological problems;
you dislike your spouse, there is no more love.

And remember the main thing: if you experience fear of your husband, excessive depression, a sense of hopelessness and fear for your child, you can always seek qualified help by calling the crisis line of trust for women. Believe me, any problem can be solved, the main thing is not to despair.

The husband constantly insults and humiliates: the advice of a psychologist. Crisis line of trust for women, free psychological assistance