Today, relationships outside the family, as a rule, are not terrifying. Adultery does not threaten not only with “stoning,” but even with serious condemnation from acquaintances. Nevertheless, such a connection always raises many questions and often provokes serious problems. How to deal with them? What is the relationship with a married man? The advice of a psychologist given later in the article will help answer the questions asked.
What makes a man look for a lover
It is so customary in our society that relations between a man and a woman most often develop on the initiative of a representative of the stronger sex. A woman can make it clear with a smile or a look that she’s not averse to making acquaintance, but it is a man who will take the first steps in this direction.
But sometimes, when the meeting took place and everything went far enough, a woman suddenly finds out that she has an affair with a married man. What to do, and most importantly - why did he start all this?
As psychologists explain, this kind of fault is most often the relationship that has developed (or rather, has not developed) in the family. If a man’s wife is a boss or simply an imperious woman, then she naturally suppresses her partner, and in order not to lose her manhood completely, she starts looking for an outlet on the side.
But it also happens that the wife ceases to worry, the man begins to relate to her, rather, as a relative. Everything in the family suits him, but sex is clearly lacking. This is also a serious reason for adultery.
Why do some ladies want to date married
But what can push a woman or a young lady into such a connection, because she, as it will become clear later, basically does not have a future so expected by most ladies?
Relations with a married man (the advice of a psychologist about which we are considering) for some women are very tempting. Such a gentleman, as a rule, is gallant, knows how to look after beautifully, does not skimp on compliments, gifts and looks more reliable and solid than bachelors of all ages.
And some ladies are motivated by the desire to assert themselves. After all, at home they no longer feel welcome, as before, and relations with her husband are gradually slipping into the field of endless solutions to everyday problems. And here everything is, as in youth!
But there is also a category of women who are specifically looking for relationships that do not have a future. They are pushed to this by childhood experiences - either they grew up in an incomplete family, where the mother was busy with work and could not give due attention to the mental state of the child, or in a complete family, the father treated his daughter detached. In such cases, the girls are afraid to start a family.
The benefits of a relationship with a married man
If you listen to the answer to the question: “Should I continue the affair with a married man?” - advice of a psychologist, it turns out that such a relationship can be very useful for some ladies.
- For young and very poor young ladies, these relationships often turn out to be a way to improve their well-being. True, the main thing here is not to cheapen and agree only on real help and expensive gifts.
- For convinced feminists, such a connection is an opportunity to maintain freedom and independence, while having a permanent sexual partner.
- In addition, a woman who has a married lover, in parallel, can look for a future husband, without rushing at each more or less suitable, as she is satisfied and calm.
- And for married ladies, such relationships can add the thrills that are missing in family life and serve as a confirmation of their unfading feminine attractiveness.
As you can see, with a conscious and calm position in the mentioned connection, both a man and a woman can find a lot of positive and beneficial for both parties.
And now for the cons
But, as you know, most often a lady doesn’t have a happy relationship with a married man. The advice of a psychologist is always the same - do not build illusions when entering into such a relationship. Remember:
- Over time, it becomes increasingly difficult for a woman to realize that her man belongs to another. And imagining him in the arms of his wife, she can even reach a nervous breakdown.
- Sooner or later, the wife will learn about the relationship of the spouse on the side. And this will not lead to anything good.
- It is very difficult to put up with the feeling of a “second violin”, because anyway, for such a man, the family will come first.
- Meetings in fits and starts, for a short time, the inability to spend a vacation together, to celebrate the holidays - all this will make the lover's life very sad, and she will certainly think about whether it is worth maintaining such complex and sometimes humiliating relationships in the future.
Why are married women more likely to meet married ladies?
There is one more nuance, without which it is difficult to understand what exactly the relationship with a married man is made up of. Psychologist’s advice given to women who have reached an impasse with the aforementioned connection contains one important aspect: it turns out that married women are most likely to go on adultery with married women! And, as it turns out, the opportunity to surrender to one’s passion comes to the forefront, practically without risking anything.
- A woman who is free from the bonds of marriage may suddenly not be able to withstand intense expectations and begin to call him or scribble SMS messages at the most inopportune moment. And a lady burdened with her family, as a rule, has neither the opportunity nor the desire for this.
- An unmarried lover may eventually begin to demand that the relationship be legalized - to leave the family and marry her. And for a married woman, they are just a way to get vivid emotions and a special “pepper” in their life.
- The family lady, even having become pregnant from her lover, will bring her walked-up child to her husband. In a similar case, with a lonely, and even a young young lady, you won’t get into trouble!
- Even a married woman needs to be gifted much less often, and how she will explain to her husband the appearance of more and more jewelry!
- In addition, there is not the most offensive option of communication on the side - the ability to pick up a bad disease, because a family woman is often not inclined to change partners and even more so sleep with anyone.
Why is this relationship a married lady?
A man seeks profit, and on what are the relations of a married woman with a married man based? Her psychology is simple - a woman asserts herself or compensates for what she lacks in the family.
Amorous and overly emotional people can easily make new relationships . But most often this happens if the husband is not affectionate enough or is not able to satisfy his partner. And if a woman found that her husband was cheating on her, then the desire to take revenge could throw her into the arms of her lover.
Think about whether you need this relationship?
From all of the above, we hope you understand that a married man, setting off in search of a lover, least of all thinks about creating some kind of serious relationship and dreams only of new sharp feelings and sexual pleasure. That is why the relationship with a married man has no prospects and in the vast majority of cases is doomed to break. So maybe you should avoid it from the very beginning? Well, of course, this does not apply to those who are easily related to such a connection, and those to whom it seems very convenient for some reason.
Yes, if you are planning a relationship with a married man, what you do (to support them or not) will be decided only by you, but remember: too much is put on this altar. Such a relationship can only be short-lived and non-binding. Even if a miracle happens and the lover divorces to marry you, you can only dream of peace: after all, now your spouse can leave you with the same success as soon as she feels the boredom of everyday life - he already has experience!
Long relationship with a married
If, in spite of everything, a woman wants to maintain a long relationship with a married man, the advice of a psychologist will help her learn a few rules that must be followed.
- Never criticize your beloved spouse. Even if he complains about her and talks about some misunderstandings in their life together, the man will react painfully to criticism from his mistress - after all, his wife has long been a part of him, and he constantly feels the connection with her.
- No one should know about your relationship. After all, all this can reach the spouse, and she, believe me, will be able to force her husband to stop what you cherish now.
- Do not put pressure on your lover - men cannot stand this. Instead, constantly tell him how important he is to you and how you love him.
And the last (but perhaps the most important) - you have to become a professional in everything that relates to sex. After all, it was his man who was looking on the side. And if you do not hit your partner with your ingenuity, he will eventually run away from you.
How to break off relations with a married man whom you love?
If you are tired of the uncertainty of your relationship with a married man and decide to break off your relationship with him - do not give in and do not bring the situation to a state where your nerves can not stand it and a loud scandal will break out with beating utensils and a tantrum.
To begin with, imagine that you have achieved what you want - married this man. Will you trust him? But answer this question honestly! Understand that changing times, he will not stop before changing yet. Now to you. And he will tell the new lover the same thing that he “sang” to you, blaming not everything for himself!
Such a man is not capable of resolving conflict situations that arise over time in any family - he follows the easy path, changing partners. Do you need someone who runs away as soon as the problem is ripe? If not, then part with him. Keep meetings to a minimum, and then completely stop answering his calls. However, if you feel the cold, this womanizer will quickly disappear - after all, as you already know, he is not used to solving problems!
A few words in the end
We hope to answer the question "how to end a relationship with a married man", the psychologist's advice given above will help you. If you are waiting for real feelings, then it is important to understand how hopeless this connection is and the humiliating position of a lover. You deserve to be an object of true love, and not a toy in the hands of a man waiting only for pleasure. Do not waste time, look for your real half! Good luck