Each person has a unique set of personal qualities. It is for this reason that all people are individual. It is important to note that not all personality traits are equally useful. Some of them can be fought over the years, as if with bad habits. But the individual is not always capable of sensibly analyzing all his personality traits, and some of them may simply be invisible. In this article, we will talk about vulnerability and find out how it affects a person’s life.
Vulnerable or just touchy?
A vulnerable person is a person who reacts very sharply to various remarks and reproaches in his direction. They are hurt, they hurt almost everything that they don’t like or don’t want to hear for any reason. Quite often, people think that a touchy and vulnerable person is one and the same thing. However, in reality it turns out that these are completely different concepts. So, the touchy person is inclined to take offense at various trifles and to carry this feeling in himself for many years. A vulnerable person tries to protect himself from unnecessary injuries. He does not hold resentment against others, but rather deeply experiences what he has heard or seen. Such people are prone to introspection. They can “dig in themselves” for a long time, look for flaws and analyze them. So, if a touchy person expresses his discontent and aggression towards the offender, then the vulnerable tries to protect himself from any kind of unpleasant cases.
Why does a person become vulnerable
There are two groups of properties that form the structure of personality: innate and acquired qualities. The first - with which a person is already born, and the second - accumulate throughout life. But some personality traits can be both innate and acquired. How does this happen?
As a rule, the vulnerability manifests itself in childhood is especially noticeable. Children react very sharply to various kinds of remarks and reproaches. It is rare to meet a child who, without internal feelings, perceives claims in his favor. Of course, it is very important to explain to the baby that the fact that he is scolded does not mean at all that he is not loved. Also, you can’t tell him that he is bad, instead, it is worth pointing out that he is doing bad things, but the baby himself is very good. The child should feel that his parents love him anyway. In such an atmosphere, the child's vulnerability will soon pass, and he will grow into a strong personality. A baby who has not received love from his parents most often grows up as a vulnerable person. This is reflected in his communication with people around him and in relationships with loved ones.
So it turns out that children's vulnerability, which must pass over time, does not disappear anywhere and pursues a person already in adulthood. Although in reality the situation with parents is only one of many factors that influence the formation of personality. Relations with friends, teachers and other people also leave its mark on character. It is very difficult for a vulnerable sensitive person to cope with his emotions, and often he blames himself for everything that happens to him. Wise parents should teach the child that openness and sincerity are wonderful qualities, but you should not open your soul to everyone.
How is vulnerability manifested?
A vulnerable person is one who is very easily hurt. He pays great attention to what people around him say. Constant introspection leads to the fact that the self-esteem of such a person is further reduced. Experts in the field of psychology believe that vulnerability is another way of self-defense. It is, especially if it is an acquired quality.
Acute forms of vulnerability easily develop into depressive states. Of course, the best way to study your personal qualities is to turn to a good psychologist, but it is not always possible to do this. Then you just need to carefully analyze your behavior and try to get rid of qualities that, in your opinion, seem negative. Consider how to do this.
What is the secret of vulnerability
An easily vulnerable person, as a rule, is very kind, open, honest. He is very good to everyone around him and expects a response from them. He is trying to be more kind, but often gets insults or ridicule in return. A vulnerable person must understand that his soul is a temple, only the elite can enter. It should be the same kind and open people, like himself. Unfortunately, without the extrasensory abilities, it is difficult to understand what kind of person is standing in front of you: kind and honest or false and rude. People so skillfully “wear masks” and hide their essence, that it is difficult to determine who is who. For this reason, you need to try not to open to people with all your heart. You can communicate with them, but as they say, "keep them at a distance."
Methods for reducing emotional sensitivity
Why does a vulnerable person suffer so much? Of course, because he is too sensitive to the words and actions of other people in relation to him. You can fix this. First you need to write for yourself all your positive qualities and remember them well. You should think that when someone says something bad about you, it should not concern you. This is only the opinion of a stranger, and everyone has every right to him. Try to avoid people with whom you are in constant conflict. To receive “injuries” from a person and continue to communicate with him constantly is more like masochism. In order to reduce emotional sensitivity, you need to raise your own self-esteem and not pay attention to the actions and words of strangers.
Parable for vulnerable people
There is one parable that can tell a lot about such people. Its essence lies in the fact that one kind and sympathetic girl comes to the old man and asks him why everyone is mocking and quarreling with her. After listening to the beauty, the old man gives her very ridiculous at first glance advice. He invites her to walk around the city completely naked. Of course, the girl refuses such a strange offer. But the old man explains to her that just as she is shy of a naked body, she must act with her soul. You can not open to everyone. Angry and vicious people cannot accept that the girl is so pure and kind, and therefore they offend and injure her with unpleasant words. The sage advised the beauty not to let everyone in her life and to leave lying and rude people.
Summing up, we can say that vulnerable people are very kind and open. Dealing with emotional sensitivity is difficult, but possible. To do this, pay less attention to people around you and not open your heart to them ahead of time.