Raising a child is not an easy job. It requires parents moral and physical strength, stamina, wisdom, the ability to sacrifice their desires for the needs of the child.
This path begins very early, as soon as the baby begins to walk independently, learns to eat, perform simple hygienic procedures. By the age of three, the baby is aware of itself as a separate individual from his mother and father. This is where the problems that psychologists call the crisis of three years of age begin.
This period of the baby’s life is extremely important. Of course, everything that happens to the child is important. But for three-year-olds, any detail, any word, reaction of parents has a special meaning.
Parenting difficulties
The first five to six years of the baby’s life are of the greatest educational importance, are the foundation of its harmonious full development. It is during this period that moral, physical, mental qualities are formed. If parents build the wrong educational model, then it will gain a foothold and turn the life of the family into an endless conflict. By school age, a child will grow out of a wonderful baby, who will not need to be educated, but re-educated.
Parents of a child who has reached the age threshold of three years, very easily answer the question, what are the difficulties of raising children? Most often, the list of problems includes the following items:
- negative reaction to any offer;
- stubbornness;
- inattention;
- restlessness;
- irritability, nervousness;
- tendency to tantrums in public places.
All these are signs of an age crisis. The child seeks to confirm his identity, refuses the help of adults. It is no less difficult for it than for exhausted parents and tantrums: the baby does not understand what is happening to him, why he is constantly blamed, everyone is forbidden, taken away, punished.
How to raise a whim
It is hardly possible to survive the crisis of three years without any problems. Even the wisest parents, who are not the first baby to grow up, from time to time experience certain difficulties in raising children.
How to help a little person? First of all, be patient. And then - work, work and work. A prerequisite for proper education is goodwill, firmness, consistency. Under the ban authoritarian tone, orders and punishments. Of course, excessive democracy should not be allowed: the child is not yet at the age to make independent decisions. But to guide him gently, but persistently, constantly cheering, praising for his success and not to get stuck on misses is a must.
Daily communication with the child is of utmost importance. At the age of three, the active socialization of the baby begins : he goes to kindergarten. Some children easily endure a change of scenery and a long separation from their mother, while others experience stress, which they cannot get rid of for a very long time. Of course, this adaptation period is accompanied by crying, negativity, tantrums. It is necessary to devote as much time as possible to the child: to go to the park on weekends, consider the world around and discuss what he saw, actively move on the street and play quiet home games, read and draw, and sculpt something from plasticine together. And constantly talk with the baby: tell stories, read poetry, explain the rules of communication with other children and adults, encourage active talking, evaluate the world around.
The parenting style should be built in accordance with the following principles:
- reasonable exactingness;
- promotion of autonomy;
- development of physical and mental activity;
- constant cooperation.
If there was a public hysteria, you need to maintain Olympic calm. In no case should you give in to the requirements of the baby - this will not help prevent the subsequent actions of the stubborn. A secluded place where there are no spectators, a calm tone, patience - this is what is needed to stop the demonstration of disobedience. In any case, the child should feel love, support.
Different approaches to education
In the process of raising a child, parents often encounter different understandings of goals and . Some of the parents are too soft, while others allow themselves sharpness and slapping. All this comes from the family where the parents grew up. If mom and dad do not agree, quarrels are inevitable. Very often they turn into scandals and can end in divorce. And what about the baby? He will grow up nervous, shy, aggressive or weak-willed. The level of anxiety in such a child horrifies psychologists.
There are frequent conflicts between parents and grandmothers. The former try to once and for all determine the boundaries that should not be violated, and the latter easily override all the rules. Well, what's wrong with feeding a child chocolate, letting him lie down later, letting him eat in front of the TV? In fact, such disagreements also lead to sad consequences, causing serious difficulties in raising a child.
Unified requirements supported by all family members - this is what needs to be achieved. Disputes and conflicts are unacceptable, because the child is closely monitoring what is happening. He is not able to take the side of one parent, because he loves both. Watching the parents quarrel over him, the child experiences tremendous psychological pressure and unjustified guilt. And this is a mental trauma that can distort the fate of the baby.
That is why it is so important to come to an agreement. Proper education, based on respect and love of all family members for each other, will solve all the difficulties.