Fear is a normal human reaction to danger. The self-preservation instinct helps people avoid death. But in children the situation is a little different. The instinct of self-preservation in them is laid down by nature, but parents, if improperly educated, can inspire the child with numerous unconscious fears. How to rid a child of them? Read about it below.
Causes
Any reason has its effect. And you need to understand it. It makes no sense to eliminate the consequence. If the reason is not worked out, then all efforts will be wasted. Before answering the question of how to rid a child of fears, you need to understand the reasons. What are they like?
- Hyperopec. A child whose parents constantly care about the health of their child does not know the true danger. He understands that the world is not as simple as it seems. The fears of the parents are transmitted to the baby. The child is worried that the world is dangerous and knowing it can lead to disaster. The children's psyche is vulnerable, and hyperprotection can play a cruel joke with it, making the child sandwiched and notorious.
- Lack of activity. The consequence of hyper-custody of parents is the constant presence of the child in the house or apartment. The baby will develop normally only if adults allow the child to move more. The child needs to learn the world independently. Having fallen once, the baby will no longer climb a tree. A ban on climbing a tree can be fraught with disobedience. Misunderstanding of the cause and effect will make the child underdeveloped.
- Lack of attention. Parents should spend a lot of time developing their child. It is foolish to put bans without arguing them. The child must understand what he should not do and why. If parents do not engage in raising a child, and entrust this process to television, the result will be disastrous.
- Psychologically tense family situation. A child who is constantly under stress due to poor adult relationships will live in eternal fear. Kids perceive the world a little differently than adults. The child considers himself the center of the universe. And if dad and mom are quarreling, the child thinks that the quarrel happened precisely because of him.
Kinds
Fears are different. Some of them are quite justified, while others are the result of a stormy imagination. How to relieve a child of fears? You should deal with the type of fears of the baby.
- Justified fears. A child who is bitten by a dog, for obvious reasons, will be afraid of this type of animal. If the baby gets lost in the market or in the square, he can get confused and endure severe stress. Subsequently, such a child will be afraid of crowded places. Such fears need to be worked out to help the baby develop normally.
- Unreasonable fears. Parents may not always explain the reason why a child is disliked by certain things. For example, a new jumpsuit, which my mother bought after spending most of her salary, the baby may refuse to wear. The child cannot explain the reason for his dislike. The same thing can happen with some toys, which the child will be afraid to approach.
- Overvalued fears. A developed fantasy can play a cruel joke with a child. Many children are afraid to fall asleep in the dark, since it will seem to them that ghosts fill the room. A similar reaction to a dark room occurs in cases where parents greatly scare the child with the advent of Babayka or other fairy-tale characters.
Confidential conversation
Children's psyche lends itself to suggestion. How to relieve a child of fears? One of the effective ways is a frank conversation. Parents need to communicate more with their child. This is the only way to penetrate into the inner world of a child. If the parents and the baby have a trusting relationship, then the baby will gladly share with adults what scares him. The child considers the parents omnipotent. It is not surprising that the child will think that mom will be able to cope with all the problems. Such an attitude will greatly facilitate the process of treating fears, whatever their cause. Namely, it needs to be recognized in the process of conversation. In no case can not laugh at the fear of the child. Otherwise, the baby will be closed in itself and will no longer open. Take what the child says seriously.
Trust but check
If the baby says that he saw a monster under the bed, tell him that you will help drive the evil creature away. How to relieve a child of fears and anxieties? Act by persuasion. Before going to bed, examine the entire space under the bed and prove to the baby that there is nothing there. If the child insists that the monster comes only in the dark, turn off the light and repeat the same procedure, examining the room with a flashlight. After that, put the child to bed and say that there is nothing to fear.
Soft suggestion
Choosing the right technique, it is very simple to relieve the child of fears. The advice on how to save the baby from unnecessary worries will be as follows: gently inspire the child that fear, which creeps into the soul from time to time, can simply be locked up or sent to the north pole. For example, the baby is afraid of ghosts. Talk with the child and find out in which cartoons he saw such creatures. Ask the child to imagine the ghost as clearly as possible, and then let the child portray the North Pole in his imagination. Icebergs, permafrost and white snow, and against the background of this picture - an image of nightmares. Tell the child that in such conditions no creature can survive, neither living nor mythical. Therefore, a ghost from fears should freeze and turn into a block of ice. Explain to the baby that fear is frozen, now it is no more. Such games work well with those children who are endowed with a rich imagination.
Draw fear
To get rid of the problem, psychologists advise describing it. In the case of a child, this system can be upgraded. Have your child draw his fear. We will analyze this technique using an example. How to save a child from fear of the dark? The night itself is not scary. Children are frightened by creatures that fill the dark space. The child must draw his fear on a piece of paper. This may be a monster who lives under the bed, or Baba Yaga, who comes at night for naughty children. When the image loomed, you need to draw another picture with the child. The kid needs to portray a beautiful night with a starry sky. It’s good if the drawing is based on real events. For example, on a family trip to the forest. Night, bonfire, tents and trees. From such a picture it blows warm and calm. When the child realizes that the night is not as terrible as it seemed to him, one more drawing should be drawn, but this time not one room, but the whole house. Let the baby pretend to be sleeping on the bed, parents sleeping peacefully in the next room, and the cat that guards the family’s sleep. Hang this picture in the baby’s room and show it to the child every day before bedtime.
Burn fear
The previous technique can be slightly modernized. How to relieve a child of fears? Psychologist's advice will be like that. After the baby has portrayed his fear, it needs to be burned. Make a ritual burning of the picture with the whole family. Say that the monster who lived under the bed will now burn, and will no longer appear. This fact must be confirmed by all adults. Entrust the kid with matches, and let him personally set fire to a piece of paper. The ritual will be taken seriously by the child.
A similar technique can be used to eliminate any fear. For example, parents who do not know how to save their child from the fear of a thunderstorm should ask the child to make a drawing and then burn it. Do not disregard any fear of your baby, do not neglect them, otherwise, fears can develop into a phobia.
Do not worry yourself
Most fears are instilled in children by their parents. If your child is afraid of something, think about whether you inspired fear in the baby. How to rid a child of fear of insects? Mom, who is neglecting insects, will inspire the baby that you should not touch these nasty insects, they will be able to bite. The child trusts his mother, so he will try to bypass any insects that are twisted at home or on the street. In this situation, the mother of the child needs to reconsider her own position, regarding bugs, spiders, etc. If a woman will take everything more calmly, then the child’s fear will weaken and completely disappear.
Desensitization method
It is difficult to eliminate those fears that have a real basis. How to save a child from the fear of dogs? The desensitization method should be used. It is better to carry out a similar procedure with a qualified psychologist, but if it is not possible to make an appointment with a specialist, you can conduct a similar game at home. The essence of therapy is to create a situation that causes fear. A child who is bitten by a dog will be terribly afraid of the four-legged friends of a person. Let one of the relatives, for example, dad, depict a dog. Mom and her child must lose the normal behavior. For example, to walk past a dog without reacting to it in any way or stroking an animal that fits with friendly intentions. The baby should be explained that the dogs themselves are not afraid, if he does not hurt them, then no animal will attack the child for no reason.