Gossip is a common occurrence in groups. By spreading rumors, people are trying to raise their self-esteem at someone else’s expense, but usually this “achievement” does not change them from the inside - gossipers have to be content with discussing someone else’s life. After all, rumors do not bring novelty into one's own being, being only one of the types of vice.
True Causes of Bone Washing
Quotes about rumors are very popular, because many suffer from gossip. Why do people gossip? One of the main reasons is the inability to occupy oneself. He who has nothing to do is wasting his precious time washing the bones of others. He likes to discuss people, he has a certain feeling of involvement in someone else's life and a feeling of greater fullness of his own. Therefore, those who spread rumors can rightfully be called loafers. Here is what Alisher Navoi writes:
Anyone who connects his lying word with someone, smears his black face with oil.
Gossips are unable to fill their own lives with bright colors, and all they can do is be an energy parasite, feeding on energy from the events of someone else's life. At the same time, positive aspects or good deeds are discussed less often. Girls, for example, are spreading rumors that a lady from their circle has become very stout (or lost weight), plans to divorce (or get married), have a baby.
Gossip Men
Men are no less gossip than ladies. They can even fumble about their close friends, discussing how lucky they are in life (otherwise they could not have achieved anything) or how bad things they have with women. Yanush Vishnevsky in a quote about rumors and gossip writes:
Men gossip no less than women. Only they call it "the exchange of trusting information, maintaining contacts with the right people, lobbying or politics."
As you can see, the stronger sex loves to embellish everything that applies to it, and give these phenomena more specious names. According to Vishnevsky, gossip in the male environment is called "exchange of information" or "maintaining contacts." The same thing is observed in other areas. For example, if a woman gets angry, she will be called a hysterical person. If a man loses control over his emotions, then they will say about him that he has flared up.
What is discussed in gossip
Here is what Bertrand Russell says in his quote about the rumors:
No one gossips about the secret virtues of other people.
It is unlikely that anyone will “secretly” tell their friend or acquaintance that his neighbor had children enrolled at Harvard University, or that his work colleague finally received the long-awaited promotion. Discussing only the bad is the whole point of real gossip. To indulge in this vice or to refrain from it - everyone decides for himself. But it’s worth remembering that the one who gossips first of all represents himself in a certain light. And this image is not always full of nobility.
Maupassant's words
The writer Guy de Maupassant reveals an interesting fact:
Gossip is a comfort to women who are no longer loved and who are no longer cared for.
Thus, it is often women who gossip who do not have a personal life. Spreading rumors is the way in which they behave like parasites, unable to create anything new.
To stop gossiping, they need to make an effort on themselves and direct internal energy to develop and improve other areas of life. Maupassant is right - in the absence of her personal life, a woman cannot be completely happy, and therefore she needs “comfort”. But it doesn’t always have to be gossip. After all, there are much more other, much more useful and interesting activities in the world.
And here is what Eric Jong writes in his quote about the rumors:
Gossip is the opium of the oppressed.
Rumors really help, like opium, temporarily forget about their troubles. But they can hardly be called a solution to the psychological problem for the most gossiping one - after all, to spread the rumors you don't need to work on yourself or nobility.
Gossip only about prominent personalities
This is the most important negative moment of the rumors. They are spread only about bright and interesting personalities, while emphasizing precisely their shortcomings, and not their merits. Therefore, those who gossip about, you can not worry - this means that their life can not be called gray or unattractive. For example, in his quote about the rumors, Theodor Dreiser writes:
Nowadays, they do not gossip only about those about whom there is nothing to say.
But for gossip victims, such an argument cannot serve as a full consolation. Most people don’t like it when they talk about them behind their backs, speaking only good things in their faces. But it is also important how the person himself relates to the fact discussed by others. If he himself condemns himself for a certain act or character trait, then gossip will further provoke a feeling of guilt, a tendency to self-flagellation.
Gossip speed
Another minus of gossip is that they spread very quickly. Here is what Virgil said in his quote about the rumors:
Rumor is a disaster, faster than which there is nothing in the world.
Indeed, gossip can rightly be called a natural disaster, which is spreading at a tremendous speed. It is almost impossible to stop this flow, especially in large teams. All that a person has the strength to do is to be guided by reason and not to believe empty rumors that mutate, passing from mouth to mouth. And what was discussed at the beginning may be completely different from the final version. As Baurzhan Toyshibekov points out in his quote about the rumors:
Hearing is born by a mouse, and dies by an elephant.
Most will be very pleased if they say extremely good things about us behind their backs, but, as you know, they say only about the dead. Therefore, we must be prepared that someone wants to say something disgusting about us and laugh. The most important thing in this situation is exactly how you feel about the fact under discussion. If for some act you yourself are not averse to condemning yourself, then, of course, condemning others will only add fuel to the fire of self-flagellation.
Quote by Bernard Shaw
Here's what Bernard Shaw writes about rumors:
Most people are interested in the fact that they are completely not concerned.
That which does not concern a person at all, and in no way relates to his life, often becomes an object for gossip. The reason for this is the same - the inability to fill your life with more valuable and interesting things.
Exposure of rumors
Condemning this vice is sometimes as futile as trying to show such people how versatile life can be - anyway, they prefer to wash the bones to their friends or colleagues, not caring about their own problems. Although Guy Suetonius Tranquill in his quote about the rumors indicates the need to condemn gossip, and thereby at the root to prevent their spread:
He who does not condemn slanderers encourages them.
And here is what Thales of Miletus says:
Expel a person whispering slander against others.
Therefore, it is necessary to punish those who spread gossip. Perhaps revelation will help them see the negative side of the discussion of their neighbors.
The best quotes about rumors and envy behind
Here is what Oleg Roy writes about rumors:
In women's groups, the main points that glue people together are envy and rumors.
This is one of the peculiarities of women's groups - “to be friends against” someone. Of course, there are exceptions to the rules, where ladies can stand up for each other and relate to each other according to the norms of Christian morality. In other words, so what attitude do they expect for themselves. But Oleg Roy correctly observes that envy and rumors are inevitable in women's groups. And this is one of their negative traits.
And here is what Seneca says in his quote about rumors and envy:
Those only blasphemed, who are not worth envy.
The opinion of the philosopher largely reflects the truth already mentioned - only those people are washed with bones whose life is of interest to the public. Unfortunately, this cannot be avoided: all that can be done with dirty gossip is simply to close their eyes to them.
Some more interesting quotes
Phrases and aphorisms about rumors - a huge amount. Of these, everyone can choose the most interested:
From gossip you can learn a lot about gossipers. Leszek Kumor.
As for those empty words that people say about us, we should pay no more attention to them than the dome of the old church draws attention to the crow circling around it. George Eliot
What good is egoists? They do not discuss other people. George Carlin
Gossip is like counterfeit money: decent people do not make it themselves, but only pass it on to others. Claire Booth Luce
Such quotes about rumors and gossip behind your back will help to clarify the meaning of this unpleasant phenomenon. Rumors carry a lot of bad things, even the Bible says so. The Book of Books states that gossip kills three at once: the person who told her, the listener, and the bone-washing facility. Quotes about rumors behind him reveal the psychology of this unpleasant phenomenon.