How do you behave in society? Are you trying to be a cultured and amiable person? Have you paid attention to your manner of communication? This is a very important component of how you impress others. How to behave in order to look smart, interesting and charming?
Definition
The manner of communication is a multi-component image. What does it consist of? From the timbre of the voice, from the ability to control your speech, facial expressions and gestures. The interlocutor gives his opponent an assessment not only on the basis of his speeches, but also on the basis of how a person holds. In 10 minutes of personal communication with a person, you can find out much more about her than in six months of correspondence. People can make a good impression with their behavior, or they can spoil the picture of themselves. And here the big role is played not by the content of the speeches, but their design. Sometimes it’s much more pleasant to talk with a cute fool than with a speculative intellectual.
Communication styles
An image that a person intentionally or unintentionally demonstrates is a manner of communication. In different situations, a person can wear different guises. They are called communication styles. What are they like?
- Disparaging. A person who wants to show his contempt for the interlocutor will demonstrate this in a mocking tone or sheer coldness of behavior. Neglect is seen when one person tries to quickly end the conversation, as he considers his interlocutor an unworthy type, and you should not communicate with him.
- Comic. This style of communication is popular with friends. Friends can make fun of each other, throw jokes and laugh together at the inconvenience.
- Serious. In a conversation with a person, one can judge his manners. The communication style chosen by the interlocutor can tell a lot about him. If your opponent is not joking and does not give in to provocations, he wants to appear before you in the guise of a serious person. This style of communication is preferable to the business world.
- Flirty. A girl who talks to a pretty young man can openly flirt with him. This style of communication is appropriate for both unfamiliar people and friends. But you need to keep in mind the environment in which the conversation takes place.
- Friendly. Two people who feel mutual sympathy will talk to each other in a friendly tone. They will begin to joke, ask questions and listen carefully to the interlocutor.
- Business. This style of communication can be found in any organization. Subordinates in a business style communicate with their superiors, and those, in turn, with the directors of the company.
Types of communication
The manner of communication is an indicator of a person’s upbringing. A person who knows how to behave in society demonstrates his good upbringing and education. What are the types of communication?
- Direct. When two people communicate with each other, a dialogue arises between them. This type of communication is the most common. Direct communication is not only a dialogue, but also a discussion. For example, at a conference of the board of directors, each of those present has the right to express their opinion on the topic raised.
- Indirect. This type of communication is much less common. The dialogue of two persons or the conversation of several people among themselves occurs through an intermediary. Usually this happens when the interlocutors communicate in different languages and use the services of an interpreter. But it also happens that people communicate in their native language through an intermediary. Such an incident can happen to those persons who seriously quarreled and cannot bear each other's societies.
Image and manner of communication
The way a person keeps himself can tell a lot about him. When he picks up or develops an image for himself, he should not lose sight of his manner of communication. For example, a girl who wants to deserve to become a significant person in the men's business must behave seriously. Coquettish behavior will not give her a chance for her interlocutors to perceive her as a business partner. The image of a modern person, language, speech, manner of communication - all this is interconnected. Look at how a person behaves, and you can definitely say about his profession. After all, it is the sphere of activity that leaves its mark on the person. For example, a successful manager will remain free in any company. He will not be shy to get to know people and speak frankly with them. But a person who works with documents, and not with people, can be a closed person. Such a person will be difficult to bring to a dialogue.
Manners of business communication
Which person do you think is serious? Such persons have a good understanding of the correct manner of communication. A person who wants to be taken seriously will try to look serious. His gestures will be open, but his eyes and voice will be harsh and domineering. In this way, the person will express their self-confidence. A person who wants to succeed in the business world must be able to remain calm in any situation and not succumb to all kinds of provocations. Manners of communication of a business person are reduced to friendliness, frankness, open gestures, confident movements and powerful intonation. Communicating with such a person will be pleasant, but at the same time scary. The interlocutor will think that his opponent is higher and stronger. Moreover, this business person should inspire at a subconscious level, and at a conscious level, the conversation should be easy and enjoyable.
Good communication
What are the ways of communication? For each look and style, they will be different. But the most classic division is the good and the bad. What manners can be called good?
- Correct speech. A person who speaks well deserves the attention of others. It's so interesting to talk with, he can tell you something interesting. And if such a person tells ordinary things, his speech will be music, as it is correct.
- Politeness. Good manners of communication are laid in childhood. Communication on “you” with strangers, the ability not to interrupt and hear what the interlocutor says is in honor today.
- Courtesy. You need to be not only polite, but also loyal. Keep in mind that not all interlocutors have an opinion on the same issue. If your opponent does not agree with your arguments, do not try to convince him of anything, let him remain with his opinion.
- Listening skills. Etiquette and manners of communication are based on mutual respect. You should not only listen to the interlocutor, but also hear what he says. Most people do not know how to do this. They are waiting for a pause in the interlocutor’s speech to talk about themselves.
Bad manners
- Keep yourself in the spotlight. A man likes to talk about himself. But if you want to be a polite person, then this is not worth it. Talk about others. Let them feel that you are not indifferent to their opinion and their life history.
- Gossip. Want to be known as a cultured person? Then get rid of the gossip habit. Do not pass on the rumors to others and interrupt the interlocutor if he will tell you unreliable facts from the life of your mutual friends.
- Mat. A person’s culture is known by the way he speaks. If a person cannot connect two words without a mat, then this person’s vocabulary is surprisingly poor.
- The raised tone. If you want to earn the trust and sympathy of a person, you should not go on screaming. You can prove your opinion in a quiet and calm tone. If a person breaks down, it means that he has run out of arguments and uses the only remaining means - intimidation of the opponent.
- Neglect Do not show the person that he is unpleasant to you, it is ugly. All people had different upbringing and different destinies. Do not treat a person who is less fortunate than you.
Facial expressions and gestures
How does a person communicate information to the interlocutor? He transmits some part verbally and the other non-verbally. Facial expressions and gestures sometimes speak more eloquently than words. Manners of communication with people can be developed consciously. Of course, at first it will be difficult to control non-verbal signals. But over time, you can train your gestures. For example, when you communicate with strangers to you, on a subconscious level, you want to close yourself from them. But you should not go on about your body, do not cross your arms or legs. Take open postures. Thanks to this simple trick, you will feel relaxed and your interlocutors will perceive you as a confident and sociable person. If something amazes you in the opinion of your opponent, you do not need to draw it on your face. Bright facial expressions are appropriate when talking with friends, but not when communicating among unfamiliar people. Some individuals may perceive your dumbfounded appearance as a disagreement with their life position.
Person's character
How much can you learn about the person in front of you? The manners of communication will present you the interlocutor much better than he can do it himself. If a person speaks loudly, while smiling and is not afraid to ask awkward questions, it means that you have an easy-going person who has a bold character and a cheerful disposition. A person who speaks in a low voice and looks into the ground is an insecure person who is clearly uncomfortable in your society. A person who speaks loudly and does not give you the opportunity to speak out is an avid person with leadership habits.
Purpose of communication
Why do people talk and how does this affect the way they communicate? By the way your opponent presents himself to you, you can understand the goal that he wants to achieve through dialogue. If a guy speaks in a courteous tone with a girl, then he wants to make a closer acquaintance with her. If a person speaks to you in a businesslike manner, then he just needs to find out some information from you. A person who will make fun of you can pursue several goals: to rise at your expense in the company, make people laugh, or to cheer you up. Of course, the purpose of communication should be considered in a specific context and understand how familiar the opponents are.
How to develop good manners of communication?
Education should begin in childhood. Manners of communication need to be inculcated in children from infancy. How to do this?
- Read more. The reading person has a wider vocabulary compared to the person who receives information from the Internet or television.
- Listen to the interlocutor. You need to accustom yourself and your children to listen to your opponent. You must understand what kind of thought the interlocutor wanted to convey to you, and only after that form his own remark. Many people cannot understand such simple rules of the game, and therefore it is difficult to talk to them.
- Keep track of gestures. Use your hands while talking. Do not be afraid to actively gesticulate. Your wide gestures will show the interlocutor that you are an open person who longs for communication.
- Follow the speech. Be sure to think about what you are saying. Learn to match words. Clear your speech of the mat and parasitic words.
- Keep track of intonation. Never raise your voice. Work with your key, find the middle and talk on it.