How to refuse a man: reasons for rejection, the correct wording of words, the choice of a good moment and the advice of psychologists

Although the desire to have a happy family is embedded in a person, not always a woman wants new acquaintances. Moreover, quite often there is no need for intimacy. That is why more and more girls are interested in how it is beautiful to refuse a man. The answer to this question depends on three factors: what goal do you want to achieve with your refusal, what you refuse and who offers. Let's start by parsing goals.

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In fact, all women are different. There are those who refuse to force a man to ask for more. Perhaps this is the strangest type of fair sex. Why?

First of all, a man is not a submissive dog who, at the first call, must run somewhere, headlong. Often they want a direct answer to a question and move on. Often on the Web you can meet dissatisfied young women who are perplexed, why did the beloved one year ago offer her to marry, and today he goes to the registry office with another. But all because the girl was trying to get her own price. She said “no,” but, as one proverb says, “no” and there is no trial. Even the most weak-minded man is waiting for directness, and he deserves it.

Nevertheless, many believe that there is nothing wrong with this kind of game. At the end of the article, you can learn about how to refuse a man so that “no” is perceived as “yes”. For now, let's look at a few more reasons for rejection.

don't like boy

Attempt to humiliate

Some pick up interesting options for how to refuse a man, only to show their dominant position. Of course, in modern society they are more surprised when a man is the main one in a relationship, but you must admit that it is not so easy for women to be at the helm. No wonder they say that when a woman marries, she becomes married - to her husband. Therefore, to seem stronger, taller, more courageous is at least a strange idea.

For those who want to humiliate a man by their refusal, there is an interesting recommendation of psychologists. Its essence boils down to the fact that this method of self-affirmation only emphasizes the failure and lack of maturity of the fair sex. So is it worth it to prove something to someone in this way? This is an important question.

Different ways

The most common reason for a woman to refuse a man is banal incompatibility. Often, from the very beginning of the formation of a girl, she clearly presents the image of her desired life partner. The girl roughly knows what character traits a man should possess and what should not be in him.

Therefore, when receiving an offer of any content from a man who does not fit her framework, one should not be surprised at the refusal. It is a pity, however, that sometimes men get a refusal much better than those that fit the ideal of a girl.

how to refuse a man

What do they offer

To figure out how to correctly refuse a man, you need to understand what exactly he wants. Some unfairly claim that they all have “one thing on their minds,” but, as numerous polls show, this is far from the case.

The fact is that not always by the offer to drink coffee is meant something else. Often a man wants to get to know the girl better, and the only reasonable way to do this is to invite him to drink coffee or go to the movies.

At the same time, if a man in this formulation implies something else, this can be recognized. Often the cavalier’s intimate intentions are clearly captured in a playful tone, posture and gestures. Such men often try to resort to the simplest physical contact through stroking and light touches.

However, often, regardless of the intentions of the young man, the girl nevertheless fights back with a refusal. How to refuse a man competently?

Why rejection is misunderstood

Often, no matter how hard a woman tries, all her “no” are perceived solely as “yes”. Why? There are a number of reasons for this:

  1. Softness.
  2. Fear of offending or hurting feelings.
  3. Tact.
  4. Evasiveness.

Often a mild answer is perceived as an attempt to gain a price. The man who received the slurred "Well, I kind of ... This is the most ... I don’t know" does not hear "No!" This is a loud “Try again!”, Just said in the wrong language. In this case, how to politely refuse a man and be understood correctly?

Definitely, one should not forget about “body language”. If at failure the girl straightens her hair, crosses her legs, plays with a shoe, “casually” touches the interlocutor, licks her lips and so on, then the man simply does not take her words seriously.

refuse without flirting

Easiest method

The easiest way to refuse is to calmly say: "No, I do not care!" The voice in this case should not be guilty or making excuses. No tender words, pity in the voice or concern should be in the refusal. Let your whole look and tone show your mood to reject the received proposal.

If you doubt that you can force yourself not to make excuses, then after a firmly said phrase you must leave. Yes, some may find this too dramatic, but it’s actually a great way to reduce stress and reduce the likelihood of succumbing to possible pressure. Why?

Everything is simple. No matter how severe your “no” may be, indecision, which is almost impossible to hide, may give reason to begin to convince you of the fallacy of your decision.

how to refuse an uninteresting man

Why not ?!

Often, to the categorical “no” you can hear the child’s question “Why?”. Remember, you are not required to answer it, and you have a number of reasons for this:

  • No one has the right to delve into your soul.
  • The answer "No" is enough for any proposal.
  • This is your comfort zone, why let someone into it.

It may seem to some ladies that to say the treasured three-letter word and go into the sunset is boring and uninteresting. Then you can try differently.

If you have known each other for a long time

Some have to look for options on how to refuse a man who was not accepted for the opposite sex. This is more complicated than with a stranger. Usually at the time of the proposal to be together or go to bed with a young man, there is already a certain relationship, and often you don’t really want to lose them.

In this situation, you should honestly admit that the feelings that have appeared are solely your fault. Moreover, it is recommended to remind the young man that you are sensitive to your friendships and do not want to lose them. However, it is recommended to emphasize that, having crossed this very “friendly” component, you will forever lose each other. If a man appreciates your relationship, he will back down. Otherwise, it is reasonable to ask the question: do you really need such a "friend"?

how to refuse a man

Talking about sex

In addition to the usual wording like “I'm busy” and “I actually have a boyfriend”, other methods of refusal can be used. So, some psychologists argue that the point is often not even in words. What does it mean?

If an unknown man offers intimacy, let your tone of voice, volume and general appearance show only one thing - with you he will not receive anything other than self-esteem restrained by the refusal. Let it be harsh phrases about the inadmissibility of contact with the first comer, who can give not a bouquet of flowers, but a visit to a venereologist. Some, after a firm and in some cases contemptuous “no,” put on their headphones and leave.

But how to deny a man intimacy if you have known each other for a long time?

Three options

A familiar man is denied for several reasons. Depending on them, an answer may be invented.

  1. Reluctance of intimacy with this person in principle. In this case, any options proposed in the previous section are suitable.
  2. Unreadiness. If this is your man, but he is in a hurry, then there is nothing wrong with honestly giving the reason. It’s worth saying right away that you don’t accept any arguments and will be deeply offended when you re-offer in the near future.
  3. Game "Conquer me."

The last paragraph has a separate action plan.

wounded self-esteem

How to say no so that it is yes

Many people think about how to refuse a man sex, so as not to lose him. Of course, rejection will be unpleasant for anyone, because he pretty much catches pride and pride. However, if everything is done correctly, then the relationship will not just not fall apart, but will reach a new level.

Although high morality is not considered fashionable now, men nevertheless do not accept women of free morals. It turns out that if a girl tactfully refuses to have sex, then she is not a “commodity”. What might it look like?

Raising a man’s self-esteem

Before you get up and leave, you can say something like: “You are easier, otherwise I can not resist!” Naturally, this will be perceived by a man as a challenge or a game. Therefore, a hint that you should not restrain yourself will not be long in coming. It is at this moment that the most key thought can be said: “I do not want to follow the instincts!” - and abruptly leave. Some say: “We are not animals!”

What is achieved in this way?

  1. A man feels at least Hercules, which is able to drive crazy.
  2. The girl appears in the image of a person who knows her worth.
  3. This behavior in plain text says: “I want, but not today!”
  4. Those who only want sex are eliminated.

However, it is often worth refusing. Accepting an offer from one particular kind of men, one cannot avoid trouble.

How to refuse a married person or relationship

It is worth noting that in recent years the question of how to refuse a married man has become increasingly relevant. Unfortunately, loyalty has long been out of trend. We will not discuss below why a relationship with a married person is bad. Consider only a few answers for those who do not want to have anything to do with such a relationship.

The simplest thing is to say it bluntly. As an option: “I prefer not to be on the bench for spare!”, “I am not interested in being a lover”, “Out there! Goodbye, "" I disgust your proposal. " As before - firmly, clearly, not making excuses.

refuse a married

Some conclusions

If you reduce all of the above to a few rules, then they will look like this:

  1. Speak confidently and clearly.
  2. Do not try to make excuses or explain your decision.
  3. Do not try to humiliate and do not be rude.
  4. Get out as soon as possible.

Often there is no opportunity to select the “ideal” place and time for refusal, so you should not rejoice a person with hopes, avoiding the answer. The longer you doubt, the more likely it will be impossible to refuse the offer!

Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/K3309/


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