Dating sites are special resources on which people who want to find a soul mate are registered. But in fact, the purpose of staying there can be completely different. How to relate to the fact that the husband is sitting on dating sites? Whether this is considered a betrayal and what this behavior can lead to is what we learn in this article.
What is treason
For every girl, this word is endowed with a special meaning. Someone believes that physical intimacy is mandatory, for others - even constant communication with the opposite sex is equated to treason. When a girl discovers that a man meets and communicates with other girls - for her this is a real blow. And the first thought that comes to mind: "He does not love me anymore." And even if there is no betrayal as such, the woman is worried that this is about to happen.
But it is worth considering why the husband is sitting on dating sites. There must be a reason why he is there. And only in 10% of cases a man gets acquainted to change his chosen one. In the rest, the whole thing lies in completely different things that could not have crossed your mind.
Of course, most women offend this behavior of the husband. And even if a lady does not equate innocent communication on a dating site with treason, in any case it is unpleasant for her, and something needs to be done. In a normal and strong family, where people love each other and trust their partner, this situation is unlikely to happen. Neither a man nor a woman will meet on various sites, because they completely miss each other.
But before proceeding with an action and causing a scandal, one should carefully study the reasons why a man could register on the site. In most cases, the main and main cause is family problems. And, as you know, the fault in this case lies with both the man and the woman. This does not mean at all that you need to start blaming yourself for all family problems and quarrels, but it should give you the idea that you need to change something.
Curiosity
Sometimes men register on dating sites in order to look at other girls. They do not do this because they want to meet with them. They are just curious about how the women of the opposite sex live. This is an absolutely innocent occupation. In this case, the man is just an occasional guest on a dating site.
New profiles always appear in the top, and therefore, most likely, in the first few hours after registration, new messages will begin to come to him. And if the husband sits on dating sites, most likely, just for fun, he will read them. That is how innocent communication begins.
Could this be dangerous? A married man who does not have enough communication with his wife can really start chatting on dating sites. With a high probability he will find there an interesting interlocutor with whom ordinary chats can go into something more about anything.
Emotional sphere
Most often, the desire to communicate with the opposite sex has any reason. If a person does not feel emotional satisfaction in the family, he will certainly look for him on the side. And one of the ways is a dating site. Here, another girl can:
- to support
- appreciate the virtues
- tell him that he is welcome.
These are exactly the emotions that a man may not have enough. Moreover, it is not at all necessary that the relationship between a man and a girl from the site will find a continuation in real life. Many husbands sit on dating sites and get what they want there. In the online space, they can play peculiar games and satisfy their emotional needs.
Complexes
Almost every person has a set of sensations that are expressed in a sense of personal inferiority. They gain strength if the other half constantly talks about them. Wives, for example, often reproach men for being losers. Due to the human psyche, the brain is trying to find evidence that this is not so. And so the husband with the whole baggage of complexes goes to a dating site. It is there that he can be a real hero and get communication with girls who admire him and increase his self-esteem.
But it should be remembered that at the same time they reduce the importance of the spouse in his eyes. Now, every time after a scandal with his legal wife, the spouse will go to the one who will support and comfort him. And it is not necessary that he hides the existence of a wife. A man finds in his interlocutor on a dating site a kind of vest, which you can complain about life. In turn, the ladies from these sites willingly agree to this role. They support someone else's husband and often say that the spouse does not value him and is unworthy of him.
Quarrels and Conflicts
If a woman, as a rule, is looking for a way to solve the problem, then for some men it is easier to get away from it all. And they go into online communication. The husband sits on dating sites and thereby rests from family problems. Sometimes men ask girls for advice on the site. It’s hard to imagine what they can advise. In this case, of course, you should talk with your spouse. Perhaps it will be possible to persuade him to listen to the advice of a psychologist.
The husband sits on dating sites at a time when quarrels and conflicts in the family are quite dangerous. At this vulnerable moment, under the influence of emotions, he may agree to meet a stranger from the site.
Many psychologists believe that if a man, during a quarrel in a family, is registered on a dating site and communicates there, it means that he is already subconsciously ready to break with his spouse. It is very important not to miss this moment, because it is not too late to establish a relationship.
How to understand intentions
Suppose a girl became convinced of her suspicions that her husband spends all his free time on a dating site. What to do? Why is he registered there? What are the goals? These questions necessarily arise in the female head. In order to find out, you will have to carefully study his profile on this site. We will assess the situation on several points:
- From which city are the girls with whom the spouse communicates. If they are all from different parts of the world, then we are not talking about physical betrayal. All communication ends on this site. If the girls are from the city where you live, or where the husband often goes on business trips, then most likely they are united not only by correspondence.
- What does he write to them in messages. Communication on dating sites can be done in completely different ways. For example, if he flirts, then he lacks vivid emotions. If in messages he often touches on the topic of sex, then he is not satisfied in this area.
- How is the profile filled. If there is a lot of information, the fields “hobbies”, “interests”, “dating goals” are filled in, then most likely the man is really very serious. Why is my husband sitting on dating sites, but the page is completely blank? No photos or personal information? Most likely, he is just curious to look at other girls.
Purpose in life
Every married man should have a lot of plans for the future. He is the head of the family, and therefore must take care of her. But what happens if he has no purpose in life? Then the man becomes bored, and he seeks entertainment. Someone plays games on the computer, and someone communicates with girls on various sites. Think about it, maybe you are doing not only your job, but also your spouse? In this case, you should not feel sorry for him.
Find together the goal in life, and let the beloved helps in its implementation. It is very important that this was a common dream, that a man liked her, inspired him. Indeed, quite often, women simply put their husband before the fact: "We need a bigger apartment." But these words do not cause a man any emotion. He lives well in the old one. So sit near the man and start dreaming.
For example: “Imagine if we had a bigger apartment, we could have sex more often. Sometimes I just want you when you pass by, but since we have a small living space and we are constantly in front of the children, you and I do this only at night. ”
Interestingly, female and male psychology is very different. A girl can do several things at the same time, but at the same time think about completely extraneous things. Men act differently. If the husband is constantly focused on his life goal, then he will not have time and desire to visit such sites.
The mistake of many wives lies precisely in the fact that they cannot direct a man in the right direction. Each family member lives his own life. For example, he constantly sits on dating sites, and his wife constantly disappears at work. Changing the usual course of things, you can easily wean your husband to visit such sites.
Male nature
Sometimes it happens that in a pair all is well. But the spouse discovers that the husband is constantly sitting on dating sites. And trying to find the reason why this happens, she finds nothing. They do not quarrel with their spouse, they have regular sex and complete mutual understanding. But why then is a man drawn to dating sites?
Some husbands, by their nature, simply cannot be with the same girl. They are constantly on the lookout for variety. In addition, they enjoy not just sex with a lover, but the process of winning her attention. And such men are constantly cheating on their wives. In this case, the woman has two options:
- Tolerate treason.
- File for divorce.
Of course, you can try to compete for your man and his attention. But only the chances that Casanova will change are very low. Sometimes, only under pain of losing a wife and a child forever, a man can completely change his behavior.
First reaction
The girl discovers that her husband is sitting on a dating site. How to respond? This is one of the first questions that come to mind. Of course, I really want to raise a huge scandal. But psychologists advise against this. In the process of conflict, the man will be closed from you, and you will not be able to find out the true reason for this act. Most likely, he will even deny everything. But it can turn out differently. Sometimes men begin to defend themselves immediately. And as you know: the best defense is an attack. And the conversation will smoothly turn into a large-scale quarrel with accusations and reproaches.
You need to choose a time when the man will be peppy, well-fed and happy. Gently hint to him about what you learned about his interaction with the girls. At the same time, without scolding him, ask why the husband is registered on a dating site and what it gives him. After listening to him, explain that for you this is quite an unpleasant phenomenon. Try to find together what exactly is missing a spouse. Do not be afraid to talk about candid topics. Very often, the cause of communication on dating sites is sexual dissatisfaction. Share your fantasies with your husband, and in return you will definitely hear what he dreams about.
Sometimes men say that they simply communicate on such sites and do not see anything wrong with that. In this case, you can offer him that you will also register there and will communicate with other men. Such an option is unlikely for her husband, and he will agree to delete his profile from the site.
Constant control
Sometimes, quite by accident, wives find out that the husband is talking on dating sites. But most often they do it on purpose: they often look in their spouse’s phone book, follow the history in browsers, and check mail. And sooner or later they find evidence of treason. This behavior of the girl suggests that she does not trust her spouse. And if this is so, then the family already has some problems.
Of course, a man sooner or later notices that they suspect him - and this is rather unpleasant news for him. Would anyone like someone they don't trust him? Therefore, before asking why a husband sits on a dating site, you should analyze your family life and your relationships in general. A smart and cunning girl will never tell her husband that she found him on a dating site, but will do everything to ensure that he is no longer there.
What to do
Is it possible to discourage a spouse from dating sites without revealing all the cards? It turns out that yes. For this, it is necessary that the husband notice only his spouse. If she is constantly angry, not in the mood, in a greasy dressing gown - then of course, he will go in search of another - a bright and interesting woman. Think about why a husband is on a dating site, see what kind of girls interest him. Now you should temporarily forget about this unpleasant incident and take care of yourself. Sign up for the gym, buy some new outfits and always beautiful underwear. Try to become beautiful not only externally, but also internally. You can sign up for any courses. The husband should see that next to him is a self-sufficient and interesting woman. Then, most likely, he will turn his attention to his spouse and forget about dating sites.
Jealousy
So, the husband is sitting on a dating site. What to do? The girl is in no hurry to read it. She decides to make him jealous. If he feels that he may lose his beloved, he will most likely quickly turn his attention to this situation. But this does not always happen and not with all men. There are weak guys who are not ready to fight for their lady and can go even further into online communication. In this case, it is important that flirting with another man does not go into treason.
In general, psychologists do not recommend this method. Only in some cases, men delete their profiles from dating sites and turn their attention to their spouse. In others, they begin to communicate more actively with girls and thus avenge their beloved.
How to live further
Girls who equate online communication with treason are often asked this question. This happens in the case when the correspondence with other ladies ended in a meeting or even physical intimacy. After the betrayal, establishing relationships is very difficult. And even if a man swears that this will not happen again, the question always arises in the subconscious mind: maybe the husband is again sitting on dating sites? The advice of a psychologist in this case comes down to the following: you should learn to trust your partner.
If a girl forgave the betrayal and decided not to break up, then she should no longer doubt her husband. The lack of trust in the family makes life a hell, for both men and women.
Try to forget what happened. Believe your man if you really want to establish family relations with him. If you understand that you cannot forgive him and you will constantly suspect - it is better to break off the relationship.
About 15% of women find that a husband sits on dating sites. Psychologists recommend that wives pay attention to the reasons why a man does this. The fact that a woman convicts him of communicating with other ladies does not mean that he will no longer continue to do so. If you do not change the situation and do not get rid of the reason, then the man will continue to get acquainted with other women, but next time he will be more careful.
It is very important to talk with your husband, look for problems together and solve them. Resentment and silence do not give positive results. Moreover, this may aggravate the situation in the family. It is much more difficult for women whose men refuse to discuss the situation and find a way out together. In this case, in the conversation you must definitely focus on the fact that such a husband’s behavior brings you pain and frustration. Men who truly love their women are willing to make concessions and compromises. But if the family no longer has fire and passion, then maybe there is no point in saving it.